


Window Pane

by rosierainn



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Anal Sex, Consensual Sex, Dark fic, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Domestic Violence, Drugged Sex, Drunk Sex, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, However i dont go into any details, I'm so sorry, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Kidnapping, Kylo Ren Has Issues, Kylo Ren again is not nice, Kylo Ren is Not Nice, Kylo owns you, LITERALLY, Murder, Murder Trials, Oral Sex, Psychological Torture, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rough Sex, Seriously theres so much going on, Sex Toys, Stockholm Syndrome, Surgery, Therapy, Vaginal Sex, Violence, Waterboarding, crackfic, mention of animal abuse, this is dark shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:15:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 45,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27256303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosierainn/pseuds/rosierainn
Summary: A cool breeze nipped at your exposed legs, causing goosebumps to erupt over your skin. You were curled into your comforter, comfy and safe, your cheek pressed against your pillow. Lips pursed and a small amount of drool seeping into the fabric. A creak came from the corner of your room, slightly rousing you from your slumber. You glanced around, your drooping eyelids barely taking in the scene. In your sleep riddled state, you didn't see him, his large figure stalking towards you. The whites of his eyes shining in the moonlight, it wasn't until you felt a palm slide up your side. Following the natural contours of your body, the emanating from it lulling you to sleep once again. A dip in the mattress, the springs creaking under the weight.Hot breath fanned over your neck, soft lips pressing onto the back of your ear. A deep hum filling your senses, you sighed. Cuddling back into the figure, wanting to get closer to the warm entity. A low chuckle sounded behind you, and then...Nothing.
Relationships: Ben Solo | Kylo Ren/Reader, Ben Solo/You, Kylo Ren/Reader, Kylo Ren/You
Comments: 57
Kudos: 108





	1. Therapy

**Author's Note:**

> TW/CW: This is dark shit, like explicitly horrible shit happens in this. However, I enjoy reading dark fics, and I super loved Stalker Clyde by @clumsycopy & was inspired by the oneshot EOS by @thetorturerwrites and I wanted to write something with the sameish tone for Halloween. NSFW, Violence, Murder, Non-con elements, Domestic Violence, Surgery, Explicit sex, oral sex, anal sex, sex toys, waterboarding, forced feeding, Animal abuse (just a brief mention, I do not go into any detail).

“Where would you like to start?” 

You shifted uncomfortably on the sofa. Tucking your frail legs underneath you, trying to compress into a ball so no one could see you, it was what you were used to...familiar. To be unseen, but always in sight. But now everyone was looking at you, everyone wanted to know your story. That's why you were in this stark white room, filled with furniture that is much too scratchy for your sensitive skin. Sitting across from a therapist, their eyes warm and inviting to any normal person. But you weren’t a normal person. 

Not anymore. 

“If you don’t want to talk that’s alright,” she sighed, setting down her pad and pen. Folding her hands to sit on her knee so her full attention was on you. Her body language was open, wanting you to share. But it hurt to think, to breathe, to exist now that you were truly alone. Not even he could comfort you, as he had for the past five years. 

Well, comfort was a stretch, but he was one of the only humans you came into contact with. He had made sure of it, even when you begged to be let out until he had beaten you within an inch of your life. You begged, for something, anything. He caved at one point, saying he was ‘sick and tired of hearing me complain’ so he got us a cat. 

It only lasted a week before he killed the cat in front of you. 

You were giving it too much attention, the attention that belonged to him. Your captor, your lover, your daddy, your master, whatever name he gave himself. Everything you did belonged to him, and he couldn’t have you worshipping something that wasn’t him. 

“Why don’t you tell me about before?” 

“Before?” you whispered. 

“Yes, before,” she coughed nervously, “Before, um, he had…” 

Taken, abducted, kidnapped, claimed you. 

You scratched the side of your neck, over a fresh incision mark. The doctors tried to find the tracker he had installed in your neck years ago, a painful procedure he had done himself. He had you pinned to the floor of the bathroom, straddling you across the chest. His strong legs kept you pinned as you writhed underneath him. Begging for him to stop, you promised you wouldn’t try to run away anymore, it was a one time mistake. You promised as you sobbed there, watching his mind process the pros and cons of the situation. For a few moments, you thought he was going to change his mind, the two of you had begun to trust one another, maybe he felt guilty for making you cry uncontrollably on the floor. But the moment was fleeting, and soon his brows dropped from their previously concerned position. His mouth contorting into a sick smile, his eyes no longer warm, but cold and calculating. Getting ready to rip your throat out with his teeth if he had to. 

They couldn’t find the tracker, the doctors told you it most likely was absorbed into the muscle of your neck after being placed so long ago. Being wrapped in the fibers and the only way to get it out would be to rip apart the muscles in your neck. Which was not something you wanted, in a few weeks you would have to be in court. Testifying against him, and you didn’t want to be stuck in a neck brace. It would only make him smile, to know that he made them do that to you, he would purr ‘see I wouldn’t have forced you to do that if you had just been good and stayed home. Now you can’t move your head the way I trained you.’

“Well,” you squeaked, “I don’t remember much about before… not much comes to mind if I think about anything.” 

“I see, well what can you tell me about the day he took you? Was there anything significant?” 

You chewed the inside of your cheek, trying to dig through the mush of memories that came before him. You had been brainwashed for so long, to be his, that you could barely piece together what was before the darkness. 

“It was the day after my birthday,” you averted your eyes from her, staring over her shoulder at the clock ticking away on the wall. “He took me the day after my 18th birthday.” 

Her pen clicked, scribbling down the first of her notes, “And what was the first year like? The police report stated that you were reported missing by your parents a few days after that, which was about 5 years ago.” 

Your throat began to constrict, bottom lip trembling as you thought about it. The horrible things he did, just to teach you lessons. Pain and suffering were his bread and butter, negative reinforcement to get what he wanted out of you. Pushing you to the point where you couldn’t even discern if you were alive. 

But he made sure you were alive, through everything he wanted you alive. To witness, to know what he was doing, that he was doing it for ‘our future together.’ He said he had seen it in a dream, the wonderful life we were going to have, the day after he met you. 

“The first year was,” you thought again, trying to put it delicately, “Harsh, I don’t think I saw out a window until the following spring. He had…” you swallowed back a sob, “He had kept me underground for a good portion. After the first week that is.” 

She scribbled again, her eyes flitting back and forth between you and the paper. You knew she was trying to get as much out of you as possible, the prosecutor needed your testimony while you were of sound mind and body. Especially since he was claiming you were mentally insane. They needed to be sure you could sit on the stand and not crack, tremble, under his gaze. 

“What happened the first week?” 

“I-I um,” you let out a choked sob, eyes glancing over to the glass of water on the coffee table between the two of you. Your hand darted out to grab it, but you stopped in mid-air. Withdrawing your hand and placing it on your lap, an instinct from him. Clearing your throat, your therapist finally looked up at you. Noticing your internal struggle, her eyes darted between your face and the water in front of you. Your cheeks flushing red as you held in your choked coughs, trembling as you waited for permission. That’s what he did, demanding you ask for anything. That way he could decide if you were worthy of it, for months he withheld basic needs. Not allowing you water, food or to use the bathroom without permission. 

Pushing the limits of your body, just so it could break for him. That way he could rebuild it in his image. 

“You can have some, if you want some…” she spoke, her voice wavering as she watched you struggle. 

Your hand snapped out, grabbing the glass. Bringing it to your lips, about to take a drink until you blurted out, “Thank you Kylo.” 

Instantly your therapist straightened, her eyes wide at you. But you hadn’t noticed what you said, just taking slow gulps of life-giving water. He didn’t like it when you chugged down water, it usually ended with him waterboarding you. His voice reverberating across the walls, ‘you want water so badly? here it is. Remember that you wanted this next time you decide to be a greedy bitch.’ 

The cup was empty, the sound of it hitting the coaster was louder than you anticipated. Clearing your throat you stared at the carpet, “I’m sorry, it’s just-just a habit.” 

She gave you a small smile, “It’s okay, it can be hard to get back to normal after what you’ve been through. Most trauma patients have those tendencies after the fact.” 

You nodded, collapsing into the couch. You felt sick, your stomach gurgling from the water hitting it too quickly. This is what he would talk about, not drinking too quickly. If he was feeling extra irritated with you when you disobeyed, he would force you to purge the liquid. Until you were spitting up stomach acid, and that would be all you got for sustenance that day. 

She settled once again, slightly glancing at her watch before addressing you again. “Can you tell me about your family? Have you seen them at all?” 

You shook your head, they hadn’t reached out to you. And you weren’t planning on reaching out to them, they didn’t look for you. Didn’t try enough to find you, that’s what he said. They could’ve done more, but they didn’t want you, you were a spoiled little brat. That’s why they didn’t look. They moved on. 

“No, I haven’t seen them.” 

She nodded, pen clicking to life once again, “And why is that?” 

You shrugged, warnings flashing inside your brain. Knowing that this was his fault, but deep down it bothered you that they never came. Or even got people to look for you, you had tried to see if anyone was looking. Scrounging through the old newspaper he had you use as a bathroom, listening intently on the news stories when he let you lay in his lap. Petting your hair and whispering how good you were being. 

“I haven’t wanted to reach out, it doesn’t feel right anymore.” You rubbed your hand, beginning to pick at your hangnails, another habit he would smack you for, “It feels like I'm a lost piece of a puzzle, no longer able to fit in with them.” 

“Where do you feel you fit in?” 

You let out a shaky breath, not sure what to say. 

She mirrored your breath, “Do you feel like you fit with him?” 

Tears erupted, flowing down your cheeks. You didn’t even know you had started crying, your body going into autopilot at the realization. 

“He’s the only puzzle I fit in anymore.”


	2. Trial

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A cool breeze nipped at your exposed legs, causing goosebumps to erupt over your skin. You were curled into your comforter, comfy and safe, your cheek pressed against your pillow. Lips pursed and a small amount of drool seeping into the fabric. A creak came from the corner of your room, slightly rousing you from your slumber. You glanced around, your drooping eyelids barely taking in the scene. In your sleep riddled state, you didn't see him, his large figure stalking towards you. The whites of his eyes shining in the moonlight, it wasn't until you felt a palm slide up your side. Following the natural contours of your body, the warmth emanating from it lulling you to sleep once again. A dip in the mattress, the springs creaking under the weight. 
> 
> Hot breath fanned over your neck, soft lips pressing onto the back of your ear. A deep hum filling your senses, you sighed. Cuddling back into the figure, wanting to get closer to the warm entity. A low chuckle sounded behind you, and then... 
> 
> Nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW/CW: This is dark shit, like explicitly horrible shit happens in this. However, I enjoy reading dark fics, and I super loved Stalker Clyde by @clumsycopy & was inspired by the one shot EOS by @thetorturerwrites and I wanted to write something with the sameish tone for Halloween. NSFW, Violence, Murder, Non-con elements, Domestic Violence, Surgery, Explicit sex, oral sex, anal sex, sex toys, waterboarding, forced feeding, Animal abuse (just a brief mention, I do not go into any detail).

You didn’t sleep, you couldn’t get your body to shut down. Even though you tried all the tricks in the book, warm milk, turkey, sleeping pills. But nothing, you spent the whole night staring at the ceiling of your hotel room. 

You didn’t have a home, or anyone to go stay with. All of your previous friends had moved on from you, the only home you could go to was his. Sitting there, empty of life after years of excitement. 

If only those walls could talk instead of you. 

The alarm went off on the nightstand, alerting you that it was time to get up. To shower, and dress yourself, and to drive to court. Basic human tasks, but you felt so uncomfortable doing them. 

He bought all your clothes, even took you to a select few stores for special items when he wanted to take you somewhere. He drove, it had been so long since you had driven. Your license had expired while you were ‘captive’, and the DMV was a nightmare on your own. Kylo would also pick out how he wanted your hair if he wanted it up or down. In a bun or ponytail, that way if he wanted to yank you back if you were too far away. Crack your neck as he bent you backward while he fucked you like an animal. Or if he wanted it long, so he could run his fingers through it and fill his senses with your scent. He let you get such expensive shampoos, nothing cheap for you. 

He wanted you to feel cared for, that way when he punished you. He could take things away since you weren’t worthy of his gifts. 

You carefully dried your hair, pulling it back into two symmetrical braids. That way he didn’t have the pleasure of seeing his favorite hairstyles. He hated braids, his mother used to braid his hair as a boy. 

He hated her too, which is why you weren’t allowed to braid your hair. 

Or else he would shave your head. 

The taxi pulled up right on time, taking you to the courthouse. Your lawyer told you he would meet you on the steps, a police escort would be there too. Apparently, the story of him had caught the eyes of the world. Cameras and reporters had been swarming since you were found, a suspected dead victim. Found, and alive too. 

A knock on the window jolted you from your thoughts, you quickly exited the cab. Smoothing out your black dress, if people didn’t know any better they would think you were dressed for a funeral. And in a way you were, but it was unclear what the death would be for. 

“You ready?” Your lawyer whispered, his hand outstretched. He never touched you without permission, learning it the hard way. The first time the two of you had met was the second day or your ‘release’. A simple pat on the shoulder, and you went into panic mode. Erupting in sobs, shaking and begging for mercy. Your body prepared for the eventual beating that came with your outburst. 

Finn never touched you after that, not without consent. 

You nodded, trying to smile at him. His hand pressed onto your lower back, not a comforting gesture. But it was something to distract you from the cameras and screams from the people. Dozens of them were lining the steps, shouting for you to turn. Most of them not knowing your name, just calling you the victim. 

Looking up, you felt small. Smaller than you had felt before. The building was daunting, the eves carved with pictures of truth and justice. Claiming that all would be set right inside, which side was fair. But what would be fair about this? Inside would just be a gruesome reminder of what was now your life. You could never be someone else, branded forever as his. 

The courtroom filled with people, all the spectator rows were stuffed by the time you and Finn had settled. You faced forward, back straight, hands in your lap and ankles crossed. The posture of a lady, not as he would say ‘a slouching brat.’ 

Finn leaned in, whispering in your ear, “Just so you know, the defense has requested to cross-examine your testimony, so just try to keep your answers as precise as you can.” 

Before you could agree the doors flew open, a collected gasp coming from the room. You knew he had arrived, no one was able to pull attention like he did. The click of his oxford black shoes echoing throughout the courtroom. Those same shoes the ones you had to shine every day, sometimes with your tongue. Wiping away the grime that built up from his day at work, or your combined spittle, or even your cum when he forced you to ride the glossy leather. 

You didn’t move, not wanting to grace him with even a glance. The slow, methodical steps getting closer and closer to the bench. A squeak from the little doors, followed by a grunt hello towards your lawyer before the creaking of a chair. Struggling under his immense size, his power, that he drew from the room. 

Finn glanced at you, before getting up from his seat. He and the defense lawyer meeting upfront with the judge. Momentarily leaving you alone, you looked down at your hands. Noticing the hangnail you had been picking was attempting to heel. You gave a quick look around, avoiding his direction, before bringing your thumb to your mouth and chewing. 

A low tsk came from your left, followed by a shift in a seat. You looked over from the corner of your eye, spying what you already knew was true. He was looking right at you, his auburn eyes smoldering. Dark hair waved across his handsome face. Pale skin peppered with freckles, the same freckles you once kissed when he had a bad day at work. A smirk playing at his lips, plush, and petal pink. Another tsking noise emanated from his mouth, followed by a low growl, “I’ve taught you better than that.” 

Immediately you dropped your thumb. Head bowed down as you stared at your lap. Everyone was still murmuring amongst themselves, unable to notice he was speaking to you. 

“And here I thought you knew how to be a good girl.” 

Your head snapped to the left, meeting his eyes. A snarl on your mouth as you hissed at him, “Fuck you.” 

He only smiled, flashing his crookedly beautiful teeth, “It’s nice to see you too my love, too bad you have a nasty mouth.” 

Your throat felt like there was a rock in it, unable to swallow down your tears as they flowed. 

“Hm,” he purred, “I almost forgot how delicious you look when you’re afraid.” 

The bailiff cleared his throat, “All rise for the honorable Judge Riley.” 

An old man came out, his face withered down to its last days. His wrinkles each telling a story, the toll each case he had seen marking him for eternity. Both of your heads snapped up as he took his place. You tried to stand proud, knowing that you were here not only to represent yourself… but the others that were involved. 

“Be seated,” the judge boomed, his voice echoing along the paneled room. Everyone shuffled back into their seats, Finn took his place next to you. Giving you a heartwarming smile, and holding your clasped hands. 

“We are here today to hear the introduction and trial of Mrs. (Y/N) Ren versus her husband Mr. Kylo Ren. The charges include domestic abuse, assault and battery, domestic and non-domestic sexual assault, and murder in the First Degree.” 

You shifted in your seat, your last name made you uncomfortable. He had taken that final piece of your old life. The two of you were wed in your 4th-year of captivity. You had begged Finn to allow you to file under your previous last name, but he wouldn’t do it. The police didn’t want to prolong the trial, especially because Ren’s lawyer had already begun posting his bail. 

“Prosecution, your opening statement please.” 

Finn stood up slowly, straightening out his tie and clearing his throat. Stepping away from your bench and into the center of the courtroom. 

“Honorable Judge Riley, members of the jury and spectators. I am here to represent the victims of 10 families, 9 of them are no longer with us. Gone before their time because of the immense power, manipulation, of one man. I am not here to convince you that Mr. Kylo Ren is a monster, I believe that just by being in the same room as him. You can feel the depth of his influence. I am here to bring justice, especially for a young woman, a girl. A girl that was stolen from her loving family-,” 

“Objection,” His lawyer sneered, rising to his feet, “This is supposed to be an opening statement for his case against. Not a biased account of my client’s accusations.” 

“Sustained. Please refrain from leading the jury.” 

Finn cleared his throat once more, “As I was saying, I hope that the jury will be able to give justice and closure to the victims I represent.” 

“And the defense.” 

“As we discussed previously Judge Riley, my client has requested to present his case on his own behalf.” 

Judge Riley sighed, rubbing his eyes as he grew frustrated with the case already. “Yes I recall, proceed.” 

Your head whipped around to look at Finn, eyes wide in shock. Why hadn’t he mentioned this? Why was he allowed to do this? Finn turned to you, “I didn’t know, I promise.” 

The bench across you creaked, slow long strides working their way to the center of the room. Even with his hands handcuffed in front of him, he was still menacing. He lifted his wrists, combing his long hair away from his face. “Ladies and gentlemen,” he crooned, his voice was honey. A siren song luring in their victims, beckoning them to come close enough so he could snap. 

He spun on his feet, his eyes now piercing into your own. Face neutral as he began to address the court, not once wavering from you. His gaze running up and down your figure, lingering on your braids. You saw how they darkened as he took them in, the blatant disobedience against him. He was practically foaming at the mouth as he spoke. Wanting more than anything to wrap his hands around them, snapping your neck as he dragged you along the courtroom floor. Growling and snapping at anyone who tries to tear you from his claws. 

“I do hope you all use your common sense and listen to all the sides of the story brought to you today.” 

The rest of the trial went by so slowly, dozens of people were brought up to the stand. Friends and family members of the victims were paraded up and down the room. Even your parents were brought up, your mother sobbing crocodile tears as the defense ripped into her. Questioning how they had the police halt the investigation after only 5 months, why didn’t they want their baby girl? Your father was no better, stating that they assumed you had just run off with some man. You were an adult, no longer their problem. 

Just like he said. 

After almost 3 hours of witnesses, it was time for you to take the stand. The judge called your full name, his old eyes looking at you in shame. You could feel your body betraying you, the tremor that started when you first saw him began to move into a full blow shake. Unable to stand up on your own, clasping your hand on Finn's shoulder in an attempt to get up, your feet failing to stand their ground. 

Sweat began to bead at your hairline and your upper lip, trembling as you thought about the trek to the stand. Finn gave you a nervous look, trying to read your expression. You took in a shaky breath and spilled your guts out on the floor. The spectators emitting a loud gasp, backing away as you heaved up your dinner. The small portions that sustained you spewing across the hardwood. You suddenly felt strong hands around you, snaking their way around your bicep and gently pulling you from the floor. 

The gabble slammed on the judges’ desk, “Order, Mr. Ren back away from the victim.” 

The gentle pull turned into a yank, fingernails digging into your clothed flesh. Above you, he spat back, “Excuse me sir, but she is my wife. I don’t intend for her to lay in her own filth.” 

As the words registered in your head, you let out a cackle, a full-blown crackle. His hand threatening to rip open your dress sleeves. ‘I don’t intend for her to lay in her own filth.’. Where was that when he made you vomit around his cock, forced you to piss on the bathroom floor when you refused to go when he commanded you, shoving your nose into the dried blood on the carpet of his bedroom when you started your period in the middle of the night. 

Finn rushed over, grabbing your other arm and pulling you away. Dragging your once nice shoes through your mess, “I'd like a recess, that way my client can recollect herself.” 

“Granted, 15 minutes.” 

You were rushed out of the room, away from the cameras and especially him. Trying to catch your breath as you attempted to keep up with Finn’s quick steps. “Here, I‘ll watch the hallway, just go take some deep breaths okay?” 

“Okay,” you croaked, pushing the door open and rushing into the bathroom. Immediately collapsing into a ball on the floor, cowering under the sinks. Heavy sobs ripped through your throat, voice breaking as you tried to scream. Dragging your fingernails across your face, just so you could feel that you were still alive. 

The door creaked open, soft footsteps entering your bubble. Shoes creasing as they crouched down in front of you. You prepared yourself to be questioned by some random court employee, attempting to soothe you. 

“You’re ugly when you cry.” 

Your eyes snapped up, met with a predator's gaze. His teeth flashing at you as he watched your brain process what was happening. “What,” you whispered. 

“Oh my love,” his left hand came to rest against your cheek. His wedding band pressing into your cheekbones, you attempted to kick away. But you had been backed into a corner, with him. 

And he was uncuffed. 

“How-how,” you gasped, “How did you get in here Kylo.” 

His face fell, a scowl now etched across it, standing to his full height. The tips of his shoes pressing into your own, caging you in. “Get up.” 

You violently shook your head, “No-no-no p-please Kylo. Please, I’ll be good please no.” 

“Get. Up.” 

Your legs were jelly, not allowing you to balance. Falling into the sinks on the wall multiple times, anger was rolling off of him in waves. Hands shooting out and hauling you to your feet. A palm clasped over your mouth as he pinned your back to his chest. Forcing you to stare into the mirror, his shadow filling your senses. 

“Here’s what's going to happen,” he hissed in your ear, spit flying into your braids. “I’m going to shove my cock inside your needy whore cunt, where it belongs. And you aren’t going to make any noise or else I’ll shove your face into a toilet while I do it.” 

You whimpered, tears now flowing down his fingers. Attempting to shake your head as he stared at you, feeble fingers clawing at his suit sleeve to release you. 

“Oh, you don’t think you deserve your punishment?” He shook your head, “Huh? It’s been a month and you already have forgotten my rules? Wearing this slutty little outfit, letting a little sniveling lawyer touch you. He can't protect you, especially not from me. Your husband.” 

You stopped fighting, instead sobbing into his hand. Eyes squeezing shut as you felt him maneuver you into the biggest stall. Finally releasing you so he could secure the doorways. You clung to him, pleading for him to stop. To just listen to you, you offered him anything. Anything to keep him from punishing you, even going so far as to say that you would lie on the stand for him. 

He turned, smirk returning as he began to unbuckle his trousers. Belt clanging on the dirty tile floor, “Oh no, I don’t want that. I want you to relive every. single. moment. of our lives together.” He spun you, hands bracing over the toilet as he groped your tights. Tearing them down your legs, “I want you to know that you did this, you ran from me. After you told me you loved me. After you married me!” Your skirt flipped up, panties yanked down with the rest. A hand dug into your braids, shoving your face closer to the water. Snot and tears falling into it as you prepared for him. “And even now,” three fingers thrust into your cunt, tearing you in an attempt to ready you for him. “You’re dripping for me, this sloppy cunt missed me. Covering my fingers in your cum and I haven’t even started.” 

A hot and heavy head breached your entrance, a deep exhale from above you. Your own body relaxing at the familiar sting from him, you couldn’t help it. For five years he trained you to take him. In another life, you would’ve given into him willingly. He always knew how to make you beg, beg for him. 

Another hand fell on you, gripping your hip as he slowly thrust inside you. Your walls screaming at the intrusion after weeks without him. You could feel yourself getting wetter the more he canted his hips. One more thrust and he was fully inside you, head pressed into your cervix. “Tell me. Tell me (Y/N).” 

A choked sob left your throat, your heart momentarily seizing at his request. You wanted so badly to scream at him, scream until you lost your voice so that anyone could find him. Or even notice that he was gone. 

But you couldn’t. Your lizard brain, your sick and twisted brain wanted this. Your body wanted this, and fuck you needed him to give you this. 

“Kylo,” you choked, his hand shoving you within an inch of the water. “Kylo please-.” 

“Say it,” he thrust once more, pushing you even closer. 

You closed your eyes, taking in a breath for the inevitable moment you would drown in the sea of his torture. 

“You have 30 seconds to either say it, or else I’m going to rip these braids from your skull.” 

“I love you Kylo, please,” you inhaled again, “Fuck me, please.” 

“Good girl,” you could hear his smile as he dunked you. Cock fucking into you once again, the sounds of your screams turning to bubbles as he pounded you. Your pussy was weeping for him, tightening around his length each time he pulled you from the water and dunked you back down. 

You weren’t sure when he finished. 

One moment he was inside you, claiming how much he loved you and missed you. How he was sorry for having to do this to you, but you left him no choice. 

Then it was just you, sputtering out water that had seeped into your lungs. You would probably get pneumonia again, a disease familiar to you now. Your inner thighs were sticky, coated in his seed that had begun to seep from your abused pussy. 

It took everything in you to leave the bathroom, to slink down the halls. Your braids squeezed off enough water to keep suspicion away from you. Most people would assume you had cried all your makeup off, partly true. 

You pushed the door open, greeted with multiple faces. All of them pausing their conversations as you shivered past them. Stepping through the partition to your bench, the vomit now mopped away. Finn approached you, his face etched with concern, “Hey where’d you go? No one answered when I checked on you. Are you sure you want to do this?” 

You glanced over your shoulder, his eyes already staring at you. His lips mouthing out ‘I love you’ followed by a small wave through his cuffed hands. 

“Yeah, I’m ready.”


	3. The First Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A cool breeze nipped at your exposed legs, causing goosebumps to erupt over your skin. You were curled into your comforter, comfy and safe, your cheek pressed against your pillow. Lips pursed and a small amount of drool seeping into the fabric. A creak came from the corner of your room, slightly rousing you from your slumber. You glanced around, your drooping eyelids barely taking in the scene. In your sleep riddled state, you didn't see him, his large figure stalking towards you. The whites of his eyes shining in the moonlight, it wasn't until you felt a palm slide up your side. Following the natural contours of your body, the warmth emanating from it lulling you to sleep once again. A dip in the mattress, the springs creaking under the weight. 
> 
> Hot breath fanned over your neck, soft lips pressing onto the back of your ear. A deep hum filling your senses, you sighed. Cuddling back into the figure, wanting to get closer to the warm entity. A low chuckle sounded behind you, and then... 
> 
> Nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW/CW: This is dark shit, like explicitly horrible shit happens in this. However, I enjoy reading dark fics, and I super loved Stalker Clyde by @clumsycopy & was inspired by the oneshot EOS by @thetorturerwrites and I wanted to write something with the sameish tone for Halloween. NSFW, Violence, Murder, Non-con elements, Domestic Violence, Surgery, Explicit sex, oral sex, anal sex, sex toys, waterboarding, forced feeding, Animal abuse (just a brief mention, I do not go into any detail).

“What do you remember about the first year?” Your therapist asked point-blank, you knew she had grown frustrated. So had you, it had been a few days after the initial trial date and she was anxious to understand what trauma lay ahead with you. 

The prosecution was too, unsatisfied with your testimony. You had crumbled under the pressure, he was the one who questioned you. Making you admit to every little detail of your lives together. Ripping open your freshly scarred wounds so he could infect them. 

He had the balls to ask you why you willingly married him, if he was such a monster why would you marry him? The answer to you was as plain as day, he would kill you if you didn’t. And even though he had stopped berating you as much in the later years, you knew it was a matter of time before he snapped. But he kept questioning, egging you to admit that you consented to the marriage. 

That you consented to everything. 

Even the repeated abuse he inflicted on you, he wanted to hear you tell the jury that it was your fault. That you did it to yourself, he was only trying to help you become a better person. Better captive, better lover, and a better wife. 

When you refused to admit that you were a consenting partner in it, he proceeded to show evidence that you were lying. 

Evidence being tapes, recordings, images. All from your time together, he had recorded everything. Revealing to the jury a recording of you begging, pleading him to fuck you until you saw stars. How you loving choking on his cock, showing a video of a particularly gruesome blowjob. You were fully naked, mascara running down your cheeks. Eyes glossy with tears and lips puffy around his cock. In it you were fully consenting to him, whimpering, ‘Please Kylo, I need your cock. Anywhere.’ 

You knew it made him hard when he showed the videos. He wanted to humiliate you, show the jury that you were an unreliable witness. Show the people that you were nothing more than an ungrateful housewife who had dragged their lovers spat to the courts. 

“Well, the first day is a blur. I only remember… certain moments,” you trailed off to your therapist. Facing away from her as you cuddled into the couch, picking your nail polish off as you waited for her unsatisfied rebuttal. 

She nodded, clicking her pen as she began scribbling, “And what were those moments?”

You sighed, settling into the cushions as you began to spill the first year. 

\----- 

Your body ached, neck stiff, arms folding in a weird position and your legs tucked into your form. It was an unusual sleeping position but you had fallen asleep in weird ones so you didn’t think about it. A strange hissing sound filled your ears, causing you to blink slowly awake from your slumber. Leaning up you found yourself in a dark room, a TV on across the room mounted on the wall. Underneath it sat a stand, covered in oddities that you could barely make out in the dark of the room. 

You glanced around, squinting as you noticed the minimalist style that swept the room. You were perched on a couch, Leather sliding under your skin, the only thing covering you was your nightgown. Goosebumps covering your skin at the cold fabric underneath you. You sat up more, attempting to stretch your arms, trying to crack your knuckles like you did every time you had woken up. 

You couldn’t move your arms. 

They were bound in front of you, hands clasped together underneath your chin, your elbows knotted in scratchy robe. You immediately panicked, thrashing and pulling your arms to Houdini your way out of it. Kicking your legs out from underneath you, they were unbound, trying to reach your feet up to your arms. Folding your body into itself. 

“I’m glad you're flexible.”

You froze, slowly bringing your feet back down to cover the exposed flesh you had shown with attempting to escape. Your eyes began to scan the darkroom, the only light coming from the TV. Over in the corner, towards what seemed like a hallway, stood a dark figure. Easily double your size, the only thing you could discern was his eyes. Bright and wide, moving up and down your seated form. Drinking you in as you struggled. 

You cleared your throat, “Wh-what?” 

He hummed, moving across the room, stepping past the TV, screen bringing more of his features into view for you to squint at. Moving closer to you his hand shot out, softly caressing your hair away from your face. 

You heard him crouch behind you, his breath now fanning over your exposed shoulder. “You smell so good when you're frightened,” you felt him move closer, something wet nipping at your shoulder. You jumped, shoulder colliding with his jaw. 

He growled, backing up immediately. Hissing as he rubbed his hand over his mouth and jaw, Eyes boring into yours as you scrambled to the opposite end of the couch, feet kicking across the slick leather. 

“I don’t think you wanted to do that love.” 

He advanced on you, yanking your ankle towards him. You began kicking and screaming at him, tears flowing down your cheeks, “Please, please let me go, you have the wrong person!” 

He clucked his tongue at you, taking a seat on the couch. Dragging your body across his lap, stomach on his legs. You kept squirming, kicking your legs back against your cheeks. Attempting to buck him off, but he wouldn’t budge. Draping a forearm across your back, pinning you hard into him. You could feel his pants scraping against your belly, the seems around his crotch digging into you. His right hand pinned your legs back, snarling as he spoke, “You belong to me now my love, I suggest you get used to it.” 

His hand struck you, harsh and violently. Nails piercing the skin as it moved, rearing back and slamming into you again and again. You screamed, tears flowing down your cheeks as he rubbed your cheeks raw, “Now now, we don’t want the neighbors to complain do we?” 

You squealed, bucking away from him as he wrangled your torso flush with him. He hissed at you, “You will sit still.” He spanked you again, harsh enough to cause you to shriek. “You will be a good girl like I know you are,” another sharp slam, not giving you any time to breathe, “Or else you’ll be punished.” 

Tears flowed down your cheeks, openly sobbing as he continued. You couldn’t keep track, brain going fuzzy from the pain, legs attempting to buck him off every time his hand came into contact with your ample bottom. At some point he had pulled your underwear into a wedgie, encasing your folds with the fabric. 

“If you’re going to act like a baby,” he snarled. 

“Then I’m going to treat you like one.” 

He smacked you. Hard. Causing you to scream, ripping through your throat as it erupted out of you. Involuntarily allowing yourself to piss, soaking through your undies and his jeans. Your mess trickling onto the carpet. You wept, apologizing profusely when you realized what had happened. 

“P-pl-please, I-i’mmm sorry,” you took in a deep breath, hips dodging his rough fingers as they tried to press into you, “I didn’t mea-a-n to.” 

He clucked his tongue, hand rubbing into your soaked crotch. Finger prodding at your entrance, through your piss-stained underwear, as he spoke, “Don’t you fuckin’ lie to me.” 

Fingers pulling your panties aside, shoving his middle finger into your heat, “You liked pissing on me, you fucking disgusting whore.” 

Digging inside of you over and over, dragging his nail against your walls as he spoke. “You want me to make you do it again? Make you piss all over our nice carpet?” 

You sobbed, shaking your head no, but he kept on pushing you. Two fingers now prodding your bladder while you heard his pants being pulled down. 

“You better ask permission when you piss again, or else it’ll be the last thing you do.” 

After the first week, Kylo had had enough. Throwing you into his basement whenever he left. You were fully naked, scratching at the doorway. Throat sore from all the screaming, all the brutal abuse from his cock, continually fucking into you. Pouring his cum or piss into you whenever he felt like it. Finally, you had had enough, biting the tip of him. He had beaten you after that, fist breaking your cheekbones into two. Your lips bursting at the seams, bleeding all over his cock when he face fucked you that morning. 

You could barely see, eyes swollen shut from his punches. You didn’t have a mirror. The only thing you could discern your reflection from was an old piece of metal, kept away from you because of the chains he bound you with. He knew you would try to kill yourself if you were left to your own devices. You had told him over and over, trying to egg him into doing it himself. 

But he never did, telling you, “I need you alive.” 

“You need to know what I’m doing, know that I’m doing it for us.” 

He would whimper it every time he mounted you, pressing your cheek into the cold cement of the basement floor. Your knees scraping against it, cheek tearing at every thrust. He would openly sob, “If you were a good girl I wouldn’t have to keep you like this.” 

“I could give you a shower,” he grunted, cock pounding into your dirty cunt, “Let you sleep in my bed. But instead, you want to be a little bitch.” 

He would smack you across the face until you bled. Thrusting his cock down your throat until you were throwing up his cum and your own blood. Yelling at you how filthy you were, that this was your own doing. If you had just let him take care of you, you wouldn’t be losing your teeth. 

You had lost track of time, there were no windows in the basement. He kept you chained, completely naked with your wrists raised above your head. Your ankles locked into a spreader bar, always ready for him to slide between them, given that you weren’t conscious enough to spit on him. 

He had begun to withhold water from you, making you beg as he pissed on you. Your flesh begging for sustenance. Crying out when he would piss in your mouth, “You fuckin’ nasty slut, you can’t even have real water? Instead, you’ll settle for my piss? Disgusting. It’s amazing that I even fuck you.” 

You would beg while he mounted you, pussy achingly dry as he spat on you. “Please master… I wanna be good for you…” 

He would look at you with sad eyes, nodding at each of your words while he forced himself inside you. Eyes rolling back when he met your wetness, “You aren’t ready yet.” 

Months had gone by. 

You were kept on the verge of death. 

Lips cracking as he shoved his cock in, now holding you as he filled you with his cum. Cooing in your ear how good you were. Giving you trace amounts of water, feeding it to you through his mouth. Taking a large gulp while he fucked into you, watching as you licked your scar ridden lips as he chugged from the bottles himself. Pushing the leftover into your aching mouth while he did it. Forcing you to cling to him, your life-giver. 

That’s what he was. That’s what he made sure to be, your life-giver. 

You woke up to the sound of the door creaking open, footsteps prancing down the metal stairs. Your eyes were squeezed shut, mouth gaping, and tongue out to prepare for his cock. 

Only today was different, his hands found your cheeks. Thumbs stroking your flesh as he whispered into your lips, “You’ve been such a good girl. I think you deserve a reward.”   
He had taken you upstairs, carrying your decaying form into a bathroom. Your eyes couldn’t even focus on the specifics, just knowing you were in a bathroom was enough to make you weep. No more would you have to relieve yourself on newspaper, sitting in your own filth while he degraded you for being a human. 

Kylo set you on the toilet, giving you a small peck as he stepped away. Slowly stripping off his clothing while he watched you relieve yourself. Once he was fully bare, he turned to the shower, softly turning on the water and testing it with his palm. He went to you, kissing your temple as he spoke, “Hold onto me, my love.” 

You sobbed as he cleaned you, wiping away all the dirt and grime that had accumulated. Clinging to him as you praised him for taking care of you. Kylo just kissed you, telling you how good you were being. After he had washed you, he held you in his arms. Hands rubbing into your flesh, “You need to eat more darling, you’re chilled to the bone.” 

You croaked, burying your face into his shoulder, “You don’t feed me.” 

Kylo pulled back, face scrunched in displeasure. “It’s because you aren’t good enough to deserve to eat.” He shoved you down to your knees, pushing his flaccid cock into your mouth, “Maybe I should bring a woman in who knows how to please me, maybe that will make you understand what will make me happy.” 

He shoved you out of the shower, drying only himself off after that. Tying a collar around your neck that night, along with a chain leash. Inviting over a woman, forcing you to watch as she ate what he had made them. Brushing her cheek and telling her how beautiful she was, not even paying attention to you as you whined. He dragged you to the bedroom, forcing you to watch as he fucked her. 

Filling every hole he could with his cum, making you eat it out of her when he was done. Afterward telling her how good she was, how she wasn’t, ‘gutter trash.’. She beamed at him the whole time, eating up his praise. Her slutty pussy lose and infected for him to fuck, moaning wantonly while he did it. You were disgusted, unable to look away at the scene in front of you. 

Kylo made sure you were watching, yanking on your leash whenever you moved away, snarling at you, “No. You better watch you ungrateful slut. You see how good she is?” He would moan as he fucked into her from behind, his fat cock tearing into her asshole as she screamed. “She knows how good she’s getting it, not being a little bitch and fighting me.” 

The fucking went on for hours, Kylo made sure to make it a marathon when he punished you this way. Sending them home to their own warm beds with a kiss and a smile. His dark eyes turning to you after he was done. He would crouch down to your level, a hand caressing your cheek, “Did you see how grateful she was? She would’ve given a million dollars to be where you are.” 

You sobbed into his hand, nodding at his every word. Shaking like a leaf as his eyes searched yours. That evening would be the first time you consensually gave yourself to him. Begging, no pleading for him to fill you with his cum. “Please Kylo, you can’t fuck anyone else….I need you! Please don’t leave me!” you would heave, riding him in desperation. 

He would give you nothing in return, making you prove that you needed him. Riding him as he sat back and watched, his cock bruising deep inside your cunt, hands clasped behind his head. You cried at him, fingernails crawling at his arms. Begging for him to touch you, “I’ll be good, please!” 

If you beg sweet enough, he would allow you to sleep in his bed. Cradling you into his strong arms, weeping as you succumb to the comfort. 

“If you were good like this all the time, I wouldn’t have to punish you. You know it hurts me when I have to,” He would whisper into your hair. Lips pressing against your ear, tongue darting out to taste your clean flesh. “I know,” you whisper, curling into him harder. Nights like these, it was so hard to think of him as a monster. Rocking you softly in his arms, deep voice humming you to sleep. How could someone so tame, be capable of breaking you over and over, just to pick up the pieces again. 

\-----

It’s snowing. 

You can hear the sound of shovels scraping the pavement above you. Your cheek pressed against the cement walls, aching to hear the soft snowflakes hit the ground. To feel the cold breeze nip at your flesh, maybe even make an angel. 

The noises halted, the garage door closing above. The pounding of boots vibrating through the walls. You could practically see the snow falling off them, flaking onto the bare floor before he tore them off. He hated getting the house dirty, that's why he kept you down here. You were still just a filthy whore, ruining his things. 

“When will you learn.” 

His footsteps broke you from your trance, pounding down the stairs to your room. You sat up straight, hands folded in your lap. Knees tucked under yourself, showing no hit of a smile until he greeted you. “What a good girl you are,” he cooed. Standing at the bottom of the steps, his hair slightly damp from the falling snow. Clothes still dusted as he watched you, eyes drinking you in. “Sitting here all pretty for me,” he approached you slowly. Crouching down to your level, hand brushing back your knotted hair from your face. A smirk graced his plush lips, those same lips that had bitten you until you hemorrhaged blood not even three days ago. “Does my little girl want something? Hmm?” 

You nodded slowly, swallowing back your fear. This was the first time you would make a request to him, and you hoped to god that it wouldn’t backfire on you. “I-I-I-.” 

“Use your words baby, you know Daddy doesn’t like it when you stutter. It makes you sound so stupid.” 

“I want to go outside,” you whimpered, quickly adding a please to your demand. Kylo’s eyebrows furrowed, hand leaving your cheek while he chewed his tongue in thought. His eyes were darting all over your face, studying to see if this was a ploy for your first attempt at escape. You had thought about it, but you knew you were too weak right now to get away. You didn’t even have clothes, you would freeze before you got far enough away. 

No, you had to bide your time. Slowly make him trust that you were his innocent plaything. Then you could finally be free, but for now. You really wanted to see that the world still existed. 

Kylo said nothing, just stood, and grabbed you by your upper arm. Hauling you up the stairs, practically dragging you as you stumbled over your jelly legs. He placed you on the rug, commanding you to sit and stay. Disappearing down the hallway, leaving you to adjust to the house. 

He usually didn’t let you up here in the daytime, if he did it was because you were being rewarded. Or you had gotten too filthy for him to stand anymore, needing to bathe you before he felt comfortable to fuck you again. 

You sat crossed legged, keeping your back pin-straight while you took shallow breaths. It was rare for you to get this far, you didn’t want to make a wrong move and be beaten. Not today, not when you were so close to seeing the outside. 

He returned moments later, “Get up.” You slowly obliged, allowing him to inspect you. Hands dragging across your bare skin, lightly palming your breasts. Smacking them as he moved down to your lower portion. Kylo pushed a hand between your legs, tapping them to spread apart. His palm was so warm, cupping your sex completely. He hummed as your willingness, even bucking your hips forward to please him. 

“Here’s what's going to happen,” he whispered into your hair. “I’m going to take you out, let you pick out some clothes.”Kylos middle finger began to part your folds, sliding back and forth from your entrance to your clit. “Maybe even take you to dinner,” he dipped inside you, pulling a sweet sigh from your lungs. Eyes falling shut at the rare soft touch, curling into you as he cooed more. “Since you’ve been such a good girl for Daddy.” You nodded, beginning to whine as he fucked his finger into you. Pussy slicking up from the praise, oh how you longed for him to be sweet to you. To feel him treat you delicately, softly prodding your entrance. Another finger sliding inside you, knuckles pushing them further. 

After a few strokes, he stopped, keeping them buried inside you. His voice was just above a whisper, sharp as a knife, “But if you even try to run, step away from me for even a second. I’ll tie you to a post outside and let you freeze to death. Do you understand me?” 

“Yes,” you nodded furiously, “Yes, I promise I won’t. I’ll stay with you. Please.” 

“Good.” 

He dressed you; black leggings, warm fuzzy socks, long sleeve black top, even having you wear a sports bra. You hadn’t known the comfort of clothes in so long, it had to have been at least 10 months of being naked. But you hadn’t looked at a calendar, you wouldn’t know until you were outside. 

The drive was slow, a warm palm on your thigh as he drove. Softly humming to the music that played, Christmas music. It made you want to sob, knowing that you had been trapped for almost a year. Not once even a hint at someone searching for you, it’s almost like you never existed. 

Kylo pulled into a parking lot, rounding the car and opening your door. He had made sure to child lock your side. You stepped out slowly, hugging your coat to yourself to shield from the winter cold. He slipped his hand into your own, lacing his fingers as he tugged you up the sidewalk. No words were shared, you were afraid you would scream for help if you opened your mouth. 

Warmth of a store filled you, finally raising your head to see where you were. He had taken you to a salon, buzzing with people. Happy and smiling women, grooming each other while gossiping about their husbands. Kylo tugged you again to the counter, mumbling to the receptionist that you had an appointment. She smiled at him, probably eye-fucking him as he leaned against it. Charming smile luring her into believing the two of you were a normal couple, that he didn’t keep you bound and gagged every moment he could. 

You were sitting in a chair, draped in the cloth. Kylo watching you like a predator from a chair beside you. Waiting to see if you would play along with him. 

“Oh honey,” your hairstylist gasped, attempting to rake her fingers through your knots. “Your poor hair! What kind of shampoo are you using?” 

Your mouth opened and closed, not knowing the answer to her question. You hadn’t known what soaps he used on you when you were rarely showered. It had been so long since you bought your own toiletries. Kylo butt in, “some old brand she's been using for years, we were hoping for some recommendations to help her.” He leaned forward and stared at you as he spoke, his hand finding yours under the cloth. “You see, my poor Angel has been feeling depressed lately.” He placed a kiss on your knuckle, “I have to beg her to take care of herself, so I want her to feel good today.” 

She nodded, awing at how thoughtful your ‘boyfriend’ was. She quickly ran through all the products you could use to revitalize your hair, Kylo nodded along. Telling her to add them to your bill, he didn’t care how much they cost. Even having one of the other ladies trim and paint your nails, black of course. By the end of it, you were exhausted from trying to keep up small talk, your throat burned at every lie you fed them. You hardly even noticed she had cut off so much of your hair. Leaving you with a long bob, hanging just below your jawline. Your hair was silky smooth, smelling of wealth. Kylo ran his fingers through it immediately, cupping your scalp in front of all the ladies. Whispering how beautiful you looked, everyone aweing at you both. Some of them even tearing up at the gesture. 

You teared up too, knowing that any moment he would take a shaver to your scalp. Just to take away the rewards if you were bad. 

The store was the same, he kept your hand locked in his own. Tugging you along aisles, letting you pick out anything you wanted. As long as you thanked him after each thing, pursing his lips at you. Giving you the opportunity to show how grateful you were for his generosity. 

After what felt like hours, you had finally checked out. Seeing the bill racking up in the thousands, he spared no expense for his precious Angel. You allowed your eyes to wander, looking at the faces of people walking by. Silently pleading for them to look at you, really look at you, to recognize the fear on your face. Someone had to know that you were missing, taken from your family home. But no one cared, seeing you with such a big man waiting on you hand and foot. The most recognition you got was from girls who sneered at you in jealousy. 

As you walked out, Kylo finally released your hand. Seeing that you had been loyal to your promise, you let out a sigh of relief. Being treated like a human instead of a dog was refreshing. You glanced at the walls of the store, spying the ads and posters for local businesses. A blue board caught your eye, letters in large print above photos. 

‘HAVE YOU SEEN ME?’ 

You gasped in horror, eyes zeroing in on your picture. The photo faded from months of posting, the image showing a happy girl. Your senior yearbook photo smiling back at you, your name in bold print along with the date you were reported missing. You sobbed, openly, as your eyes darted across the paper, realizing that you hadn’t even graduated like everyone else had. He had taken you, really taken you, you couldn’t ignore it anymore. You were just a high school senior, barely 18, and was kidnapped by a man not even 2 feet from you. His arms began wrapping around you, caging you in as he rocked you back and forth. Whispering into your hair, “I know, it’s so sad…”

Kylo’s lips pressed into your hair, inhaling the present scent. “Some of these poor people have never been found.” 

\----- 

As promised he took you to dinner, allowing you to pick out whatever you wanted. Watching you as you tried to be as gracious as possible, not making a scene when the food hit your palette. You had been without true sustenance for so long, just the smell was enough to fill you. He ate in silence, almost egging you to do something to show you were a hostage to the people sitting around the both of you. 

You had finished your meal, taking a small sip of water before clearing your throat. His eyebrows raised at the sound, slowly chewing the rest of his burger while he waited. “I need to know something.” 

He swallowed, “And what is that something, sweetheart.” 

“I-well-how,” you quieted as the waitress set down your check-in front of him. Not speaking until she was gone, “How...how old are you Kylo?” 

He leaned back, chewing his cheek as he chuckled at you. Folding his arms across his chest as he thought. You just needed to know, to understand who this man was who sat across from you. Now the only human you saw day in and out, and you knew nothing of him. 

“I’m 27. My birthday was last month, the 19th.” 

Tears filled your eyes, registering the gravity of his words. Not only was he almost 10 years your senior, but he thought it appropriate to take a girl just on the cusp of womanhood as his partner. 

A true predator. 

\-----

You stumbled into the house, exhausted from being paraded around town. It was the first time you had been out in a while, and you were hoping he was feeling generous enough to let you pass out in the bed instead of the basement. 

Kylo set all the bags on the kitchen table, placing out your new toiletries in front of you. He handed them to you one by one, mumbling for you to put them in the bathroom. You nodded, moving towards the basement door to bring them to the one you used normally. Kylo snapped at you, “What are you doing?” 

You stared at him wide-eyed, whispering at him, “I’m putting these away… like you told me to, I-I was just listening to you.” 

“Really?” he scolded you, “You’re going to cry after everything I did for you today?” 

“No, I just-.” 

“Go put them in our bathroom, you stupid girl.” 

Our bathroom, that was a first. Sharing something of his own with you was weird. But you obeyed, setting your stuff in the shower. Placing your new toothbrush, makeup, hairbrush, and face wash on ‘your’ side of the double vanity. Your bath bombs nestled in a small basket he allowed you to get, as long as it matched the dark tones of the house. 

You stood in the mirror and studied your face. It was slimmer than you remembered, cheeks hollow and jutting through your skin. Your eyes were sunken, while also looking too large for your face. You had lost so much weight, your sweet chubby cheeks and dimples melted away into a husk before you. You brought your fingers up to trace your features, memorize the new lines of your face. Skimming over your overly pouty lips, the ones that would wrap around his cock whenever he wanted. Split open from brute force, blood seeping down your neck and clavicle. 

“Would you like to lay down with me?” 

You turned towards his voice, his body leaning against the door frame. He was shirtless, pajama bottoms hanging low on his waist. In his hands was a black nightgown, silk shimmering in the dim light of the bathroom. You nodded softly stepping towards him and pulling the garment from his hands. But he didn’t let go, shaking his head with a smile. Pushing you back into the bathroom, forcing you to the flush against the counter. He set it down next to you, hands now dancing across your torso. Pinching into your ribs, pulling a squeak as he applied more and more pressure, threatening to snap one at any moment. 

He exhaled hotly on your face, lips pressing against your own. He tasted so good, like rich dark chocolate, intoxicating. Your eyes fell shut as you basked in the tenderness, kissing him back with the same vigor. Earning soft moans from him as well, you placed your hands on his bare shoulders. Manicured nails scratching him like a cat, Kylo pulled away. Placing his forehead against yours as he whispered softly, “You know I love you right?” 

You squeezed your eyes shut, bottom lip trembling at his words. Head softly shaking from side to side in protest. Kylo leaned into you again, pulling you flush with his body. Your hips bumping into one another, his erection pressing into your abdomen. “Don’t you see it? How I saved you? How I take care of you?” 

Silence. 

“Answer me.” he growled. Hands binding into you in anger. 

You sobbed, pushing yourself away from his embrace. “How can you say that Kylo? I don’t understand,” your voice began to raise, lungs burning as you screeched, “You don’t even know what love is!” 

Kylo snapped, teeth bared at you as he threw you to the floor. Slamming you on the tile, crushing your skull with his foot as he yelled, “Don’t you ever fucking talk to me like that. You’re nothing. And if that’s how you want to be treated then I can wholeheartedly deliver it.” 

He dragged you by the hair out of the bathroom, hiring you to the foot of the bed. You jaw slamming into the metal post, tears flowing as you felt the crunch of your bones. Kylo’s hands were ripping your clothes off, nails being sure to dig into the flesh hard enough to draw blood. You wailed, kicking and screaming at him to stop, begging for him to not hurt you anymore. But he didn’t, slamming you repeatedly into the bedframe. Making sure to make your face crumble, your jaw broken, mouth wide as he finally flipped you around. 

His cock was out, painfully hard as he watched you choke on your own blood. Yanking your mouth towards him, forcing his cock down your throat. Gurgling around him as you sobbed, pounding your fists against him. All while he fucked you, moaning above you what a good whore you were. How he loved seeing his cock covered in your blood, it made him feel so powerful. After ten minutes of brutal face fucking, he shoved his cock as far as it could go, crushing your nose against his public bone. It was broken too, bleeding over him as he came down your throat. 

He tore you off as you threw up his cum, flipping you onto your stomach. “If you get blood on my carpet I’ll break more than your jaw.” You raised your face from it, feeble arms holding your weight off the ground. You didn’t want to suffer more, begging again for mercy. “I know you love me please Kylo please stop! I’m sorry!” 

“Why are you sorry whore?” 

Kylo kicked your legs apart, kneeling behind you. Spitting on his palm before shoving three fingers into your asshole. Causing you to scream in pain, clenching around him as he worked them inside you, “Fucking tell me you ungrateful pig!” 

“I’m sorry! I love you, please it hurts Kylo!” 

“I know it does,” he fucked his dry fingers inside you more. Slamming his knuckles into you with such force to throw you flush with the ground. You jaw hitting it over and over, gargling on your blood once again. “Get your hands back here and open your slutty asshole for me.” 

You sobbed, hands shakily opening yourself up for him. Trying your best to please him, you felt his cock head push into you. Wailing at the burn, you weren’t wet enough. He was going to tear you, you screamed at him. “No please please, you can’t-.”

“Who are you to tell me what I can’t do? Hmm?” he thrust inside you, cock buried inside you. Kylo sucked a breath through his teeth, “Fuck-you’re gonna snap my dick off.” He pulled out slowly, gasping as you clenched around him. Bruising him as he moved, “Too fuckin’ tight,” he gasped again. Suddenly he was back inside you, pumping inside you deeper and deeper. Leaning over you, balancing on his left arm while he reached over you. “Since you won’t stop crying,” he fumbled with the nightstand drawer. Pulling out a small bottle, leaning back to watch his cock be swallowed by you. The cap opened, cold liquid squirting over the portion of his cock outside of you. Stinging into your skin, his fingers poking it inside your ring as he began his thrusts again. Soon both of you were moaning, Kylos hands slamming his hips into your ass. Pulling cries from your lungs, his cock pleasuring you over and over. Unable to keep yourself under control, you sobbed for him, “Please-oh my god-FUCK, don’t stop,” you heaved, bouncing your hips into his own. Pulling a dark laugh behind you, he loved when you begged, when you wanted him inside you. 

“Tell me you love my cock,” he growled, head thrown back in pleasure. Snapping into you over and over, “Tell me, or you don’t get to cum.” 

You choked, pushing up on your arms and glancing behind you. Blood still pouring out your mouth as you pleaded, “I love your cock Kylo, please don’t take it away. I need it, need you.” 

He groaned, finger running down to praise your clit. Asshole tightening around him as you hurled towards your orgasm. “I’m gonna fill you up, stuff you with my cum. Do you want your master’s cum?” 

“Yes!” 

Kylo roared, pinching your clit to push you to cum. Both of you screaming in bliss, clenching around him as his cock spurted inside you. Hot cum pouring, he fucked you both through it, whimpering at the overstimulation. You weeped, crumbling to the floor and pulling away from him, cock falling out with a pop. Feeling his cum slowly seep out of you, you heard him get up. Walking away from you to the bathroom, the faucet turning on and off. A yawn filling the air between your pained breathing. 

He squatted next to you, yanking your face off the floor by your hair. His dark eyes assessing the damage he caused. He hummed and dropped you back to the floor, walking away from you, “Don’t even think about getting on the bed. You don’t deserve it.” 

\-----

A cupcake was placed in front of you, a small candle sticking out of it. A small box next to it, black bow atop it. 

Kylo sat across from you, watching as the wax melted into the frosting. Your bottom lip trembled as you realized the meaning. 

“Aren’t you going to make a wish my love?” 

You wiped away stray tears, taking a deep breath. Your lips pursed, blowing out the candle, watching as he smiled at you. 

“Happy birthday.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> year one done!


	4. The Second Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A cool breeze nipped at your exposed legs, causing goosebumps to erupt over your skin. You were curled into your comforter, comfy and safe, your cheek pressed against your pillow. Lips pursed and a small amount of drool seeping into the fabric. A creak came from the corner of your room, slightly rousing you from your slumber. You glanced around, your drooping eyelids barely taking in the scene. In your sleep riddled state, you didn't see him, his large figure stalking towards you. The whites of his eyes shining in the moonlight, it wasn't until you felt a palm slide up your side. Following the natural contours of your body, the warmth emanating from it lulling you to sleep once again. A dip in the mattress, the springs creaking under the weight. 
> 
> Hot breath fanned over your neck, soft lips pressing onto the back of your ear. A deep hum filling your senses, you sighed. Cuddling back into the figure, wanting to get closer to the warm entity. A low chuckle sounded behind you, and then... 
> 
> Nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW/CW: This is dark shit, like explicitly horrible shit happens in this. However, I enjoy reading dark fics, and I super loved Stalker Clyde by @clumsycopy & was inspired by the oneshot EOS by @thetorturerwrites and I wanted to write something with the sameish tone for Halloween. NSFW, Violence, Murder, Non-con elements, Domestic Violence, Surgery, Explicit sex, oral sex, anal sex, sex toys, waterboarding, forced feeding, Animal abuse (just a brief mention, I do not go into any detail).

_“I don’t think you need that,” Kylos voice rang from the kitchen, footsteps to follow. You pushed away the iPad that was sitting on your lap and folded your hands together. His hand came up to push a strand of hair behind your ear as he placed a kiss on your forehead, “You know better than to shop without my permission.”_

_You nodded, rubbing your cheek into his palm as you batted your eyelashes at him, “But Daddy, I wanted to get you a present.”_

_“Oh my love,” he took a deep breath, “You’re the only present I’ll ever need.”_

\----

You woke up in a cold sweat, hair plastered to your forehead as you gasped for air. Tears spilling down your cheeks as you let out a scream, you could feel his hands on you still. Blunt nails digging into your legs as they dragged up and down the length, teeth sinking into your shoulders as you struggled to get out of his grasp. 

Snatching your phone from the bedside table you dialed Finn, shaking as you waited for him to pick up. 

“Hello?” 

“Finn,” you choked, “I’m so sorry to wake you-I-just had a nightmare and-and…” 

You heard rustling on the line, “No no it’s okay (Y/N), just breathe. Did you want to come over? Poe is sleeping right now but we have a spare bed.” 

“Yeah,” you whispered, “I’m sorry-you were right-I shouldn’t have come back here.” 

“It’s fine, just come over.” 

The line went dead, leaving you alone in your bed. Black silk sheets caressing your body. Just like they used to, it was almost like he was next to you again. Limbs intertwining with your own in the middle of the night. You took a deep breath, slowly reaching out to touch the pillow to your left. You could still see the indent of his head, if you tried hard enough you could still smell the scent of his shampoo. 

You flew out of the bed, feet sliding on the hardwood. New hardwood, since you had soiled the old carpet countless times before that. He had gotten tired of your mess, the messes he inflicted on you, and ripped it all out. Forcing you to walk on the uneven cement flooring beneath, commanding you to crawl on your hands and knees as punishment. 

“If you had just been a good girl and not fucked up our bedroom like a dog, I wouldn’t be forced to discipline you like this.” 

You could feel the scrapes and bruises on your knees as you walked over to your duffle bag. Dressing yourself in sweatpants and a large hoodie, a souvenir he had given you when you were cold in the basement. You thought about throwing it away, burning it in the remains of your life, but you couldn’t do it. 

It was the first kindness he had given you. 

The drive to Finn and Poes was quiet, you didn’t know how to change the radio stations and honestly, music made you sick. Songs about love and happiness between others made your blood boil, why did they get a normal and healthy partner? Why out of everyone in the world, why did you have to get kidnapped by a homicidal maniac? And now you had to sift through the remains of your life, a waking nightmare, while he sat in a prison cell awaiting his judgment that you inflicted on him. 

Finn was waiting on the front porch for you, wrapped in a blanket. The warm light flooding his frame from inside, his home full of happy memories and love. His husband sleeping soundly inside, unaware of the tornado Finn had invited to their sanctuary. You parked on the sidewalk, watching as the first snowfall of the year began to paint the windshield. Taking a deep breath as you gently shut the door and rounded the vehicle towards the walkway. 

“You didn’t need to wait out here for me, it’s so cold outside.” 

Finn shook his head, placing a hand on your shoulder, “(Y/N) it’s okay, I wanted to make sure you would come.” You nodded, standing in the soft light. Looking out to the street as the snow began to fall harder, each snowflake unceremoniously blanketing the skyline. Finn cleared his throat next to you, “You drove Ren’s car?” 

“Yeah,” your eyes flashed to the Porsche, black paint disappearing into the white snow. “I don’t know where he hid the keys to the other car. He never let me drive this one, I’ve only ridden in it once before,” you let out a sad chuckle, “He would kill me if he knew I drove it without his permission.” 

Finn said nothing, just gesturing to you inside the home. Letting you plop down on the couch as he draped a blanket over your form. Their German shepherd settling next to you, his face buried into your lap. You smiled, rubbing his muzzle as he sighed into you. “BB really likes you,” Finn mumbled, he had taken a seat across from you, next to the fireplace. 

“Most dogs like me, I’m not sure why though.” 

“They are good therapy for people,” Finn offered, “Have you thought about getting a dog?” 

You stopped petting BB, mind reeling back to the only pet you had in your life. A small black kitten, about a year old when you were given him. He was so sweet and loveable, purring in your lap as he perched on the couch. His deep gray eyes dug into your soul, the only comfort you felt in the perpetual silence that was your life. Never once biting or clawing you, he was truly the best cat you had ever met. He had loved you more than anything, protective and territorial of you above all else. 

Ren hated it, hated that the animal was responsible for your happiness. Even though he was the one who had gotten him for you, he tried so hard to drive a wedge between the two of you. One day he must've had enough, you had been locked in the basement all day. Deprived of food and water, punishment for retaliation to one of Ren’s beatings. You had smacked him after he tried to force himself onto you. He had thrown the cat from your lap, causing it to hurt itself when landing. You wailed underneath him, begging for him to let you go so you could help the poor animal. 

“You love that stupid thing more than me!” 

He had opened the door, lumbering down the stairs with your precious companion in his hands. Holding him by the scruff of his neck, the poor animal's eyes wide in fear as it cried for help. You sobbed, eyes darting between the animal and Rens deadly stare. “Please Kylo, he didn’t do anything wrong, just put him down.” 

“Please.” 

_SNAP_

BB whined in your lap, pulling you back into reality. You resumed your petting, vacant eyes staring into the fire. Footsteps came from the hallway, drawing everyone's attention. “Finny why are you up-oh,” Poe came around the couch, his deep comforting eyes boring into you. “I didn’t know you were coming over, do you want some tea?” 

You shook your head, prompting Poe to sit on the arm of the chair Finn was seated in. “Everything okay?” 

“She just had a nightmare, I said she could come over.” 

Poe nodded, rubbing his chin in thought. “Probably just anxiety about the trial continuing tomorrow, how have you been doing with all of this?” 

“I-I’m fine,” you offered a tight-lipped smile. 

He laughed, “Oh come on, don’t lie. How could you be okay? The man that raped and abused you sits not even 10 feet away from you! The discovery alone from the last testimony was enough to make it look like you lied about half the abuse.” 

“Poe,” Finn growled. 

“And now, you’re living in the house you shared with him. I can even see his car on our street. What would happen if the defense saw that? I’m surprised the judge hasn’t thrown the case out.” 

“Poe.” 

“What? I’m just stating the obvious, she deserves to know what's going on,” Poe looked over at you, “You aren’t a child anymore, I don’t know why they aren’t telling you.” 

“I know it looks like that but I’m telling the truth,” you squeaked out. 

“Sweetie,” Poe sighed, getting up and sitting next to you, draping an arm around your back, “I know you are, but it doesn’t look like it unless you can find some evidence of the crimes. I mean there's not one ER visit documenting you coming in for your various injuries. And you said he broke your jaw once, what did he do? Just wire it shut himself?” 

\----- 

It was unlocked, you had double-checked it. 

Rushing up and down the stairs in a panic as you touched the knob. The cool metal burning you as you twisted it, expecting it to stall halfway through like it did the day before. But not today, it clicked open. Revealing the kitchen breakfast nook. Air stale, the sunlight falling through the drawn curtains showing the dust floating in the air. 

You quickly ran back down the stairs, folding into a ball on the mattress. Waiting for the telltale sound of his boots hitting the hardwood above you, but it never came. Instead, you just heard the heat kick in, hot air rushing through the pipes in the ceiling and filling the upstairs. You could've sworn you heard him leave for work today, by all means, it was a Monday. Yesterday you had your ‘Sunday Family dinner’ where the two of you sit silently at the dinner table while he tells you about the week he has planned. But you never say anything, he doesn’t let you eat anyway. Just lets you watch him shovel food down his throat. Sweating in your chair as you whine through the stitches, hands coming up to scratch at the taped tube to your cheek. 

“Stoppit, or you’ll rip it out again.” 

You dropped your hands into your lap, straightening your back the way he likes it. If you are good, he will feed you a slurry of his dinner. It looks so delicious, steak, veggies, mashed potatoes. Freshly bought from the farmers market he brought you to the day before, you were so happy to breathe the fresh air. 

Even though it was just through one nostril, you can’t breathe through your mouth. Not since he broke your jaw, and reset it himself. He said that he couldn’t afford to take you to a surgeon, which you knew was a lie. Ren instead called a friend over, who helped pin you inside the tub and numb your jaw and surrounding areas as he stitched and wired everything shut. Forcing the feeding tube through your nostril and down your throat, causing you to retch in your mouth. But you couldn’t evacuate it, having to just swallow it down and sob through the stitches. 

His friend was just as cruel as he was, briefly mentioning that his name started with a V or a C, you couldn’t catch it through your screams. He left after shaking Ren’s hand as they talked about work the following week. 

You stepped back up the stairs, seeing the door still wide open. Inviting you to walk out, maybe if this door was unlocked… maybe the others would be too. 

Without a second thought, you rushed out the door, running into Ren’s bedroom. Throwing open the closet and ripping open the bag of your clothes, he kept them hidden from you. He preferred you naked when he was home, it degraded you into being below him. You pulled on your leggings, socks, bra, and a dark hoodie. Threading your arms through a heavy winter coat, you caught a glimpse of yourself in the far bedroom mirror. 

You looked awful, your hair had grown past your collarbone. Ratted and greasy, your face stained with tears and snot. Blood seeping from your stitches, wires catching on strands of hair. You felt like sobbing, but couldn't, instead running to the bathroom and throwing your hair in a bun. Wiping off the remaining blood as carefully as possible, careful to not disturb the feeding tube or the stitches. Once you were satisfied you left the bedroom, sliding on your winter boots and heading for the front door. 

Stopping yourself inches from the knob, you realized that even if you got out. You couldn’t tell anyone who you were, you couldn't speak. Spinning on your heels you dashed to the kitchen, pulling out a notebook from the junk drawer and scrawling out a message to hand to the first person you saw. 

_Please help me. My name is (Y/F/N) (Y/L/N) I’ve been kept in Kylo Ren’s basement for over a year. I was taken from my home last spring, please help me. I need to go to the hospital._

Satisfied with your letter, you decided that the backdoor would be better for escape. He wouldn’t be able to see if the sliding door was disturbed as easily as the front door. You slammed the basement door shut as you approached the back. Shaking hands clicked the latch on the glass, the suction dissipating and revealing the outside world. You took a deep breath, boots stepping onto the back patio. Still covered in the morning frost from the chilly evening prior, you slid the backdoor shut again. Careful to not leave any smudges on the glass before turning around. 

Ren’s backyard was bigger than your family’s, a significant porch lined most of it. There was a grill and some tables, even a hot tub. Why he had all these things you had no clue, he wasn’t an entertainer. Unless his guests enjoyed torturing other humans, then yes he was an amazing party host. 

You ran to the side yard, hugging the house in case he had cameras on the perimeter. The back gate was latched shut but it only took a few kicks to get it loose, revealing the front yard and sidewalk. The houses surrounding his were suburban, family homes most likely. All of them under the guise that their quiet, reclusive neighbor was just that. Having no clue he kept a woman in his basement for safekeeping. 

Once on the sidewalk, you looked both ways, spying no vehicles before dashing across. You thought about knocking on the neighbor’s doors, but you weren’t sure you could trust them. You didn’t know how long they had lived there or if they knew Ren personally, it would be safer to get out of the area and maybe find something familiar. 

Your school. 

Yes, you thought, your school would be the perfect place. Your old teachers would surely recognize you, the senior who disappeared. You began running, taking back alleyways towards the general direction you thought it would be. Honestly, you had zero clue where Ren’s house was. The only times you had been in the car was to go shopping and you were too anxious to notice where he was about your city. But he used to buy coffee at your old work, so he had to be close to it. 

After about an hour of running, you found yourself across the corner to your school. Breathing heavily through your nose, swallowing down the saliva that couldn’t seep through your wounds. By the looks of it, it was just about 6th period, which meant that people were inside. 

You cried as you pulled on the front doors, opening like they had been waiting for you your entire life. Watching as students bustled inside, struggling to get to their next classroom, unaware of the torture and pain that was approaching them. You whined as they pushed past you, shoving you from side to side, you grasped a small girl. Shaking her shoulders as you tried to scream through the stitches. 

She burst into tears, screaming at you to let her go. Now everyone was staring, cameras coming out pointing at the monster holding the girl. You looked like you were trying to kidnap her, but you didn’t stop, wrapping your hand around her mouth and pleading with your eyes. Trying to convey that you weren’t the danger. 

You were in danger. 

Rough hands found your shoulders, dragging you away from the scene. You kicked and screamed at the aggressive movements. You knew it was him, it had to be, you hadn’t gotten away. You were still asleep in the basement, passed out from your previous beating. 

You squeezed your eyes shut and curled into a ball, allowing yourself to be dragged across the linoleum. Muffled voices ringing in your ears as you came to, you opened your eyes, met with harsh fluorescent lights. 

“I don’t know who she is, we don’t have a student who has these injuries.” 

“She looks malnourished, should we call the police?” 

“She’s probably a homeless person, I told you we should lock the doors. Anyone can just walk in from the street.” 

You slowly sat up, the creaking chair drawing their attention back to you. Around you were your old principal, front desk receptionist, and Security officer of your high school. You let out a whine of relief, they would surely help you. They knew you! You were one of their favorite students! 

“What if she’s violent, poor Cindy had to go home after she got a hold of her,” the receptionist whispered to the principal. You raised your hands, trying to get them to look at you. But your wrists were zip-tied together, the sensation instantly making you burst into tears. No, no, you thought, I’m not a threat. Let me just grab my note, then you’ll know who I am! 

“I think we should call the city, they will know what to do with her.” 

You waited, zip-tied now to a chair in the SRO’s office. He had just gotten off the phone with someone to come pick you up. You stared at him, not recognizing him as the same officer you remembered from school. Mr. Call was the old one, he was sweet, chubby and wholeheartedly the worst cop you had met. Not one student at your school was given a citation for having weed under him, but this man was much different. 

He was big, almost as big as Ren. With bright blue eyes, piercing your soul, you kinda thought you recognized him. But you weren’t sure where from, he just sat there and stared at you. Feet planted on the ground. Manspreading his knees so you had nowhere to run if you could. He took a deep breath, briefly looking at his phone before getting out of his chair and leaving the room. 

Once he was gone you sat there idly. You didn’t know who was coming, but you knew it would be far from Ren. They would hopefully take you to a doctor, lord knows you needed it. You let yourself become immersed in the decorations of the officer’s desk. Pictures from students and possible family members littered the workspace. Everyone was smiling and laughing, there was even a photo of a group of men. 

They couldn’t have been much older than 25, maybe they were his college buddies. Even from where you were sitting you noticed that all of them were in black. Not uniform black, but all in black, they were all relatively the same build. Some of them shorter than the others, some had long hair, some extremely pale. 

You looked away from the photo, eyes settling on another. Just three men, one of them in a police uniform. The other two holding champagne bottles and smiling must be his graduation picture or something. You squinted at the men, noticing a familiar set of shoulders. Dark black hair sitting on them, pink plush lips adorning a long roman face. 

Your head snapped back to the group picture, zeroing in on the center man. Immediately you felt ill, staring back at you was him. 

The door creaked open again, your principal coming in followed by the SRO officer. You were trembling, this man knew Ren, did he know you? Was the ring of men in the photo all in on his kidnapping? Was your school in on it too? You began to cry as your principal sank to her knees in front of you. 

“Hi sweetie, I know you don’t know me but my name is Mrs. Netal. I’m the principal here.” She took a deep breath, cringing at your tears and snot running into your stitches, “You seem to be in bad shape, but our trusty officer Vicrul has so graciously called someone who can help you.” 

She turned to the man, who stepped out of the way and allowed another man to step forward. 

“And he’s here to help you, isn’t that right Mr. Solo?” 

“Oh, I couldn’t agree more.” 

\-----

You were walking out of the school in slow succession. Ren was behind you, your arms zip-tied together, advice from our dear friend Vicrul. He had his left hand snaked around your wrists, digging the binding deeper into your skin as he pushed you. You took the time to think about what was happening, you were being handed off to the very man who had owned you for the last year. No one had tried to help you, and he was surely going to kill you now. 

Ren escorted you out to his car, panicking as you got closer to it. You weren’t allowed near it, or even in the garage. But you had seen it before, the day he gave you a tour of your new home. But you didn’t want to get in it, beginning to kick and attempt to scream for someone, anyone, to help you. All the school administrators had swarmed, wanting to see the commotion and bask in the celebrity that was ‘Ben Solo’. 

He tore the front door open, hand moving to the back of your head to duck you inside. You thought it was either now or never. Kicking your legs to slam into the sides of the door, using all your strength to push back hard into Ren. Momentarily knocking the wind from his chest, sputtering at you, and every so slightly releasing his grip. 

You ran. 

Long strides down the sidewalk, people behind you had yelled for you to stop. Some of them were heading down the stairs to reason but not quick enough. Almost to the end of the block when you heard him, “(Y/N)! Stop right now!” 

You froze immediately, listening for his breathing zeroing in on you. But it didn’t come, leaving you petrified for what was to come. 

Something cocked behind you. 

A small pause. 

_“No, don’t shoot!”_

\----- 

You lurched out of the bathtub, filled to the brim with ice cubes and freezing water. Screaming as loud as you could, the sound falling foreign to your own ears. Hands flying to your face, you felt for the stitches, wires, tube, all of it was gone. Fingertips padding on the scar tissue and drying blood clots that had arisen from the extraction. 

Legs wobbling as they lifted you from the tub, sloshing more bone-chilling water onto your frail legs. Hissing when your toes touched the floor, teeth chattering as you were free. You glanced around, trying to see where you were, but found that you couldn’t see very well. It was almost like you had a film over your eyes, unable to just blink whatever it was. 

The more you tried to open them, the more you realized you couldn't even blink normally. Your eyelids sticking shut the more you tried, leaving you with just a sliver of vision. 

“Their glued shut love, you wouldn’t have wanted to see me resetting your law. It was better this way.” 

“K-k-ky-kylo,” you sobbed, hands digging into your face to try and pry open your eyes. 

“You’ll want to keep them shut unless you want to see me punishing you.” 

You shook your head wildly, whimpering as you ran your hands along your jaw. Trying to imagine what you looked like, the scars felt healed aside from the gashes on the upper and lower corner of your jaw. 

His footsteps approached you, warm palms skating up and down your arms. You melted into him, it felt so warm and safe, oblivious to the pain that was about to ensue because of your escape. Ren hummed at your cuddling, placing soft kisses to your forehead as he shushed your whimpers. You felt his hands moving to cradle into his chest, cooed in your ear, “Why’d you run love?” 

You froze, voice barely a whisper, “I don’t want to be here Kylo.” 

“Mm.” 

You felt the slap before you heard it, rocking your off-balance and slamming against the tub. Jaw screaming in pain from the freshly healed wounds, scrambling to huddle in a ball on the floor. “Please, Kylo!” you cried out, “I can’t be here anymore, please just let me go!” 

“I expected better from you,” he growled, kicking you in the gut, “But you beg like a worthless animal. Just like the rest of them.” 

He kicked you again. 

“They all expect to be spared.” 

He pinned your legs to the ground, leaving you more exposed to his abuse.

“Begging for God to save them, for mercy, to stop the pain.” 

You sobbed, spitting up blood after each repeated blow. 

“ _Where the fuck is your God now?”_

Ren wrenched you from the ground, shoving your face-first into the ice bath and pinning your cheek to the bottom. You were thrashing and flailing for release, choking in water with each scream. He wasn’t even hitting you, just keeping you under for as long as he could without killing you. Pulling you free, followed by repeated punching to your gut to make you regurgitate the water. Ren threw you back into the water three more times before he was satisfied with your screams. 

Hauling you to the floor and pinning you down with a knee into your chest. His pocket knife coming up to your neck, digging in a line through the muscles. Drawing screams to pour out along with your blood. “Keep your mouth shut, or else you’ll bleed faster. You did this to yourself.” 

You couldn’t see him above you, digging his bare hand into your muscle and shoving something foreign inside it. Grunting as he appreciated his handiwork, stitches soon to follow. You were afraid to move your neck, the area singing with immense pain. Blood still trying to seep through the fresh wound. He roughly picked you up, sitting you on the counter. A hand wrapping around your throat, fingers digging into the incision. “This will only hurt more if you struggle.” 

Rens finger gripped your lash line, painfully ripping the dried glue from your eye like it was duct tape. You screamed as some of your eyelashes were plucked out, hands grasping around his wrist to try and pull him away. He hissed at you to stop, ripping the second one with little remorse. You quickly tore your eyes open, blurry at first, but then you were able to zero in on his face. Stiff with anger, his neck vein bulging out and eye twitching as he took deep breaths. You spun as much as you could, gasping when you saw your blood-stained neck, your scarred jaw, and your bloodshot eyes. 

“You-you’re ruining my face Kylo! Why are you doing this?” 

He smiled behind you, hand grasping your jaw and stroking your cheek with his thumb, “If you don’t behave I won’t give you anything to make the pain go away. You’ll just have to sit and suffer.” 

You spun around, hands digging into his shoulders as you cried, “What do you mean? Please I’ll be good.” 

“I’m sure you will be,” he cooed, “Now, get on all fours and crawl to the bedroom.” 

Knees cracking onto the floor as you feel, shamelessly scrambling into the room, Ren kicked your back to force you to arch harder for him. You made it to the foot of the bed and sat obediently on your heels, waiting for the next instruction. 

“Climb up slut,” he spat. “Facedown.” 

“Yes, sir.” 

You fell to the bed, face to the side so you could breathe, trying to arch enough for his pleasure. He stalked over towards you, humming in approval at your stance, a warm palm skating over your arched back. Cupping a cheek before slipping between your legs, dipping a finger to swipe between your lips. “How agreeable you become when you get a reward, am I not reward enough for you, my love?” 

You said nothing, trying to keep still for him. 

“Answer me, slut,” he growled, landing a firm smack to your cheeks. 

“Yes, you are! I’m sorry!” 

“Oh? Am I?” 

A series of sharp smacks landed in quick succession, wailing at each blow as he hit the same spots harder and harder. “Are you ever going to try to run again?”

“No!” 

“Are you going to quit being a difficult bitch?” 

“Yes-yes!” 

“Are you going to start listening to me?” 

“YES!” 

Heavy breathing came from behind you, Ren climbed onto the bed behind you. Something rattling in his pocket as he stripped down. He pulled an orange pills bottle from his pants, revealing two and placing them on your lips. “Say thank you.” 

You opened your mouth without hesitation, letting him shove it down your throat with his fingers. Spitting down as the only sustenance to swallow, “Thank You-Thank You-Thank You.” 

Ren smacked both hands down onto your hips, spreading and spitting on you as the drugs flowing through your veins. Your body numb as you fell deeper and deeper into a dreamy spell, not feeling his rough hands yanking your ankles apart to allow his frame. His hard cock pushing into your pussy, the stretch pure bliss to your singing muscles. You immediately bucked into him, wanting to chase the high he had given you. 

You would do anything for more, to stop the pain ripping through your neck. 

“Look at you, whoring yourself out for a fucking pill,” Ren snarled, hips picking up the pace, “You’d let me do anything to you right now, wouldn’t you?” 

“Yes-yes yes-anything Kylo.” 

“Such a good girl,” he spanked you, “Taking anything I give you.” Ren fucked harder into you, hand-pressed your face into the mattress. Restricting your airways as he pounded, but you didn’t care, “Are you going to cum love? I can feel you squeezing me tighter.” 

You tried to nod, sobbing out in pleasure as his hand fell to circle your clit, pure euphoria pouring out of your veins. Hurling you towards your climax without any warning, you creamed all over his cock as it tore through you. 

“Jesus-fuck, you soaked the bed,” Ren moaned, “Gonna fill up your cunt, keep it stuffed with my cum.” 

“Please Kylo,” you whined, body shaking from your orgasm as it washed over you in harsh waves. 

“Say it (Y/N), tell me you love me.” 

You choked, unable to stop yourself from rocking into his body. Needing to feel the pleasure he gave you over and over, you couldn’t risk him taking away this new reward. You would do anything. 

“I love you!” 

\-----

“Where are you, love?” 

You ran from the kitchen, smiling at Ren as he walked through the front door. Being sure to wrap your arms around him and kiss his cheek. He loved it when you greeted him, but you could only do it when you had been good. Not upsetting him, following the rules, making sure to praise him for giving you anything he asked for. Kissing him from the toe of his boot, all the way to his crown. He loved it when you were good, praising you with sweet words and gifts. 

But they never lasted long. 

Today when you greeted him it felt different. 

He was not happy to see you, his brow covered in sweat and furrowed in anger. Nostrils flared as he tore off his jacket in his haste, once you tried to kiss him he shoved you away. Landing on the floor, directly on your already bruised tailbone. Ren collapsed into his armchair, sighing as he rubbed his temples, “Go get me the bottle of whiskey, and take off my boots.” 

You obediently ran for his request, setting it on the nearby table and dropping to your knees. Unlacing his dark boots and sliding them off his big feet, softly massaging the arch of each foot as you did it. Earning a hum of approval from above, Ren took a deep drink before he spoke. 

“I have something to do tonight, and you’re going to come with me.” 

“Okay,” you whispered, continuing your massaging up his calves. 

Ren rested a heavy foot on your stomach, pressing you away from his leg so you would look at him. “I am taking you somewhere, and I need you to understand that under no circumstance are you to stray from me.” 

You nodded. 

“Good, let’s shower.” 

He bathed you, dressed you, did your hair, made sure everything was perfect on you. Being sure to cover your bruised ribs and any other imperfections on your soft skin. He even shaved your legs, you weren’t allowed to have a shaver because he knew you would cut yourself if you had the chance. The dress he slipped you in was gorgeous, a one strapped velvet gown. A slit exposing your right leg and showcasing the designer shoes he placed on your freshly painted toes. You looked like his show pony, all done up to be paraded around town. 

Ren was dressed in a black suit, his hair styled more than he usually did but he looked incredibly handsome. It made your heart clench, knowing that a man this beautiful was such a monster. Unable to be trusted when at any moment something would set him off. He stretched his hands out to yours, rubbing his thumbs across your knuckles before kissing them. 

“You look stunning,” he whispered, “Do you remember the rules?” 

You nodded, taking a deep breath before responding, “Yes sir, no straying from you, keep to myself, and do whatever you say.” 

“Good girl.” 

The drive was slow, Ren said nothing while you fidgeted in the front seat. Playing with a diamond bracelet he latched to your wrist, counting the diamonds that adjourned it. You hadn’t noticed the car stopping, Ren rounding the car and yanking your door open. You gave him a soft thank you as he yanked you out of the car, brushing your hair to the right side of your neck, “That scar isn’t healing well. Have you been messing with it?” 

You quickly shook your head, hand instinctively coming up to cup the healing incision. You had been fucking with it the moment he tore the bandages off of it, trying to pry the skin apart to fish out the tracker he placed there. But you were too afraid to hurt yourself more or be caught with your hand inside your throat. He would probably stitch the two together if you were caught. You were distracted by a valet, who smiled at the two of you as Ren gave him the car keys. His large palm on the small of your back as he guided you towards the front of the hotel. 

The lobby was beautiful, ornate, and glamorous. You haven't seen anything like it in your entire life, the air smelled of wealth. Flashes of light began to blind you, people screaming for Ben to smile for them, ‘who's the arm candy?’, ‘another girlfriend?’, ‘are you going to comment on the rumors about your recall Mr. Solo?’.

Ren pushed you forward, hissing in your ear as he moved, “Don’t say anything, just smile and wave. Remember if you so much as hesitate to anything I say, I will beat you black and blue.” 

“Yes, sir.” 

“Be sure to call me Ben while we are here.” 

He escorted you down a red carpet, cameras flashing again and again. Ren gave them a small smile, forcing his lips to turn upwards against his natural frown. Keeping an arm around you the entire time, he even made a show to kiss the top of your head for a picture. You didn’t understand what was happening, why was he letting people take pictures of you? Wouldn’t someone recognize you as a missing person? It seemed silly on his part to take you in the public eye, but he was too overwhelmed with the crowds to notice your discomfort. This was the most amount of people you had been around in almost two years. 

After the initial meet and greet you began to realize what was happening, whoever this Ben Solo was, was a politician. A governor to be exact, you began to recognize his face the more you stared at the billboards. However in the pictures, he had much shorter hair, and no scar across his face, but it was still him alright. You remembered when you were younger your father had mentioned something about him, “This young kid thinks he can do whatever he wants just because his mother was a senator, he doesn’t know anything about the people. He’s a wolf in sheep’s clothing.” 

“You’re the guy who ran for governor,” you whispered, Ren stiffened next to you. Humming as he reached for his drink at the table you both sat at. “I’m the man who became governor love.” 

“But you cheated, it was all over the news a few years ago.” 

“Hm,” he gave you a side-eye, “It’s not cheating if you are using the cards you been dealt, my love.” 

“I don’t understand why I’m here Kylo-Someones going to recognize me and then you’ll be thrown in prison.” 

Ren laughed, “You think you’re so smart, don’t you?” 

You stared at him in silence. 

“You really think people are looking for you? Some stupid young child, who disappeared two years ago? No one has tried my love, you’re completely alone. I am all you have, and I suggest you get used to it. I’m the only person who cares if you live or die, and you’re treading dangerously on that line.” 

The fundraiser lasted three hours before Ren began to wrap things up, people shook his hand, slapped his back. Gave him words of encouragement for the upcoming campaign, he barely paid attention to you. You had to go to the bathroom, slinking away from him to go take care of yourself. No one bothered you, just smiled at you or mentioned something about the governor like you weren’t his captive. As you walked back you recognized someone, a kid you went to school with. He was a few years older than you, graduated before you, but you were friends at one point. 

Making eye contact from across the room, you knew he instantly recognized you. Mouth dropping open in shock, he began to rush over to you. You looked around frantically, trying to see if Ren had seen you. This could be your chance to escape, you had to take it, you ran at him. Gasping as he got within earshot, “David!” 

_SLAM_

You woke up on the floor in the basement. Completely naked and hogtied, your eyes lazily opened to the dim light. In the center of the room was a man on a chair, blindfolded, bloody, bruised, barely breathing. His chest was bare, words scrawled in this skin, jagged and hemorrhaging blood. 

“I told you to follow my rules stupid girl.” 

Ren walked from a dark corner, ripping the blindfold off to reveal your friend David. Wailing from behind your gag as you watched him prowl around him, seeing David’s glassy eyes fill with tears as he took in your form. “You can’t get away from me if you try. Everyone you’ve ever loved will die. And you’re going to help me.” 

He ripped your gag out, snarling in your face. 

“You’re a monster!” 

Ren nodded, rounding David and wrapping his large hands around his head. Giving you a sinister smile before cracking his neck, letting him fall limp in the chair as you screamed. 

You sobbed for hours, as Ren forced you to watch him cut David into tiny pieces. Forcing you to help him shred the clothes from his back, taking apart his belongings, and burn them in the firepit. Along with all the remaining bits of flesh, the air reeked in the backyard, but it didn’t phase Ren, he watched with a smile on his face as you stared in horror. Pulling you into his lap and kissing your shoulders and neck, lips tracing over your incision as he whispered to you. 

“You’re just as guilty as I am now.” 

\-----

All of you were seated at the breakfast table, you had crashed on their couch after crying with them. Spilling your anxieties and fears, unable to shake the feeling that Ren was just around the corner. You didn’t want to go back to your home, it felt like a betrayal to your own freedom to sleep there. 

Poe and Finn had made breakfast, keeping the mood light and chipper. Asking you questions about jobs, or if you were thinking of going back to school after the trial was over, or if you had plans to leave the state. All of them seemed like great ideas, they were even willing to help you find schools in your budget. You were shoveling pancakes into your mouth, savoring the taste of each bite. Never would you take food for granted, not after knowing how long you could survive without it. 

You glanced over to your phone, after not looking at it all night you assumed you would have some emails or something. Luckily you had flipped it over to see an incoming call, an unknown number. You scrunch your forehead, “What the hell?” 

“Who is it?” Poe piped up, concern coloring his face as well as Finn’s. 

“Turn on speaker.” 

You pressed the green button, quickly flipping on the speakerphone as you waited for the person to speak. 

_Hello. This is a collect call from an inmate at Rebellion Federal Prison: **Kylo Ren**. Are you willing to accept the charges for this call? _

All of you stared at the phone, it was completely silent. Enough to hear a pin drop from the tension. Finn looked at you, taking a deep breath, “I can take it if you want.” 

“No,” Poe’s hand shot out, “He called for her, he might say something that will help the case.” 

You nodded, softly saying ‘accept’. 

The phone dialed. 

“Hello?” you whispered. 

“Ah, there you are my love.” 

Silence. 

“I was beginning to worry you didn’t want to hear from me.” 

You took a deep breath, “What do you want Kylo?” 

A tsk of his tongue, “Now now Angel, that's no way to speak to your husband. I thought you would be happy to hear from me.” He took a deep breath, “I wanted to speak with you, one on one. I know things have gotten...out of hand with the trial.” 

“And I know just as well as you, that you miss me.” 

Finn cocked a brow across from you, mouthing at you ‘what is he talking about?’. You waved your hand, not wanting to deal with them, and instead focus on Ren’s words. 

“I’ve heard from a little bird that you have been naughty.” 

You scoffed, “What are you talking about Kylo?” 

“You know exactly what I’m talking about. Breaking so many rules, just because you think you’re alone in our home.” 

Silence. 

“Using my belongings like they were your own, I can’t believe you would be so petty.” 

“How-how did you know I was staying at the house?” 

Finn motioned for you to hang up the phone, flailing his arms in the air to get you to stop talking. You couldn’t focus on him, your heart hammering in your chest, was he watching you? Having the house monitored or something? 

“Sweetheart, this call won’t last long enough if you don’t use your words like an adult. Now, here's what I need you to do. And I need you to verbally commit to doing exactly what I say, do you understand?” 

“Yes, sir.” 

“Good girl, you are going to go to my office. The key is in the garage, under my table. I need you to go in there and find me three things, you'll know them when you see them.”

“Butt-butt I’m not allowed in there,” you shakily whispered, body trembling as you thought about that room. 

“I know baby,” Ren cooed, “But just this once, you may go in there my love. Once you have it come to the prison.” 

Finn jumped up, reaching for the phone as fast as he could. Snatching it away from you as he prepared to lash out at Ren before he was cut off… 

“Be here tomorrow at noon, and I expect you to come alone.” 

_*Click*_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bad man, bad plan bby.   
> follow me on tumblr for my other writing that's not on Ao3! @ https://maybe-your-left.tumblr.com/


	5. Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A cool breeze nipped at your exposed legs, causing goosebumps to erupt over your skin. You were curled into your comforter, comfy and safe, your cheek pressed against your pillow. Lips pursed and a small amount of drool seeping into the fabric. A creak came from the corner of your room, slightly rousing you from your slumber. You glanced around, your drooping eyelids barely taking in the scene. In your sleep riddled state, you didn’t see him, his large figure stalking towards you. The whites of his eyes shining in the moonlight, it wasn’t until you felt a palm slide up your side. Following the natural contours of your body, the warmth emanating from it lulling you to sleep once again. A dip in the mattress, the springs creaking under the weight. 
> 
> Hot breath fanned over your neck, soft lips pressing onto the back of your ear. A deep hum filling your senses, you sighed. Cuddling back into the figure, wanting to get closer to the warm entity. A low chuckle sounded behind you, and then…
> 
> Nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW/CW: This is dark shit, like explicitly horrible shit happens in this. However, I enjoy reading dark fics, and I super loved Stalker Clyde by @clumsycopy & was inspired by the oneshot EOS by @thetorturerwrites and I wanted to write something with the sameish tone for Halloween. NSFW, Violence, Murder, Non-con elements, Domestic Violence, Surgery, Explicit sex, oral sex, anal sex, sex toys, waterboarding, forced feeding, Animal abuse (just a brief mention, I do not go into any detail).
> 
> reminder, this is a dark fic. nothing about this relationship or situation is healthy and if you find yourself being manipulated by your partner or really anyone, call the domestic abuse hotline and seek out help because there are people who can help you.

Finn and Poe begged you to stay at their house. 

Giving you a warm bed, shelter, and safety, but you couldn’t risk it. If Ren was having you watched, you didn’t want them to be in danger more than they already were. Finn was your lawyer, after all, he needed to be safe to bring justice to you and the other victims. You weren’t sure what was waiting for you when you got back home, but you knew what you had to do. 

You slammed the door shut after pulling into the garage, huffing in anger as you made eye contact with his worktable in the corner. Dropping your purse to the floor as you ran to it, frantically yanking the drawers open haphazardly, all his tools were inside. Pliers, stitches, soldering tools, hammers, some of them still stained with blood. It could be yours, it could be other victims. You weren’t sure, but your eyes spotted the key box, magnetized to the back of one of the drawers. Throwing it closed you slapped the garage door button as you walked inside the house. 

The stillness inside bringing new meaning to ‘being alone’, before it felt like you truly were alone. But now it felt like there were eyes, watching you. Every corner looking darker than usual, like someone could be lurking around. The air duct openings looked suspicious, you had heard stories about people hiding cameras in them, or entire bodies. You ran into the kitchen, flipping on all the lights as you lunged for one of the carving knives. Raising it above your head as you walked back into the living room, flicking on every lamp you could see. Nothing in the room was different, eerily still in the darkness of the home. No amount of warm light could change the memories of darkness. 

You heard a creak coming from behind the basement door, head snapping towards it. No one had been down there since the police raided the home after Ren was arrested at his office in town. There was nothing down there that would make a noise… you approached the door slowly. Pulling the door open and sprinting back into the kitchen in fear, the door creaked open into the kitchen. Hitting the wall with the knob as it opened fully, the dark hallway seeping into the already darkened aura of the home. You took a deep breath, walking to the top of the concrete stairs, flicking on the light so you wouldn’t be completely alone. 

Your shoes clicked on the floor, cringing as you heard the sound. You were all too familiar with the sounds of someone tiptoeing down to the dungeon… Ren enjoyed making you sit in suspense when he visited you down here. Trembling as you awaited for his slick shoes to come into view.

Before you knew it, you were down the steps. Staring at a bare mattress on the floor, covered in a thin sheet and one dusty pillow on the top. Pushed against the cold cement walls, above it was a plank of wood. Nailed to the wall. 

Nothing was on it, he had hidden all the tools he used on it to torture you in the last year you were together. Ren used to tack your hands to the wood, letting you bleed all over yourself if he caught you clawing at the door at the top of the stairs. The deeper screws that once adorned it held your chains in place, keeping you frozen while he fucked you. The widest holes were for the spreader bar he had hooked to it one time, just so he could see how far he could push your legs until they popped out of their sockets. 

Your fingers traced over the dents and scrapes on the wood, breath hitching when you felt everything flooding back to you. A stray tear fell down your cheek, you half expected Ren to be there to wipe it away with his thumb. He loved to taste your tears, they were perfectly salty… just what he needed to enjoy his punishments all the more. 

_KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK_

“Fuck,” you jumped at the banging, you recognized the sound. It was the front door, the same noise happened when the police came into your, his, home. You quickly spun away from the wall, bounding up the stairs two at a time to see what the commotion was for. As you approached the front door you flicked on any light you could find, trying to get rid of the darkness creeping in. You peeked through the peephole, brow furrowing when you didn’t recognize the person on the other side. You thought about leaving it alone but the person spoke through the door. 

“I know someone is here! The lights just went on!” 

You chewed your cheek, there was no way to deny that… you gripped the knob, sliding the key to Ren’s office into your pocket before you cracked the door open. “What do you want,” you choked out. 

It was a woman, she was dressed haphazardly. Her hands twitching in front of her as she stared at you with her deep brown eyes. Her hair was deep gray, pulled back into a bun atop her head. She had a warm face, but she looked upset, disturbed even. 

“Are you?” she sputtered, “Is this,” she took a deep breath, “Do you live here?” 

You gave a small nod, unable to speak as you waited for her to get on with her subject. 

She bit her lips before she continued, “You’re his wife, aren’t you? Ben’s wife?” 

“I don’t,” you stuttered, instantly regretting answering the door for this person. They had probably seen you on the news and now they were stalking you, or worse they were here to tell you what a horrible person you were for dragging your marriage into a courtroom. 

“Please,” she gave you her kind eyes again, “I’m not here to do anything. I know you’ve been through enough. I just… may I come inside?” 

“Um…” 

She gave you a soft smile, wiping her eyes before her tears began to run. 

“He, that man. He’s my son.” 

Silence. 

“I just need to know what he’s become.” 

\-----

You led the woman inside the home, watching her linger in the entryway. She took off her coat, revealing a smart-looking dark blue outfit, she looked powerful. Strong, almost like she was in the military… she reminded you of an old general from those old war movies Ren watched. She ran her fingers across the couch, becoming increasingly distressed as she moved forward. You could tell she knew, she already knew the horrors that had happened in the home. She looked like she could see it, maybe she had. If he was her son, you couldn’t imagine him being a good child. 

“Shall we sit in the kitchen?” 

You nodded, motioning her towards the back of the house. She eyed the basement door, you had left it ajar in your haste. You quickly shut it, locking it before you turned back around to her and gave a soft smile. “Sorry, I heard a noise down there.” 

“It’s understandable to be jittery, after everything my dear.” 

“So,” you sat down, folding your arms in your lap. She mirrored your actions, seating gracefully across from you before she spoke. 

“I apologize for the intrusion, I never meant to scare you. I just had to come, you see it’s been about 15 years since I’ve seen him.” She gave a heavy sigh, before she glanced around the barren room, “And then to see him, on TV. On trial? I couldn’t believe it…” 

“I’m so sorry.” 

She held up her palm, “There is no need for you to apologize to me, I am the one who should apologize to you. I shouldn’t have let him go, let him be free when I knew what a monster he would become.” 

A sigh. 

“He wasn’t always like that, he was a happy little boy. A happy baby too, he was absolutely perfect when he was born. His father and I were so grateful to have him,” she shifted, “But after his father died, he changed.” 

“Oh,” you whispered, unsure of how you were supposed to respond. You weren’t sure what she was doing, was she trying to guilt you into forgiving him? Or attempt to explain his behavior? There was no way this small woman could vouch for him, you had watched him beat and abuse yourself and countless others just because he wanted to see blood. 

She looked back at you, “I believe you, you know. Everything he’s accused of, I know he’s done it.” She sighed, “I’ve seen it in him, as a boy. The darkness inside him, he came by it honestly. The ugliness that ate him away and I ignored it. Thought that I could just send him away for stricter training and prayed that the military schools could beat it out of him. But he just got worse, and after the fire at the 3rd school... he was a lost cause.” 

You took a deep breath, “He told me he hated you. That you would try to coddle him, even braid his hair when he was younger. Which is why he never let me braid mine…” 

“Hm,” she looked away from you, “He knew how to be cruel about anything beautiful in this world, even his own mother.” 

“Why are you here?” 

“I just needed to see if you were real, that a child was taken by him and forced into all this. I didn’t want to believe it, but here you are, barely a woman. Shackled to that… thing.” 

You shook your head, “But that doesn’t explain why you’re here. Why did you need to see me, is it closure that you’re looking for? Because I can’t give you that,” you began to take sharp breaths, feeling your chest tighten with anxiety, “I have no closure, nothing! He took everything from me, and now you're here trying to do what! Explain his villain origin story?” 

She watched you breathe through your panic attack, not moving an inch to help or even calm you. At least her son, her little monster, would cradle you when he felt you hyperventilating. Even though he only did it so he wouldn’t have to deal with you uncontrollably crying and screaming, if he wasn’t in the mood for it he would put an end to the anxiety the moment he saw it. 

“I think you should leave,” you got up from the table, gesturing towards the front door so she would get the hint. “Whatever you’re here for, you aren’t getting it from me. I would tell you to go visit him but if you really are who you say you are… then the chains he’s in won’t protect you for what he would do to you.” 

\----- 

You barely slept, tossing and turning like the night before the trial started. You couldn’t stop thinking about the woman, Leia was her name. She had told you it as she left, giving you her phone number in case you wanted to reach her. You swiftly ripped it up and threw it in the firepit in the backyard, wanting to rinse your hands of whatever evil she was here for. 

You dressed quickly, wrapping yourself in a warm winter dress. A long-sleeve turtleneck, deep emerald green in color, complete with a pair of knee-high snakeskin leather boots. A gift he had given you one Christmas, he liked it when you wore them with nothing else. Having you strut up and down the halls in them while he stroked his cock from a chair he had brought from the kitchen. 

Just as you were getting ready to leave you felt something in your pocket, fishing out the small item. You gasped when you saw it, the key. The very key to his office… 

You walked inside the room slowly, aware of the darkness that's inside. He had made it very clear you weren’t allowed in here, not even the police had been in the office. It was always bolted shut and even in handcuffs, Ren refused to let them in. The walls were lined with bookshelves, a few diplomas, and some picture frames. You paid them no mind, you had three things to look for and they were supposed to be ‘obvious’ that he would want them in prison. 

On the back wall was a set of floor to ceiling windows, illuminating the rich maroon leather chair pushed into his mahogany desk. Atop it sat a laptop, and a desktop, along with several pieces of paper. Some of the envelopes were bills, letters from campaign donors, and a few were scrawled in his sideways handwriting. 

One in particular shocked you. 

It was made out to your parents. 

Complete with their address, and the return label had the name Benjamin Solo on it. 

You couldn’t help yourself, ripping it open with your teeth and perching in his chair. The leather cools on the backs of your thighs. There were multiple papers inside and a few snapshots that you didn’t bother to look at. You scanned through the letters, your hands wrinkling into the pages as you grew angrier and angrier with every line. You tore through the first two pages, eager to get to the ending to see what the point was of the letter. 

“Oh my god,” you whispered as you read the final line. Your hand coming up to your mouth to stifle your sobs. Collapsing into the chair in a small ball, shivering as each sob tore through you. Barely able to take incomplete breaths. Why would he say that to them? Why were they in communication with him? 

Why did he keep this from you? 

You ripped up the letter, wanting to purge it from the Earth. If you couldn’t see it, it didn’t exist. In your haste, you nudged the mouse to his computer, the screen illuminating. The login screen made you cry more. 

It was a picture of you. 

Dressed in your wedding dress. 

Smiling at him, an actual smile on your face. Your fingers fiddling with your wedding ring that used to adorn your left hand, your hair cascading down your shoulders. Dyed and styled in his favorite style, complimenting the face he hand molded with his fists. You were so happy, you remembered that moment it was taken. 

The two of you had gotten married at the courthouse, in another state over. He said it was the only place he could get a marriage license without a three day waiting period and he ‘didn’t want you to change your mind about marrying him’. As if you had a choice, none of it was consensual in reality. You had become so dependent on him, terrified to leave the house without him protecting you. Ren had taken so much time beating into you that no one loved you like he did, and he was there to eliminate anyone that would harm you. 

This is why the blood of his victims was on both your hands. You helped with every step, willingly or not. He had you strip their clothes, shred licenses, and credit cards. Sift through their records after he had tortured them in the very basement he tortured you in. After he was done he would come upstairs covered in their blood. Their handprints on his cheeks a sign of their struggle to stay alive, he never washed the stains off. Ren loved to see the proof of the pain he caused. 

Sometimes he would take you downstairs, to make you see the monster he took from the world for you. Pressing your hands into the puddles of blood, sealing your hands together with their spill. Ren loved to fuck with the blood, stripping you bare once you were sulled with the victims’ blood as much as he was. Debasing you on the soaked mattress where the victim took their last breath, and you let him. 

Your wedding day was different, Ren had a hotel for both of you, adjoining rooms so he couldn’t see you getting ready with the makeup team he had hired. When the picture was taken, the both of you were at the courthouse. Waiting in front of the podium before the ceremony, he was gushing over you. Trying to keep his hands off you but unable to stop himself, running his nails across your bare arms. Kissing your neck and sucking on your ear, while he whispered how beautiful you were. Ren looked beautiful too, and you had made sure to tell him. 

Ren took the picture on his phone, followed by a video of you saying his favorite phrase. 

I love you, Kylo Ren. 

You shook away the memory once the background faded. Nothing about that day should make you feel the way you did, anxious to see him again. Have him be close enough to touch, you wanted to attack him. But another part of you was screaming at you to let him go. To let Ren take you away from all this so it was the two of you alone once again. You were exhausted from taking care of yourself, Ren made it look so easy. 

You cleared your throat, moving across the table and fingering something sticking out of the computer. Your thumb and forefinger clutched it, pulling it out of the socket without a second thought. “Shit,” you whispered, bringing the tiny piece to your face. Eyes widening at the realization. 

It was a flash drive, the same flash drive that had everything on it. Every photo, every detailed note of his abuse on you. Ren had told you he kept a catalog of it all so that he wouldn’t repeat his punishments. He wanted something new and unexpected every time he had to hurt you. There would be pictures of everything, your wired jaw, the glued eyelids, your shoulder surgery, the broken knee, the time he decided you needed a breast lift. Along with detailed instructions on how to execute every single incision. 

You pocketed the drive in your bra without a second thought, Finn would need to see it. You were sure there were passcodes on it, but you had broken into people’s bank accounts with ease. The drive would be a piece of cake, a sure-fire way to win the trial. You lifted out of the chair, determined to make it to your lawyer’s house as soon as possible, but on the way around you knocked your knee on a drawer. 

Pulling it open on accident, letting you peek inside. You gasped when you saw the contents, immediately recognizing the items Ren wanted. Without looking back you snatched them out and ran from the office, locking the door on the way out. Stuffing everything into your purse as you went into the garage. 

Glancing at the clock you saw the time, 11:45 AM. You had 15 minutes to get to the prison, there was no time to reach Finn’s to drop off the flash drive before going to see Ren. At this rate, you were already going to be 3 minutes late. 

\-----

The guards let you in without a second blink, showing your ID before the security screening. One of the men gave you a soft smile, nodding his head at you to walk through without any check. He must’ve recognized you from the TV, maybe he felt bad for you. After checking in with the second set of guards you were led down a long hallway. The walls a sterile white, the air reeking of bleach. Exposed pipes were running along the ceiling, the rush of water ringing in the small space. 

“You have an hour, the prisoner is cuffed to the table but it will be a face to face meeting at the Defenses request.” 

You gave the guard a tight-lipped smile, “Thank you.” 

He nodded at you, chewing his lip, “Ma’am, if you feel unsafe at any moment, myself and Ushar will be on the other side of the door. There aren’t cameras inside the rooms for security reasons but there are one-way mirrors inside.” 

“Thank you, I’ll be sure to get you the moment I feel uncomfortable.” 

With another stiff nod, he stepped away from you allowing the door to open on its own. Behind it revealing your monster, dressed in white and black stripes. His bruised wrists were folded atop the table, Ren said nothing. Only blown smoke through his nostrils, a single cigarette between his pink lips. The door side shut behind you, causing you to yelp and jump forward. A deep chuckle came from the table, “You’re jumpy my love, are you stressed about something?” 

“Just the door,” you gulped, moving to the table. Ren kicked the chair across from him out for you, which you begrudgingly sat in, plopping your purse down next to you. “I’m completely calm.” 

“Hm,” he chuckled again, “You look like it.” 

Ren took the cigarette from his mouth, ashing it in a small tray that sat on the barren table. His shackles clinking as he moved, Ren took a deep breath as he surveyed you. Deep eyes swirling with mixed emotions; amusement, anger, lust, and whatever emotion means love to him. You folded your arms across your chest, unintentionally pressing your breast out more than needed. Rens’ eyes flitted between the exposed flesh and your face, licking his lips from the discomfort rolling off of you, “You’re late you know.” 

You chewed the inside of your cheek, avoiding his gaze while you slumped into the seat. You opened your mouth to respond but he cut you off again. 

“Stop slouching, God,” he sneered, “Did you forget everything I’ve taught you? Your manners leave your little brain the moment I’m gone.” Ren took another drag of his cigarette, “Fix your posture before I do it for you.” 

“You can’t touch me,” you said smugly back to him. “The guards are watching your every move, and your hands are bound. So whose the stupid one now?” 

He let out a laugh, a full-bellied laugh, “I’m sure they are Love, but they won’t do anything for you.” Ren smiled at you after blowing a cloud directly into your face, causing you to cough from the smoke, “This flimsy table between us will do nothing to protect you, no matter how much you try to convince yourself it will.” 

“Did you just call me here to threaten me, Ren?” 

“Not exactly,” he glanced over at the left wall where the mirror was. You swore you could see him wink at it, but it was too quick for you to recognize it. “I presume you brought me my things, you wouldn’t want to disappoint me any further, would you?” 

You said nothing, looking down to your lap at your trembling hands. You heard shifting from the opposite side, it sounded like he was leaning on the table. “ _Love_ ,” he whispered, “Did you bring me what I asked for?” 

“Mm,” you whined, the words dying in your throat as you tried to speak to him. You heard his foot slide across the floor, nudging your purse so it would fall over. The contents spilling out and rolling around. “What do you have?” 

You reached down and shoved it back inside, placing it on your lap protectively. Flashing your eyes back up to him in fear, “Just my things, Kylo.” 

“Nothing for me?” he cocked a brow, his mouth pulled into a deep smirk. Your throat was dry, regretting even coming here to see him. You swiftly stood from the table, “I’m leaving, I’m sorry.” 

You walked to the door and rapped against the metal, awaiting the guards to slide the doors open. Ren stayed seated, taking in deep breaths as he watched you, you could feel his eyes on the back of your skull. You tried again, bracing both palms against the door and attempting to slide it open yourself. 

“It’s bolted shut,” Ren called out, “So I suggest you come over here and give me what I want.” 

You silently spun around, listening to your heels click against the cold tile floor. Ren beckoned you over to his left, fingers curling in the air for your compliance. His hand wrapped around your waist as you drew closer, enough to feel the smoke exhaling from his nostrils. He skated his palm along the fabric of your dress, eyes devouring the lines. Your curves were on full display, a map he could caress with each digit. Ren hummed into you, leaning his head against your stomach. His long hair brushing against the underside of your breasts, it was greasier than you had ever seen it. Ren wasn’t one to let his appearance falter, he was obsessed with both of your images, vanity being his strong suit. But he looked terrible, up close you could see the darkened bags under his eyes. With the slick grease along his hair and skin, you weren’t sure when he was last allowed to shower in the facility. His jaw and chin were peppered with black stubble, threatening to paint his face with a beard. Something he wouldn’t allow on the outside, he hated the way he looked with it. Your stupid, broken heart ached for him, wanting so badly to yell at the guards to allow him to shower and shave. He must’ve been miserable. 

Ren rubbed his cheek into your dress, humming when the soft fabric caressed his skin. His shackled hands gathered under his chin so he could lean into you more. 

Ren mumbled into you, “I missed you, (Y/N). It’s so hard to sleep without you.” You let out a heavy sigh, hovering your palm above his head as you debated on coddling him. Trembling as you considered the pros and cons of the action, yes he was a monster. Who had done unspeakable things to you for the entirety of your adult life… but he cared for you. Sought comfort in your presence, as you did with him in the end. You brought your left hand down on his hair, silently gagging when you felt the slick locks. He smirked into your belly, “I know it’s gross.” 

You ignored the comment, running your fingers through them as best you could. Occasionally coming up on a knot, detangling it as gently as you could while he purred into you. You felt his hands stretch out across your abdomen, unable to lay flush because of the shackles. “You know,” you whispered, “If you didn’t smoke, your skin wouldn’t be so bad.” 

“Hm,” he purred into you again, “It’s not my fault I have no stress relief in here, it’s all I can do to pass the time before I see you again.” 

“ _Kylo_.” 

“What?” 

He pressed his chin into your stomach, looking straight up at you. Your hands now cradling his head in both palms as you stared down at him, he looked so broken. You hated it, hated that you hated seeing it, you shouldn’t care. But fuck, those big brown eyes did everything for you. 

“Did you miss me?” 

You swallowed back the lump in your throat, your fingers stilling in his hair. Your words had to be chosen very carefully. You could feel what he was doing, baiting you into some sort of trap. But you were already knee-deep in the black tar he was pulling you into, so you followed what your heart was screaming at you. 

“I missed you,” you barely whispered. You weren’t sure Ren had even heard it, the only thing giving it away was his brow slightly lifting. His tongue darted out to lips his lips as his eyes fell on yours. You felt his hands shift under his chin, the shackles digging through the fabric. “Can I kiss you, my love?” 

Without a second thought, you crashed your lips into his, moaning immediately at the taste of him. Enveloping your mouth with his strong musk, the tobacco from his cigarette mixing in with his tongue as it slid inside your mouth. Both your hands went from the back of his head to his cheeks, cupping them like he was a piece of glass. His breath hitched as you held him, fingers curling into your dress and lightly tugging you closer to his body. 

You followed him, not able to break your kiss in the process. He mumbled against you, “Sit on me, baby,” Ren’s lips traveled down your jaw, “Need to feel you.” 

“Ah,” you gasped as his teeth grazed over your pulse point, falling into his lap. You braced yourself on his shoulders, swinging your right leg over his lap so you could be perched across him. Ren moaned against you, his hands roaming from your belly towards your breasts. Cupping them simultaneously while you ground into him, his thumbs grazing over your nipples. Your breath hitched as he ran small circles around them, “Kylo, what if they see us?” 

“There aren’t any cameras Love,” he mumbled into your neck, “It’s just you and me.” 

“But.” 

“Just trust me, it’s going to be alright,” he snapped at you, irritated at your stalling. “Get this off.” 

You nodded softly, leaning your chest into his so you could hike the hem of your dress over the swell of your ass. Sighing when you felt the harsh fabric of his pants rub against your bare skin, Ren groaned as your skin became exposed. Pulling his hands back into his chest so you could cross your arms. Yanking the dress over your head and throwing it to the ground, learning it skid into the far corner. Ren’s lips attached to your collarbone, sucking fast and hard to the skin. Pulling a deep moan from your chest, clamping down on his lap as you rocked into him. He sucked a line of bruises across your chest, moving between your breasts to bite at your bra. Pulling it from your body and growling at the fabric, he mumbled through his teeth, “I can’t take this off with my hands like this.” 

“I can do it,” you moaned, absentmindedly unclipping your bra and slipping the straps off. Ren’s mouth popped open at the sight of your bare breasts, softly bouncing while you ground into him. You were panting, waiting for his hands to caress one of them, your eyes squeezed shut with anticipation. 

You weren’t expecting the harsh smack across your face. Followed by a death grip around your throat, bending you back into the cold table. “Ky! What-,” 

“What’s this?” he spat at you, standing over your bent form. Spit flying from his mouth as he snarled into you, pure fear coursing through your veins as he held you at his mercy. “Wh-what are you talking-ing about?” 

Ren scoffed, the sound of metal clicking filled the room. His left hand stayed wrapped around your throat, nails digging into your flesh. While his right hand, separated from the chains, lifted a small black square to your face. 

You squinted at it, confused about where it came from. You opened your mouth to speak but Ren spat on your face. Covering it with his spit before he dragged his pinkie and ring finger through the spittle, smearing your makeup before shoving the length into your mouth. 

“Why was my flash drive in your bra?” 

You squeaked against the pressure, feeling your vision tunneling as his grip grew worse. 

“You were stealing, my personal property. What were you going to do little girl? Bring it to your bumbling lawyer? Use it as evidence against me?” 

You violently shook your head, taking in sharp breaths when he let the pressure off slightly. “No no, I wasn’t!” 

“You think I’m so stupid,” Ren growled, “I asked you to do a simple task. Bring me three items from my office, and instead of listening to your husband you steal from me!” 

“I-please Kylo,” you choked again, “You’re hurting me.” 

He exhaled hotly on your face, eyes darting across your pained expression. Ren lifted you from the table by the neck, snarling in your face, “Where are the items I asked for (Y/N).” 

You couldn’t answer, instead using the last threads of your consciousness to claw at his hand. Digging your nails across his muscled forearm, trying to hook your fingers underneath his grip so you could pry him off. 

Ren didn’t accept that as an answer, slamming you down into the table. Crushing it into the floor below with your bareback. You let out a pained scream, reverberating along the metal walls of the room. The cage, you were trapped in with a predator, who had lured you into a sense of safety. You wailed in pain as he let go of you, pressing his feet against the side of your cheek. Keeping you pinned to the floor as you screamed, you tried to watch him in your peripheral vision. 

He bent over the discarded remains of the table, arm snatching your purse from the floor and emptying it over your naked form. You sobbed when the items fell out, chest compression from your lack of oxygen. His foot came off of you as he crouched on the floor, shooting you a glare, Daring you to try and move from your spot on the floor, “You better hope you brought me what I wanted, or else you won’t walk out of those doors alive.” 

Ren sifted through the remnants on your skin, your breath hitching each time his fingers grazed your skin. Even in your weakened state, your body was buzzing in need for him. Making you squirm underneath him, your eyes darting between his legs to see if he was aroused. It’s all you wanted, you wanted to be good for him, you had brought the items. You had coddled him, told him you missed him, you deserved praise instead of punishment. 

“Good girl,” he patted your left breast, in his opposite fist were the three things. A pair of bobby pins, a battery with two wires attached to the top, and a small vile. You knew why he wanted them all, and you hated yourself for being compliant in bringing them all. You waited on bated breath for him to move, to do anything. 

Ren pocketed the items, looking down at you with shame coloring his brow. “I’m sorry love, you knew it was wrong to take that. But you did it anyway.” 

“I have to remind you who’s in charge, it’s not you just because I’m not home.” 

He nudged you with his foot, waiting for you to respond to him. You groaned as you rolled to your side, facing his legs with your body. More tears spilled over your cheeks as your hands weakly gripped the black and white fabric. Small spots of blood staining it, “I’m s-s-sorry Kylo. I didn’t mean to.” 

“I know you didn’t,” He bent over and scooped you into his arms. Running his fingers up and down your spine, hearing you wince as he grazed small cuts from the table. “That still doesn’t mean you won’t be punished.” 

Ren dropped you to the floor, flush between his chest and the wall. You stared blankly at him, unable to speak in fear of his punishment not being over. He sighed above you, “What do we say when Daddy teaches us a lesson?” 

“Thank you,” you meekly whispered. 

“Mm,” Ren’s fingers dug into your hips, spinning you around. Slamming your cheek into the painted brick wall, his fingers ripping your panties down your legs. Pooling at your feet before him, “I’m glad you remember _some_ of our rules.” He grunted behind you, bringing a palm to your left cheek and prying it open. His right hand smacked at your back, pushing you into arching out for him so he could see your folds. Ren hummed as you obeyed, bringing two fingers to your lips. 

“Suck.” 

You cried as your mouth popped open, letting him fuck his fingers down your throat. Gagging around their thickness, your saliva pooling embarrassingly quick from his abuse. Ren hummed happily, ripping them from you before he brought them down to your entrance. He didn’t bother giving warning, plunging their length into your pussy. Both of you groaning at the intrusion, Ren waited for a few seconds before he started scissoring you apart for him. You winced at the stretch, he was being rougher than usual, but you could feel the anger radiating off of him from your betrayal. So, you took in sharp breaths to accommodate the pain until it morphed into pleasure. 

After a few more pumps he pulled out of you, earning a whine from your sore throat. You heard the tugging of his pants falling around his knees, the slick sound of him fisting his cock with his wet fingers. With so much as a grunt, Ren drove his cock inside you, not allowing you to adjust. Fucking his hips into you roughly, you hiccuped at the pace he set. Sobs and wails bubbling in your throat at each thrust. You could barely hear him grunting behind you, groaning at the slick sound of your heat engulfing him each time. 

“Kylo, please slow down!” 

He laughed behind you, “Can’t do that, you wasted too much time crying on the floor. Soon those guards are going to burst in and take you from me, take your sweet pussy away from me again.” 

You moaned, backing your hips against him. You didn’t want that, you would give anything to keep him here, keep his cock buried inside you. Ren’s cock was tearing you apart, his head skating across your front wall at each thrust. Causing you to clench and cream all over him, wailing as he picked up the pace. You felt his head fall to your left shoulder, “I love you so much (Y/N), you can’t leave me here.” 

You sobbed, pressing your hands into the wall in an attempt to push him off of you. His hands dug into your flesh harder, his right hand moving towards your mound. Middle and ring finger rubbing tight circles around your clit. 

“I’m going to get out of here,” he rasped in your hair, “You know that they can’t keep me here. Away from you, I’ll always be there to find you.” 

A beat. 

_“No matter how far you run, I’ll fucking find you.”_

You cried out, his fingers pinching at your clit as he grazed your sponge over and over. One of your hands snaked back into his hair, “Fuck Kylo! I’m gonna cum, please!” 

“Tell me,” he whispered, licking the shell of your ear, “Tell me you’ll help me. You can’t leave me here to rot, you wouldn’t do that to me.” 

“I-,” you choked, “I-fuck-I can’t Kylo.” 

He groaned into you, stilling himself inside you. Grinding his hips into your ass, rocking his cock in small sideways circles inside you as he fought his orgasm. Ren flicked your clit a few times, both of you seething from pleasure. 

“Say it. You already brought me what I needed, you want me. You need me, I know you can’t survive without me Love.” 

He panted in your ear, “You’re so lonely. So lost, you need me.” 

“I need you,” you nodded into him. A strangled moan erupting from your throat, “I need you, I need you, Kylo!” 

“Yessss,” he hissed, picking up the pace again. Bringing you to the cliff of your orgasm, shoving you off with him. Your lips tangled with one another as you plunged into the warm waves of bliss. Ren had you both pressed against the brick wall, panting into you. He slid out of you, spinning you so he could hold you flush with his body. Sloppy kisses were shared back and forth, accompanied by whispers of devotion to one another. 

You don’t remember leaving the room after you tugged your clothes back on and lipped Ren’s cuffs back on. He had followed you to the door, watching you with sad eyes as you greeted the guard. Ren had pulled you into a tender kiss, you momentarily rubbed his cheek as your tongues danced again. Your foreheads resting on one another’s as you whispered goodbye. 

\-----

Finn met you at the courthouse again, he was nervous. Fidgeting with his sleeves as you walked up to him. Still in the same outfit you visited the prison, you had fixed your hair and makeup in the car before coming inside. You were jittery about seeing him again, you hadn’t told him you went to Ren’s meeting. Brushing off the invitation to him and Poe the evening before as a ploy to get you in a room together. Which was true, completely a ploy for Ren to convince you to do his dirty work. 

“Fuck,” Finn sighed, “I didn’t think you were coming! I sent Poe to the house to find you, but you weren’t there.” 

“Sorry, I was just driving around,” you smiled, “Was nervous about being here today.” 

“Are you ready? The defense is doing their questioning today with you on stand,” Finn rubbed the back of his neck. His nervous energy was getting on your nerves, and it was sending you spiraling into a pit of doubt. 

“Totally fine,” you choked out. 

Everyone filed into the courtroom, Ren and his lawyer coming after you. He looked cleaned up, his hair had its natural shine and waves to it, and his face was freshly shaved. It struck you as odd when he didn’t make eye contact with you. Glazing over when he looked remotely in your direction, it was infuriating. Making you mad and depressed, he had told you he loved you and cared about you earlier… 

“I guess that was a lie,” you whispered to yourself. 

“What was that (Y/N)?” Finn pipped up next to you, looking at you with soft eyes. You shook your head, “Nothing, just talking to myself.” 

The judge announced the case once again, explaining to the jury what was happening today and the subsequent days until the final statements in 4 days. You fidgeted in your seat, feeling sweat pool at the nape of your neck from the anxiety of what was to come. 

“Mrs. Ren,” Judge Riley called out, “Could you please take the stand?” 

“Yes,” you squeaked out, you smoothed out your dress as you stood. The sound of your heels filled the courtroom, the bailiff meeting you at the stand. You swore in once again, ready to get this over with. From the seat, you could see everyone. The audience was filled with familiar and unfamiliar faces, your parents boring into your soul. Ironically sitting on Ren’s side, you wrinkled your nose at them. Remembering the letter you found, you would be sure to bring it up with Ren if the opportunity came up. 

Ren’s lawyer stood, his fiery red hair almost blinding under the courtroom lights. He cleared his throat before approaching you, “Mrs. Ren, as you know I am Hux. The defense lawyer.” 

“Yes sir,” you spoke into the mic, leaning slightly into your chair as you watched him like a hawk. 

“Is that the name you go by Mrs. Ren?” 

You cocked a brow, “Excuse me?” 

“Do you feel comfortable using your marital name? Or is there another nomenclature you’re more familiar with.” 

You squinted at him, your gaze briefly falling to Ren. You were startled to see him making eye contact, unblinking as he licked his lips at your surprised expression. “Um, I’m not sure what you’re asking for Hux. That is my marital name, whether I wanted it or not.” 

“Interesting,” Hux paced in front of you, “It surprises me that you allow people to refer to you this way since you have expressed such hatred towards your husband. It was shocking to see you never registered for a name change, or even a divorce before the time of this trial.”

“I didn’t want to postpone this trial, there is more than my life on the line here Mr. Hux.” 

“I see,” he turned to the jury. “Ladies and gentleman, I apologize for the confusing questions. As you much know, I am quite puzzled by this. As you are, something doesn’t add up. For a woman who, categorically, has slandered her husband up and down, to not file for divorce. It’s perplexing, it really makes you think.” 

The judge banged his gavel, startling you and the rest of the courtroom, “Mr. Hux, this time is for questioning the prosecution. Not for your inner monologuing.” 

“I apologize, your honor,” Hux nodded his head, “I shall move on.” 

He turned to you, “Mrs. Ren, where were you today at noon?” 

Your mouth snapped shut, Finn’s head shot at you quicker than you could blink. You caught a smile falling on Hux’s lips, “Were you at home? Or at a friend’s house?” 

“I was home.” 

“That’s very interesting.” 

He walked back to his bench, grabbing a large binder and flipping through countless pages before he looked back at you. “Your honor, I’d like to present our first piece of evidence against the charges upon my client.” 

The judge nodded, “Proceed.” 

“Here in my hands is the guest sign-in for Rebellion Federal Prison, inside is a record of every single person who has visited the establishment. The same establishment my client, Mr. Ren, has been housed.” 

Hux set the book on the jury’s bench, moving his finger to the highlighted name on the bottom, “As you can see at noon today, there was a check-in from a (Y/N) Ren. So do tell me, where were you today at noon, because it seems like you have your locations confused with the truth.” 

“Objection,” Finn stood from the bench, “Leading the witness, he’s baiting her into an answer he wants your honor.” 

“Overruled, Mr. Hux continue.” 

“Why were you at Rebellion Federal Prison today?” 

You swallowed a lump in your throat, leaning into the mic, “I was there visiting someone.” 

“Someone?” 

“Yes.” 

“Do you care to tell us who?” 

You stayed silent, looking down at your hands in your lap. Tugging on the hem of your dress between your fingers. Hux sighed before you, his boots spinning on the floor as he moved back to the bench. You heard movement, the sound of a projector lowering on the opposite end of the room. Right in front of the jury and audience, you felt your heart drop into your stomach. 

“It seems like Mrs. Ren was visiting a close friend,” Hux clicked a remote, your figure coming onto the screen. Showing you walking into the prison and greeting the guards. The next slide shows you passing through security. “She was escorted to an interrogation room, which is very uncommon for visits.” With another click, you winced at the next image. It was from the inside of the room, showing you sitting directly in front of Ren. 

The picture was grainy, but the image didn’t line. The date and time on the bottom right-hand corner. It was you willingly sitting with your abuser, “Yes, I was visiting someone. I don’t see how that’s relevant Mr. Hux.” 

“Oh, you don’t?” Hux smirked at you, clicking to the next image which made you audibly gasp. It was a still of you standing next to Ren, your hands in his hair. “So who are you with here? It looks like they are more than a friend, perhaps a lover?” 

“That’s my husband, Kylo Ren,” you mumbled into the mic. Unable to look up from the stand, you could feel the disappointment from Finn. Along with the cocky smiles of both Ren and Hux. 

“So you were visiting your husband, who has been accused of beating, raping, and maiming you for the past five years of your courtship.” Hux waltzed over to the jury bench, leaning on it with his right arm, you heard another click, “Why would you visit him if he’s done these things to you?”

“He called me, and asked me to come visit him yesterday morning.” 

A hum. 

“That’s the truth, you can check my phone records and see, and my lawyer was there for the call.” 

Hux chuckled, “Sweetie, there is no doubt that you were in communication with your husband, but what is unclear is the nature of your relationship with a man you’ve blatantly called a monster in this very courtroom.” 

“Were you forced to visit him?” 

You swallowed harshly, “No.” 

“You went there willingly?” 

“Yes.” 

“Why?” 

You went silent. 

Hux chucked his tongue, clicking the button once again. The next image pulling a gasp from the jury, it was you and Ren. From another angle, you were straddled on his lap with your mouths connected in heated passion. Thankfully it was a still of you clothed. 

“What was the purpose of the visit, Mrs. Ren?” 

“We talked,” you spat back, your tone clipped.

“Hm,” Hux pondered your response, “From this image, it doesn’t seem like there was any discussion from either party, so I’ll ask you again. What was the purpose of the visit?” 

Silence again. 

“Mr. Ren,” Hux spun towards his client, “Do you know the purpose of your wife’s visit to the prison?” 

“We were having a visit that most couples partake in while in prison.” 

“And what is the name for those visits?” 

Ren smiled at you, giving you a quick wink before he spoke, “Conjugal, your honor.” 

“That was not what the visit was for,” you spat, “I was there because Ren asked me to.” 

“So you deny that this was a carnal visit between two consenting partners?” 

You shot daggers at Hux, “Yes, we didn’t partake in anything sexual aside from a heated kiss.” 

As the words left your tongue you heard Hux press another button. The courtroom silent as a video appeared on the screen, the quality clearer than the other images. It was Ren fucking you against the wall, complete with your begging. Exclaiming how you needed him, more than anything in the world. It was almost like the two of you had mics on, there was no explanation for the footage. Every thrust, moan, and gush between the two of you played out on the screen in the courtroom. 

Hux paused the video, turning to you and then the jury. 

“So, Mrs. Ren.” 

A beat. 

“Tell us again what you were doing at the prison today?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *insert gif of Remy the rat throwing up*


	6. The Third Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A cool breeze nipped at your exposed legs, causing goosebumps to erupt over your skin. You were curled into your comforter, comfy and safe, your cheek pressed against your pillow. Lips pursed and a small amount of drool seeping into the fabric. A creak came from the corner of your room, slightly rousing you from your slumber. You glanced around, your drooping eyelids barely taking in the scene. In your sleep riddled state, you didn't see him, his large figure stalking towards you. The whites of his eyes shining in the moonlight, it wasn't until you felt a palm slide up your side. Following the natural contours of your body, the warmth emanating from it lulling you to sleep once again. A dip in the mattress, the springs creaking under the weight. 
> 
> Hot breath fanned over your neck, soft lips pressing onto the back of your ear. A deep hum filling your senses, you sighed. Cuddling back into the figure, wanting to get closer to the warm entity. A low chuckle sounded behind you, and then... 
> 
> Nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please mind the tags, i’m not fucking around with them. Here is the link to my Masterlist and Window Panes Masterlist. 
> 
> TW/CW: This is dark shit, like explicitly horrible shit happens in this. However, I enjoy reading dark fics, and I super loved Stalker Clyde by @clumsycopy & was inspired by the oneshot EOS by @thetorturerwrites and I wanted to write something with the sameish tone for Halloween. NSFW, Violence, Murder, Non-con elements, Domestic Violence, Surgery, Explicit sex, oral sex, anal sex, sex toys, waterboarding, forced feeding, Animal abuse (just a brief mention, I do not go into any detail).

You were curled in bed, the sheets tucked around your form. Sighing softly into the pillows that cradled your head. Your body seeking out warmth in your slumber, softly reaching behind your shoulder to tangle in the dark mess of hair behind you. Earning a satisfied hum, followed by a nuzzle into your back. Rens hot breath fanned across your ear in his slumber, you loved when he was like this. Letting you cling to him for protection, safety, he was your rock. And he loved it, loved you wanting him, it made him feel better. 

Like you trusted him, that he would take care of you no matter what happened. 

A few hours later you stirred awake, groaning as you stretched your arms above your head and rolled your wrists. Joints cracking into the early morning air, you smacked your lips. Lazily looking to your left, over your shoulder was Ren. His eyes shut, mouth popped out allowing his snores to fill the room. He always said he didn’t snore, but he did, to the point where he could shatter glass with the noise. In the beginning of you sharing a bed, he was so tense in his sleep that he cracked a tooth from grinding. Now, you forced him to wear a guard at night, even though he took it out the moment you fell asleep. 

The little bastard, you shook your head. Placing a soft kiss on his forehead after swiping his hair from his face. You slid out of bed, wrapping your robe and cinching your waist. Softly shutting the door behind you, before padding towards the kitchen. 

It was Sunday, your lazy day. Ren and you had a ritual on these days, to talk about the week ahead, and bask in each other’s bodies. You reveled in the calm nature of these days, there was no fear. No darkness, no fighting or shouting, it was the only day you knew you were safe from his abuse. You leaned on the countertop, chewing on an apple as you brewed Ren’s coffee. Maybe the two of you could go for a walk today, the flowers were blooming finally after the long winter. You had been cooped up all season and were itching to go outside the gates. The backyard wasn’t enough, maybe he would let you start a garden. 

Ren was wary of your attitude change, ever since David died in his hands. You had become more compliant than ever, and he didn’t trust it. He kept leaving you opportunities to slip up, leaving the garage open for you. Keys sitting on counters, leaving out knives that you could slit his throat with. But you didn’t, you knew it was a trap. You knew when it was safe, and it was safe for you to stay where you were. He hadn’t hurt you in a while, just sharp words of anger was the most of his wrath. 

You snapped out of your thoughts to the sound of footsteps coming down the stairs. Ren’s bare feet coming into view at the bottom, he was wearing some old sleep pants and no shirt. He gave you a sleepy smile, scratching the blossom of red on his chest while he yawned. “Hello, love.” 

“Morning,” you whispered back, padding over to where he was seated. A cup in hand, black coffee. He hummed when you placed it in front of him, standing with a straight back and hands clasped together while you stood next to him. Ren took a slow sip, a soft moan falling from his throat as he took in the flavor. You smiled to yourself, happy that you made Ren happy, if you kept this up maybe he would listen to your request. 

In the few years you’ve been here you’ve learned not to request things. Ren gets irritated when he hears you begging outside the bedroom, it was unladylike and makes you seem like bitch in heat. The few times you have asked for things, he let you tread the line carefully, letting you go outside with him. But, keeping you on a tight leash, and if you strayed… there was hell to pay. 

Everything was a lesson. 

And the lesson was _‘Don’t cross Kylo’._

“Lovely,” Ren cleared his throat, setting down the newspaper you had gathered from the front step. He outstretched his left leg, patting lightly on his strong thigh for you to perch upon, you did so enthusiastically. Careful not to wrap your arms around him in joy, his affection right now was guarded and there was no reason to celebrate just yet. Ren’s heavy paw latched to your waist, fingering the silk tie that kept your dignity intact. “What is it you want to do today? Hm?” 

You took a deep breath, being sure to puff your chest out enough for him to catch a glimpse of the valley between your breasts. “I would like to go to town, and,” you cleared your throat again. He already looked irritated, opening his mouth to respond, “And, maybe get some supplies for gardening. I don’t know much about it. But, I’d like to learn.” 

Ren cocked a brow, taking a slow drink of his coffee before he addressed you, “Oh? My little girl wants to learn? Are you not feeling stimulated here?” 

“No-no,” you shook your head profusely, “I was just asking because I like spending time outside and with the weather getting better…” 

“I understand.” 

You fidgetted on his thigh, feeling the muscle flex underneath your weight. His eyes glanced to the left of your neck, studying your healing skin. The deep scars from his makeshift jaw surgery were finally fading, enough for him to rationalize taking you to see a cosmetic surgeon to have them lightened even more. You were grateful, but you also knew he was going to make other things happen while you were there. He had been pointing out various imperfections on your body recently, like how your waist didn’t have the same slope on both sides. Or how your breasts aren’t as perky as he would like them to be, your arms were lacking definition in them. It was terrifying listening to him list the issues he found, writing them in a notebook probably for him to research procedures he could inflict on you at a later date. 

Ren moved you off of him, “Let us get dressed then.” 

Both of you dressed casually, Ren had on black jeans a gray hoodie. Complete with a green overcoat that you had ordered him online, the one time you were allowed with ‘free’ internet. You know he monitored you on the tablet, he acted surprised anyway when he opened the birthday present and thanked you with hours of fucking. 

You mirrored him, leggings, and a warmer overcoat. Ren had gathered your hair back into a high ponytail, tugging it while you were putting on makeup so he could kiss you from above. He hadn’t spoken since he commanded the both of you to dress, and you were anxious to see what he had planned for your shopping trip. 

\----- 

The drive was silent, no music or small talk between the two of you. He had taken you in his second car, not the special Porsche, since you weren’t allowed to dirty the leather unless he needed to show you off. Ren had even gotten the two of you coffee at a local Starbucks, it made you feel warm. Like the two of you were a normal couple, out doing normal things. The thought tugged on your heartstrings, sliding your hand into his free one without permission. You instantly tensed when you realized what you had done, but there was no turning back. You looked out the window at the passing scenery, taking in shallow breaths as you felt Ren’s eyes digging into you. 

Much to your surprise, he accepted your palm, rubbing the peaks of your knuckles with his thumbs before setting it down so he could take a drink. Ren audibly sighed at the fresh taste, pulling into a parking lot before he spoke, “We’re here, Love.” 

You squealed with excitement, ready to shop for new hobbies and books for you to spend your time and finally have something to do with your time that you spent alone. No more sitting in the basement tied up for bad behavior, he was trusting you to do something for the house, your house. 

Throwing off your seatbelt, you scrambled out of the car, again without permission, and took in a deep breath. When you opened your eyes, your smile fell, in front of you wasn’t a strip mall or craft store. It was a library, at one of the outer community colleges of the area. You opened your mouth in protest, but Ren beat you. 

His large hand wrapped around the nape of your neck, tugging on the delicate baby hairs. Not enough to make you scream, but enough to gather your attention, “Let’s not have a bad day, okay? You’re treading awfully close towards earning a week downstairs.” 

You tried to nod your head, “Yes-yes-I’m sorry. I’ll be good.” 

Ren hummed, “Although,” his teeth sunk into your earlobe, to any bystander it would look like a round of kinky foreplay. But it was a threat, he was digging his canines into your soft flesh to prove his point. “I do miss seeing you all tied up, covered in your own spit. Maybe, I’ll treat myself to something nice since you’re getting what you asked for.” 

You stayed still on bated breath for him to release you, afraid that any movement at all could send you home with a seat in the trunk. He had done it before, and you didn’t want another gasoline induced headache. Ren kissed your reddened ear, before sliding his hand down to your own, tugging you forward to the entrance. 

Inside was quiet, the librarians paid you both no mind as Ren waltzed in. Tugging you along behind him like an obedient dog. He whizzed right past the gardening section, pulling a whine from your throat. 

“Zip it.” 

“But.” 

Ren spun you both, pinning you to the nearby wall, and clasped a hand over your mouth, “What has gotten into you today? Huh?” He shook your face, pushing his hips into your own to keep you still, “Do you want to make yourself useful in our house? Or should I skin you to make a nice area rug?” 

You whimpered, shaking your head softly. Tears were pricking your eyes, threatening to cascade down your face and onto his fingers that surrounded your jaw. Ren exhaled on your face, pulling his hand off and kissing you softly, “I’m sorry, Love. I just want you to be good for me today. You must pay attention to what’s happening.” 

He leads you towards a row of empty computers, seating you in front of a monitor while he sits next to you. Ren had you login in, and head to one of the college webpages, you scrunch your brow when you logged in. You had an account with the college? Complete with your full name, address (his house), and a set of courses you were enrolled in. 

“You’re welcome,” he whispered, “You have a lot to catch up on, I suggest you do it quickly. Your first exam is tonight.” 

Your classes were all computer-based, revolving around hacking, codebreaking, code writing, and a few finance courses. Ren had you sit at the computer for almost five hours going through the set of 6 courses, each one teaching you new techniques on how to get through security firewalls and passwords on systems you created yourself or the professor did for you. Ren said nothing during it, briefly stepping away to speak on his phone but you weren’t close enough to hear what his honeyed words were saying. 

By the end, you were well versed in the basics of computer programming and had made a few websites as assignments. Your professors were impressed that you finally showed up, a week after classes had started, and they enjoyed your work that was turned in for the week prior. You beamed at their praise, enjoying the challenge of something you weren’t used to. It wasn’t gardening… but it was stimulating enough to keep your interest. 

You didn’t even notice when Ren sat next to you again, rubbing your lower back with his right hand. He pressed his lips to your clothed shoulder, purring into you, “Feel better now?” 

“Uh-huh,” you mumbled, focusing your attention on the series of codes that were presented on the screen. Ren hummed into you, usually he would scold you for such small answers, but he seemed content in you learning the material. You glanced over to his lap, he had gone through and grabbed a couple of manuals on personal finance, firewall technology, and code-breaking. 

“Come now,” he stood from his seat, “I have a meeting at 6, and I cannot be late.” 

“Oh,” you mumbled, glancing up at his form, “Okay, can I finish this at home?” 

“We will see how you perform tonight.” 

\----- 

As he said before, Ren was gone from the house by 6, leaving you all alone. You were antsy, reading through the books he had gotten you to pass the time. It wasn’t hard to grasp, the codes all mirrored around certain chains, and there were only a few variations that you were exposed to in the course. What puzzled you was the finance book, it was boring and you didn’t have any bank accounts so you didn’t understand the point of it. 

You had plowed through almost the entire computer tech book, before passing out on the couch. The only noise is a soft hum of music that you set on the stereo, classical piano. Ren said it stimulated the brain, it was beautiful in a way. But hauntingly so, almost like it was setting the tone for your impending doom. 

_“Wake up,”_ a soft voice cooed in your ear. A cold hand caressed your cheek, followed by more words, _“Wake up for me Angel, I need your help.”_

A few kisses, bitter from the midnight wind. Almost liquid in their texture, like they were bathed in oil. _“Love,_ please wake up. I need you.” 

You stirred, rolling away from the cold embrace that was surrounding you. It wasn’t ice cold, but a slippery cold, sending chills through your body as it caressed you more. “Wha?” 

“Get up,” the voice was angry now. The once soft touches were biting into your skin, causing you to yelp out of your slumber. It was dark, the music now is gone and replaced with breathing. A raspy sound coming from the floor, your breath shallow and quick like a rabbit. You tried to blink away the darkness, willing your eyes to focus on something. 

A large hand gripped your face, yanking it towards the perpetrator. Ren’s silhouette was visible through the inky fog, his eyes shining. You could tell he was agitated, his normally wide innocent pupils were narrow with rage. His left eye twitching as he watched you wake, “Get up you useless whore,” he gave you a sharp smack. 

“We don’t have much time.” 

“Kylo?” 

Two long fingers shoved down your throat, coated in a coppery substance that pooled on your tongue. You gagged on them, thrashing your head back and forth to throw him off you. Ren’s thumb hooked under your chin pulling you close, “Love, what did I just say?” You tried to reply, throat gargling as he fingered the back of it. “I’m going to give you some numbers, and I need you to make them disappear. Do you understand?” 

The rasps grew louder, drawing your attention from his stare to the dimly lit floor. You gasped around his fingers once you saw the damage, a girl was on the floor. No older than you, her jaw was broken, hemorrhaging on the carpet. One of her eyes was taped over while the other was searching wildly in the dark, you sobbed as you looked lower. 

Her right hand was gone. 

Replaced by a ziplock bag that was duct-taped around the wrist to stop the blood flow from getting worse. 

“Love,” Ren growled, “The poor thing is scared, don’t you want to help her?” 

You shook your head violently, flinching away as the body’s left arm tried to reach for you. Tucking your legs underneath your bottom on the couch, your hands flew to Ren’s wrist. Yanking on them for dear life, Ren took the hint and released your mouth, “Kylo! What the fuck is happening?!” 

You looked back at him, Ren wasn’t looking at you. Instead, smiling down at the dying girl, his foot pressing over her left cheek and squishing it down into the carpet like you would a grape. 

“She’s just a toy.” 

Silence. 

“Since I can’t torture you anymore,” Ren mumbled, “You grovel too much for it to be fun anymore. So I found a new one.” 

“ _What_ ,” your heart ripped apart, looking down frantically at the girl and back to Ren. His figure came into view. He was doused in blood, his clothes were ripped and handprints were painted all along them. His eyes were wild, smiling at the victim, his face was covered in blood. Like he had been drinking it, he leaned over. Placing his lips onto their own and moaned lewdly at the taste. You choked back on a sob, watching him crawl over her wounded form. 

You knew what he was doing. 

But you watched anyway. 

\----- 

Ren had dragged the lifeless body to the basement once her wails finally halted. 

Smearing blood across the floor and tossing her downstairs. 

You sat at the kitchen table, covered in blood. Shaking violently as your brain tried to process what you had witnessed, Ren made sure you were awake through the whole thing. 

He wanted her to die, taking maximum pleasure in taking it from her. He was her God, and he wasn’t letting her go, ripping her apart piece by piece. Savoring in the wails of pain that ripped through her throat. 

_And the begging._

Oh, the begging. Her sweet voice rang in your ears, pleading for you to save her. To push the horrible man off and out of her, she offered everything she had. 

_“Please don’t let me die!”_

But you did. 

You couldn’t have helped even if you wanted to. Ren would’ve killed you just like he did to her, cracking her neck with his bare hands. His giddy laughter ringing off the walls after the final crunch of her vertebrae, he kissed you after. 

Whispering how much he loved you, how much he needed you. How proud he was of you for staying still and listening to him, smearing her blood all over your face. And he didn’t stop there, he mounted you quickly after. Pinning your face into the pool of cooper, declaring how he knew you were for him, how he knew you liked it. 

The basement door slammed shut, causing you to yelp in surprise. Hugging your knees to your chest as Ren approached you. His clothes were gone, all that adorned him were his blood-stained boxers. A furious erection poking through them as he stepped in front of you, “Well done, love.” 

Ren slammed down a purse, streaked in blood. He motioned to it with his right hand, while he left yanked his cock free. Moving closer to you, rubbing the tip on your lips as you sobbed. You were traumatized, not only had he cheated on you, but he murdered someone in cold blood. Again, just because you couldn’t save them. 

“Come now, give Daddy a kiss.” 

You glared up at him, popping your mouth open, small enough to let the head slide in with little resistance. Above you, he sighed, “You’re much better at this than her. She kept nipping me with her teeth. Virgins never know what they’re doing.” 

You bit him. 

**Hard**. 

\----- 

Your arms ached when you woke. 

They felt like they were being pulled from their sockets, suspended from your body by an unknown force. 

Blinking lazily awake, you took in your surroundings. You were in the basement, dark red pools of blood marked where the body of his latest victim had sat. Trailing across the room, but there was no sign of it now, it was just you. Hanging from the ceiling by a meat hook, your ankles chained in a spreader bar to the floor. 

“Kylo?” you mumbled, unable to enunciate the words due to a piece of metal between your teeth. Shoved behind your back molars, ripping at your lips to keep the bit in position. You shook your head side to side, the chains singing into the dim room. 

“Good,” Ren spat, “You’re awake.” 

Slow steps came from your right, his form coming into view. He was clean, freshly showered judging by the dampness of his hair. He smelled fantastic, momentarily dulling the sirens in your brain from his strong musk. You whimpered at the sight of him, hoping he would let you free of your bonds. 

“It would be wise to keep your heart rate to a minimum love, I don’t want to end our game this soon.” 

He stepped up to you, his nose directly in front of yours, taking his hands out of his pockets to trail up your naked torso. You shivered at his touch, his fingers dancing across your ribs and between the valley of your breasts. “I’ve been too lenient on you,” he mumbled. Trailing his fingers towards your nipples, pinching them roughly before rolling them between his thumbs and forefingers. 

“I thought you were my good girl. Listening to me, needing me, loving me,” he sighed, “But then you had to go and make a stupid decision.” 

“Maybe you aren’t worth the time I’ve put into you.” 

You shook at that, trying to make him understand that you were worth it. You loved him, you didn’t want to die like that girl, or like David. You were his love! Not just a toy! He had taken you for a reason, didn’t he love you anymore?

“Hm,” Ren gave you a sharp slap, yanking the horse bit from your mouth, “Are you still worth it, whore? Or do I need to find a more obedient pet who will worship me better than you? Maybe I’ll fuck her over your lifeless body.” 

You thrashed at your bonds, “No-no Kylo, I’m sorry, I’m good!” 

“I don’t think you are anymore.” 

Ren circled you, stopping directly behind you. You heard the stretch of a rope, his hands rubbing up and down the length. You strained to look behind you, desperate to see what he was doing. With your bottom lip trembling, you whispered, “Please let me down…” 

“I suggest you keep your mouth shut, I don’t want you biting your tongue off.” 

A snap came from your right, your entire body twitched at the sharp noise. 

“You’ll count, and I expect a thank you.” 

Without an answer Ren cracked the rope against you, your body seizing in a rictus of pain. You screamed, blood-curdling wails falling from your mouth. The leather whip dragged up your legs before he did it once more. Already you could feel the blood flowing from the lashes. 

**“Those aren’t fucking numbers Sweetie, you better do what I say or I swear to fuck I will leave you here to bleed out!”** Ren shouted at you, bringing a hand to your two lashes and twisting a finger into the wounds. Your back muscles flexing to try and push his digit out of you. 

**“What’s it going to be?”** Ren spat in your ear, **“Do you want to fucking die? Tell me and I’ll make sure to keep you alive long enough to feel every cut.”**

You let out a pained sob, bowing your head to your chest as you screamed, “Two! That’s two!” 

Ren chuckled, his arm rearing back behind you before cracking the whip across you once again. You couldn’t see him, but you could feel his happiness. The pure submission you gave him as you wailed in pain while spitting out the count after each one. 

The backs of your legs were streaked in blood, rivulets dripping to the floor from where you were suspended. He didn’t stop until you were hoarse, each lash was in a new area. Cutting through your once beautiful flesh, being remarked as his, his body, his property, utterly his.

———

“Make sure those don’t scar,” Ren spat above you, “I don’t want to see them every time I fuck her.” 

“Of course, Ren,” Another deep voice rang above you. 

You moaned out in pain, attempting to lift your body from the table you were propped on. Stark white lights were flooding the room, bearing down on your bloodied skin. A firm hand pressed down between your shoulder blades, “Don’t fucking move Love.” 

“I-I’m what?” you mumbled, straining to open your eyes, “Kylo? What’s happening?” 

“Shush,” Ren pressed again, “How much longer will you be Cardo? She has work to do for me.” 

“If she keeps moving, it could be another few hours,” the man grumbled, a second set of hands were now prodding at your flesh. You let out a muffled screech, your throat raw from the beating earlier. Fingers were ripping the scars apart, running up and down the lengths before a deep hum rang again, “Is there any way to sedate her?” 

Ren chuckled, gripping behind your neck, _“Is there any way to sedate her?”_ He let out a sarcastic laugh, “Of course there is.” 

You felt your head be manipulated by another set of hands. A set of oxygen tubes being thread over your ears and into your nostrils, cool gas feeding into your lungs. You hummed, body instantly relaxing. A set of lips pressed to your left ear, kissing at the soft flesh. Tilting your face so your right cheek was flush with a small pillow, letting your mouth flop open. Ren whispered to you, “Be a good girl for me,” he brushed your sweaty hair back, “I don’t want to punish you anymore, just be good and breathe.” 

“ _Mkay_ ,” you giggled moments before you passed out. 

——— 

The scars healed nicely, Ren took you to an actual doctor’s office once a week for treatments. Meeting with a physician named Cardo, who was oddly pleased with you. He didn’t ask any questions, Ren let you know prior that he was briefed on your injuries and past ailments. You had a feeling he knew more than that, he and Ren were far too chummy at the appointments. 

Rounds and rounds of stitches, laser therapy, and medicine left you with faint trails of scar tissue. Ren didn’t want them, but when it was late at night he liked to trail along the thickest one with his fingers. Draping you over his lap, fully naked, so he could absentmindedly caress you to sleep. 

You never asked about the girl, she was gone. Ren didn’t bring her up further than he had to, he made you go through her purse once you were recovered. Erasing her existence, finding social security numbers, banking numbers, phone numbers, anything that traced her to someone else. He was so proud of you, walking you through the steps. Your online courses made sense then, he needed someone to hack into his victims’ lives. 

Unable to trace anything back to him. 

All her savings were deposited into an offshore account, Ren didn’t give you any information about it. Only telling you that it was better you didn’t know, for your safety. 

Ren never brought a victim back, at least alive. He would only bring you purses, or briefcases. No names, or specifics on where he found them. Just wanting you to erase them. 

It was a ritual for you both, sitting on the couch together with a cup of warm tea or whiskey. Laptops in hand, Ren would take notes on the victim, complete with images. Sometimes Ren would hold one of his palms open, wanting you to trail your fingers over the creases while you read through something. It calmed him, knowing you were there with him as he itemized his cruelty. While you made the both of your richer. 

——— 

You laid on the floor, picking at the black rug between the couch and coffee table. Ren had been in his office for two hours now. Yelling at whoever was on the other line, he told you to stay put. But he sounded so stressed out, you wanted to go coddle him. 

But your freshly scarred lashes made you think twice… the risk of being hurt again lingered. It had been the first time he beat _beat_ you in months, and you weren’t ready for another round. 

You huffed, pushing off the floor, and softly padded to the door. Taking a deep breath as you leaned against the wood, straining to hear what he was saying. You couldn’t make out much, other than his angered breathing. 

Before you knew it, Ren had ripped the door open, causing you to fall into his chest. 

“What are you doing?” 

You looked at him with wide eyes, “I’m sorry, you just sounded upset… I wanted to check on you.” 

“Didn't I tell you to stay out there?” 

You nodded. 

Ren squinted at you, pushing you to stand in front of him with his hands clasped on your shoulders, “What’s gotten into you? You’ve been pushing boundaries over and over.” 

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, “I’ll leave you alone, I just…” 

He let out a deep sigh, moving past you to the stairs. Silently commanding you to follow him, you padded after him. Absentmindedly stripping when you made it to the bedroom where he watched you from the bed. You moved to him quickly, straddling his lap and burying your fingers into his mane. 

“You’re lucky I’m in a forgiving mood my love,” he mumbled into your neck. His thick arms tightening around your torso to keep you flush with him. You nodded against his head, working his scalp, the way that makes him purr like a cat. Ren sighed softly into you, rocking you in his lap as his stresses melted away from his tense shoulders. 

A few moments later, Ren rolled you to your back. His arms still holding you, Ren lifted his head from the crook between your neck and shoulder. His dark eyes dancing across your face as his soft lips parted. You stopped scratching him, waiting for his command. 

Ren exhaled onto your face, _“Kiss me, please.”_

Your eyebrows shot to your forehead, surprised at the tenderness of his voice. It was barely above a whisper, you obeyed without question. Starting your line of kisses at his forehead, threading your hands back through his hair. Moving to his temples, being sure to kiss them thoroughly to rid his migraine. Ren hummed as you moved, his eyes lazily shutting as he leaned into you. Tracing every freckle and mole that adorned his skin, showering his face and neck in soft pecks. Making your way to his plush lips, Ren whispered into your own before you sealed yourself to him. 

“Thank you.” 

You pulled off softly, petting the stray lock of hair that fell across his forehead. You pinched his ears, earning a grunt from Ren. You felt strange, a bubbly feeling stirring in your stomach as you took in his calm state. Your arms went limp as you watched, enthralled in the pure devotion he was giving you through his gaze. Ren didn’t say anything, instead bringing his lips to peck at your own, before mouthing to the hinge of your jaw. Being sure to kiss each dent that permeated the area, “I’m sorry I hurt you,” Ren mumbled. 

Your throat clicked as you swallowed down your tears, never in your life did you think that Ren would apologize, for anything he did to you. 

He continued to your neck, mouthing against your jugular towards the scar from your implant. Taking the time to trail his tongue along the incision before kissing the furthest edge. You felt a rumbling from Ren, his face still buried below you. And then you felt it, wetness pooling along your collarbone, followed by soft sniffles as Ren moved along. 

“I-I,” you stammered, constricting your arms around his shoulders. Wanting to cradle the man, his tears making you tear up in response. You didn’t want to cry, you didn’t want to feel these things. It was easier when he was evil, beating you black and blue. But you didn’t want this, tearing your soul apart just for him to kiss it back together. 

More soft apologies fell from his lips, followed by hotter welts against your skin. You couldn’t, you couldn’t listen to your broken heart. But it was screaming… 

_Forgive him._

_Love him._

_Don’t you see?_

_How broken he is._

Ren pulled up from your chest, tears streaming from his cheeks to splash against your own. He took deep breaths, his face a pink tone from emotion. 

_“I’m so sorry.”_

You fingered his hair once more, thinking about your next move. He didn’t budge, his chest rising and falling with great effort as he waited for something, anything, to fall from your mouth. 

“I forgive you, Kylo.” 

———

“Mrs. Ren,” Hux cleared his throat, his brow scrunched with irritation. You had spent the past 10 minutes dodging questions about your visit with Ren. He had tricked you, tricked you into coddling him, and now here you were looking like an idiot. “Could you please explain to us again, how you were enrolled in schooling?” 

You looked at him confused, “What do you mean? I took some college courses for a while.” 

“How were you enrolled though? During your earlier testimony, you stated that you didn’t graduate from high school, nor do you have any record of a diploma or GED.” 

“Uh,” you looked around, briefly locking eyes with Ren who was still smirking at you. He looked thoroughly entertained, reveling in your squirms, “I don’t know. One day Ren had given me a laptop and I was enrolled.” 

“But you don’t know? How would he be able to do that without your consent, the personal information needed on college applications alone show that you willingly participated.” 

Hux produced a packet, more highlighted portions like the prison sign in. “And here is your signature, confirming that you were the one who filled it out.” 

“I didn’t sign that.” 

Judge Riley banged the gavel, “Mrs. Ren, please try to get your stories together, Hux could I please examine the documents?” 

Hux gladly gave the papers away, standing in front of your booth with a slimy smile on his face. He was elated to be close to you, his piercing blue eyes dug through your skin like you were naked on the stand. 

“Mrs. Ren, if you didn’t sign these, then who did?” 

You glared at Hux, “I’m sure you already know who.” 

“Enough,” Riley exclaimed, “Mrs. Ren, Mr. Ren, this is unorthodox but this evidence is worthless without a test.” 

The bailiff came to your left, holding out a hand for you to take as he led you down. More officers escorted Ren up in front of the judge, your shoulder briefly skimming his right arm. “Now, both of you are going to write your signatures. Followed by a signature of each other’s names, that way we can analyze the penmanship of the document.” 

“With pleasure,” Ren smiled, briefly looking down at you and smirking at the scowl you wore. Two chairs were placed across from one another, along with a clipboard with paper and a pen. You sat down in a huff, propping the board so you were obscured from Ren. He sat down slowly across from you, his legs long enough to slot between your own. Ren cleared his throat, “I'll need to be uncuffed in order to complete your request, Your Honor.” 

Riley waved to the closest officer, who obeyed without question. You shivered when you saw his bare hands, bruises circling his wrists. Your heartbreaking for a moment, remembering how you caressed him earlier today. 

A few moments later both of you had finished, handing the judge your boards before sitting down. The officers hadn’t moved your chairs, so both of you stayed still. You suspected Ren stayed because he was uncuffed, and wanted to be close to you. The judge examined the pages, “Alright, Mrs. Ren, you can go back to the stand. We will discuss the results at a later date.” 

“Please continue Mr. Hux.” 

Once you were settled, Hux turned to the jury. “I don’t have any further questions for the prosecution. It is clear to me that I will not get straight answers from her since everything said today has been either an ‘i don’t know’ or an accusation against my client.” 

You grit your teeth, biting your tongue to not lash out at the man. 

“I move for a mistrial, Your Honor,” Hux smiled. 

“On what grounds?” 

“She is an unreliable witness, and the remaining allegations are from deceased victims that my client isn't tied to aside from her testimonies. I am unable to evaluate her since she is clearly unstable, as the therapy appointments have provided.” 

“Wait,” you yelled, standing from your seat, “You can’t do that! I’m not crazy, it all happened! Just fucking look at me!” 

“Mrs. Ren,” Judge Riley yelled. 

“No-no,” you began to cry, yanking on your dress to pull it off your body. If they wouldn’t believe you, you would need to show them evidence. “Please no, it’s true. Look at me, my back has the scars, my fucking jaw has notches in it!” 

“Order!” 

Finn rushed to the stand, scrambling to get your clothes back on as you sobbed in hysterics. “I’m not lying, just look at my records! Or his fucking computer! I know it’s there!” 

Soon, officers surrounded you. Hooking your arms behind your back as you thrashed and screamed. Tears now streaming down your cheeks, your dress laying on the floor as you were subdued in just your bra and underwear. 

“Please!” you wailed, only met with more restraints. You barely heard Hux over your screams. 

“I implore you once again, based on the therapist's testimony. Mrs. Ren is unreliable and clearly, her testimonies cannot be trusted,” he motioned to you, kicking and screaming at the guards. They had begun to pull you away from the stand, Finn was babbling to the officers. Saying this and that, how stressed you were and how much you had spent in captivity didn’t help you. The only person who moved to help you was Ren. 

Standing swiftly from his chair, even with his hands locked again. He stepped over quickly, trapping your face in his palms. 

“Breathe, Love,” he rubbed his thumbs on your cheeks. You tried to yank away, instead moving to bite his fingers off, “The more you struggle, the more likely it is that you’ll be committed.” 

You froze. 

“What,” you rasped, Ren stayed close to you. The only stable thing in the room. All around you people were yelling and screaming, even the guards holding you weren’t paying attention. 

Ren leaned in to kiss your forehead, “They’ll send you right back into a cage,” he hummed against your sweaty forehead. 

“And this time, there will be no one there to protect you.” 


	7. The Fourth Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A cool breeze nipped at your exposed legs, causing goosebumps to erupt over your skin. You were curled into your comforter, comfy and safe, your cheek pressed against your pillow. Lips pursed and a small amount of drool seeping into the fabric. A creak came from the corner of your room, slightly rousing you from your slumber. You glanced around, your drooping eyelids barely taking in the scene. In your sleep riddled state, you didn't see him, his large figure stalking towards you. The whites of his eyes shining in the moonlight, it wasn't until you felt a palm slide up your side. Following the natural contours of your body, the warmth emanating from it lulling you to sleep once again. A dip in the mattress, the springs creaking under the weight. 
> 
> Hot breath fanned over your neck, soft lips pressing onto the back of your ear. A deep hum filling your senses, you sighed. Cuddling back into the figure, wanting to get closer to the warm entity. A low chuckle sounded behind you, and then... 
> 
> Nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOME STRETCH BABY!!!   
> hey there is a very serious trigger in this chapter and i have tagged it appropriately when it's safe to read again once the part starts.   
> IN NO WAY am I glamorizing miscarriages, this is added in to connect the reader to Kylo. Nothing more, if it makes you uncomfortable i have tagged the beginning and ending of that part. 
> 
> TW/CW: This is dark shit, like explicitly horrible shit happens in this. However, I enjoy reading dark fics, and I super loved Stalker Clyde by @clumsycopy & was inspired by the oneshot EOS by @thetorturerwrites and I wanted to write something with the sameish tone for Halloween. NSFW, Violence, Murder, Non-con elements, Domestic Violence, Surgery, Explicit sex, oral sex, anal sex, sex toys, waterboarding, forced feeding, MISCARRIAGE, PHANTOM PREGANCY, Animal abuse (just a brief mention, I do not go into any detail). 
> 
> I also wanted to add that phantom pregnancy is a real thing, I did do my research and it does happen to women all over the world. It is a serious medical issue and can cause people to have miscarriages and still births. DO not come for me for not doing research, I have done a fuck ton.

“Something I don’t understand is,” Finn handed you a cup of tea, taking a seat across from you at the kitchen table. You knew he was uncomfortable, and upset with you for lying and starting a scene at the trial but he wanted to help you. “Why didn’t you tell me you went this morning?”

You sipped slowly, curling into the blanket you grabbed from the bedroom, one of Ren’s big black ones. The silk fur melted away all your stress as you settled, “I knew you didn’t want me to…”

Finn sighed, rubbing his face with his hands before he spoke through them, “I need to know if you’re still talking to him, this is a murder trial. Not some small petty misdemeanor case,” he looked over towards the living room, “You can’t keep doing this. We need you to try and think straight, I know you’ve been through so fucking much. But, we’re losing and Ren is going to get out.”

“I know.”

“Hux tried again after you were escorted out to vote for a mistrial, meanwhile Ren was chasing after you like he was your bodyguard!”

Silence.

“Please,” Finn whispered, reaching across to hold your left hand, “Just tell me, are you trying to throw the case out so that he can be free?”

“No-no,” you whimpered, “No I’m not!” Your lip trembled as you yanked away from him, throat clicking as you tried to swallow back your tears, “He keeps tricking me, I’m not trying to do anything.”

“Shouldn’t you be able to recognize his traps by now?”

\-----

You shifted the laundry basket on your hip, reaching with a shaky hand to open the basement door. You had forgotten to run a load last week and Ren was upset that one of his button-ups wasn’t clean so now you were to finish the laundry before getting a reward.

Ren had started giving you more freedom, dangling treats in front of your begging eyes whenever he had the chance. Yesterday, you spent an entire two hours massaging his back and he gave you a cell phone. Locked with only contacts he could program into it, so he could keep track of you when he was at work. The day before that he got you a lounge chair for the deck, so you could read your books out in the sunshine, all because you sucked his cock while he was on a Zoom meeting. He came twice, and even pissed and you swallowed it all like the good girl you were.

You were hoping your next reward would be a trip to the store, you had been suffering from cramps for the past few days. Headaches pounding hard enough for you to throw up when Ren was fucking you, which earned you a beating followed by concern for your health. Now he was monitoring your food, thinking you had an allergy or something. You had thrown up every morning since then, smells that used to be divine were nauseating.

Your shampoo.

Freshly ground coffee.

Ren’s cologne.

Triggering something in your brain for you to become violently ill, along with other symptoms that were alarming for Ren. But you paid them no mind, your first thought was that he was poisoning you. Finally fulfilling his promise that he would kill you and replace you with another.

You loaded the washer, humming a tune to yourself while the soap was added. It freaked you out being down here alone, but Ren refused to move them upstairs even with your bribe of sucking him off like a feral animal.

Bending down to empty the dryer you felt a sharp pain in your stomach, causing you to yelp in shock. Doubling over to the cold concrete while you waited for it to subside, but it just got worse. Now radiating from your stomach to your nether regions, you crumbled to your knees as another wave coursed through you. Now fully screaming from the sharp pain, it was akin to the feeling of Ren whipping you. Like your body was ripping apart from the inside out, “Kylo!”

“Kylo! Please!”

You took in a deep breath.

“KYLO HELP ME!”

His footsteps tumbled down the stairs, followed by his angry voice, “I was on the phone-,” Ren stalled, rushing over to your curled form. “Love, what’s wrong?” You let out another pained cry, bile threatening to spill out of you as you screamed over and over.

“It hurts!”

“What hurts?”

Ren’s arms wrapped around you, constricting around your middle which made you scream even louder. Smacking his hands away, “Stop! You’re hurting me!”

“Jesus,” he ran his fingers through his hair as he stared at your tear-stained face. Bent over the floor to where your cheek was flush with the icy floor. He came closer to you again, “You’re bleeding.”

“Please make it stop,” you whimpered, wincing as another wave hit you.

Again, Ren touched you, cautiously this time. He kneeled behind you and pressed on your bottom, lifting it in the air so you were on your hands and knees. You shook your head, “No, not now Kylo it hurts!”

“I’m not going to fuck you,” he snapped, “There’s blood all down your legs.”

You flinched when you felt his palm skate up your inner thigh, moving towards your throbbing core. Ren was breathing heavily behind you, like he was on the verge of an outburst that you couldn’t handle right now.

“Love,” he whispered, “When was the last time you bled?”

“What do you mean,” you whimpered, pushing off the floor to look over his shoulder. He wasn’t looking at your face, only at the dark blood trailing down your thighs, “I don’t-I don’t remember…”

“Fuck.”

He wiped his hand on his black jeans, quickly picking you up from the floor despite your wails in pain. Running up the first and second flight of stairs to your master bathroom, dumping you in the tub. Ren pointed a finger at you, “Don’t move.”

You nodded, the pain subsiding after hitting you wave after wave. Through the doorway you watched Ren grab a bag from the closet, shoving clothes inside it in a crazed rush. You called out to him, “What are you doing?”

“Just breathe Love,” he grabbed more clothes, not even folding them before shoving them in a disorganized pile. Ren came back to the bathroom with some black sweatpants and a sweatshirt, stripping out of his stained jeans to throw on his own pair. Without consideration of your pain, he stripped you bare in the tub. Throwing your clothes in a pile at the foot of the tub, blood streaking on the porcelain. You looked down between your legs, blood was trickling out of you along with heavy clots. Crimson red, none of your periods had been heavy like this, you gave Ren a scared look. Met with an anxious grimace before he shoved a damp towel between your legs, “Try to clean some of it please, we have to go to the hospital.”

“Why?” you squeaked, it was sensitive down there as you swiped up the blood on your thighs, “I’m just on my period, I need some tampons-.”

Ren shook his head, threading your limbs through a sweatshirt he had shoved onto you, “No it’s not, something’s very wrong.”

“But,” you mumbled but he latched a palm over your mouth.

“Love, don’t fight me on this. I need to make sure you’re okay.”

\------

**HEYYYYY this next part is really triggering okay, there is a miscarriage in it along with a stillbirth. I did research phantom pregnancies and it is common enough in women to have it until the second trimester. I’m not making a stand or anything by involving it in this story, it’s here to add to the connection between the reader and Ren. There is nothing funny or sexual about having a miscarriage and that’s not at all what happens in this chapter. If you don’t want to read it I am adding a summary of it at the end of the section so you know when it’s safe to read again.**

\-----

The emergency room wasn’t too packed, Ren had driven you to a hospital that was on the outskirts of town. Probably so people wouldn’t recognize him from the billboards of his political career, it wouldn’t look good for him to be at a hospital with a woman bleeding out. You tried to keep the blood from staining the car, but your tampon overflowed soon after. Waves of cramps made you feel like all your blood was draining out of you.

“Mr. and Mrs. Ren?”

He carried you in, explaining quickly what was happening to the nurse since you were fighting off tears from another round of pain. Not wanting to scream and scare all the other patients, even though you wanted to rip into Ren’s shoulders from the pain. You know you were already hurting him from your grip, digging your nails into his scalp and right shoulder as he shifted you on his hip like a child.

The nurse quickly instructed you to lay on the bed after changing into a hospital gown, she needed vitals before sending in a doctor. You sobbed as you undressed, aided by Ren rubbing your back as each movement shot spikes of searing hot pain through you. He grimaced once your pants were slid off, more dark blood streaking down your legs.

He lifted you on the bed, holding your hand and kissing your forehead while you waited for the nurse to come back. Even she was taken back by the amount of blood, she rushed through the vitals, you knew she was well aware of the issue but said nothing to you both. They took urine and blood samples from you, letting you know the doctor would be in as soon as possible.

Ren tucked the blankets into your sides, trying to warm you as the IV pumped fluids into you to make up for the loss. He stayed silent throughout the pretesting, letting you whimper in pain and endure your death grip on his hand.

Now you were both alone, you glanced over at him. His face was weary and drooped, some tears gathered in his eyes while he stared at your feet. You opened your mouth but another nurse came in, setting up a heart rate monitor. The steady beeping filling the room, accompanied by a second rapid beeping.

“I’m pregnant,” you croaked, staring at the second jagged line under your heart rate. The weight of the situation crashing into you like a train wreck. The cramps, vomiting, taste, and smell shifts, the blood. You were fucking pregnant, with your captor’s child.

“You were,” Ren whispered. He wouldn’t look at you, just staring at the screen as you both watched your collective child’s heartbeat. Struggling to even out, fighting for the life you weren’t aware of until an hour ago. How could you be so careless? Not noticing the signs, your body changing more and more as you progressed… How did Ren let this happen, he was so strict in his micromanaging.

How did you let this slip through the cracks?

Even if he wasn’t your captor, you made life with a man who was an unstable and dangerous monster. Inside and out, there was no changing that no matter how much he claimed to love you. He wasn’t fit to be a parent, and neither were you.

“Okay Ren family,” the doctor walked in, clipboard in hand. You half expected Cardo to walk through the door, but this man was nothing like Ren’s friends. He was older, a face that was weathered from years of care. Probably was a part of a loving family, he wouldn’t let something like this happen to his own…

You let out a muffled sob, Ren’s hand squeezed yours before he addressed the doctor, “Hello, can you please tell us what’s going on.” You had never heard him sound so broken, pleading with the man to explain how this happened. The doctor took a seat at the side of the bed, between you and the heart monitor as he snapped on his gloves.

“It looks like you’ve been having what we call a ‘cryptic pregnancy’,” he sighed before bringing his hands to your abdomen. Applying slight pressure to the tender area, even through the fabric it felt like needles digging into you. You let out a choked cry, flinching away from him and towards Ren. “It’s not uncommon, but it looks like you were measuring 5 months as of last week. Having one last until the second trimester is possible, but very rare.”

“I’m what,” you whispered, your head whipping towards Ren who was just as shocked as you were. “Five?”

“How is that possible?”

“Sometimes the body doesn’t show signs early enough, I’m sure you’ve been going through cramping and bouts of sickness. I am shocked that it wasn’t obvious, given…” he motioned towards Ren. You let out a nervous laugh, he was mentioning the fact that Ren was huge. His baby should’ve been an obvious intrusion to your physique.

“It seems like the pregnancy was viable until earlier this evening, and now we must take action for your safety and health.”

“Oh,” you whispered.

“I’m sure the two of you are wanting to say goodbye after the procedure, you’ll have time following the birth.”

“She’ll have to give birth,” Ren questioned, his hand leaving yours so he could rub the side of your cheek. The doctor gave a solemn nod, standing from his seat, “Unfortunately yes, she is too far along for a medical abortion,” he turned to you, “Your body has been trying to pass the fetus since the tear in your uterus, once it’s been evacuated we will be able to manage your blood loss.”

With that he left, you and Ren staring at each other in silence.

“Did you know,” he rasped, “Did you hide this from me?”

“No,” you choked. Wiping your face from the tears that wouldn’t stop flowing, you slowly shook your head as the waterworks ran faster, “I-didn’t-know-I’m-so-sorry.”

Ren quickly stood, “No-no-no, Love, I’m not mad.”

He brought his hands to your face, wrenching it so you were forced to look at him. Both of you were sobbing, “I didn’t know either, it’s going to be okay.”

\-----

You were numb when you held your child.

Covered in blood, it’s tiny body swaddled in a towel in your arms. Ren stood next to you, both of you letting out a symphony of pained wails. He was there when you gave birth, sobbing when they let you know the gender. A nurse told him that most families with stillborns wanted to know so they could give a name for their grave.

You weren’t prepared for it, to know that you had a daughter.

_Opal Rose Ren._

Together, you said your first hello and last goodbye.

You begged Ren to take you home, you couldn’t stand to stay there any longer. Everything hurt, your body, heart, and soul. The nursing staff advised against it, saying the first night home could be rough. Most women go through withdrawals, even with a denied pregnancy, that would need to be monitored by a doctor.

“Please eat my love,” Ren whispered, pushing a spoonful of jello to your chapped lips. Both of you hadn’t slept after letting her go, mourning together until the late hours of the night. Ren had left you with a nurse for a brief moment to get some food and make a few calls that couldn’t be pushed any longer.

He sighed when you refused to, if this were three years ago he would’ve shoved it into your mouth without question. But, he was different and so were you, softer with each other. It wasn’t healthy, or normal, but you needed him right now. More than ever.

And he needed you, it was clear now he wouldn’t replace you. All those threats now hollow in the waves of this new reality.

You were bonded now.

\-----

**IT’S SAFE NOW, THERE WILL BE A BRIEF MENTION OF THE BIRTH BUT THERE WON’T BE DETAILS.**   
**SUMMARY: you have a miscarriage after being diagnosed with a cryptic pregnancy. Ren rushes you to a hospital where you both find out that you were 5 months pregnant and you are forced to give birth or bleed out. You both say goodbye to your daughter who was named in the minutes after birth, her name was Opal Rose Ren.**

\-----

Your hair grew out.

Body became more toned.

Breasts were lifted.

You looked healthy, amazing, a model girlfriend. Ren had made you into someone of value to society, which was unfortunate that you couldn’t be in society. He had been treating you differently since you returned from the hospital. Like you were glass, a fragile doll that he was terrified to crack.

He held you closer, kissed you softer, scratched you lighter.

Ren even fucked you nicer.

No hitting, smacking, name-calling, tears, or pain.

You were absolutely petrified of him.

Anytime you did something wrong you watched as he calmed himself from beating you senseless, breathing deeply with his eyes closed. Excusing himself from the room with a kiss to your forehead before storming off into the night.

He always returned late after that.

Smelling of sweat, booze, and blood.

Crawling into bed as quietly as he could, wrapping his arms around you while sighing in relief. Like he was surprised to see you still there, waiting for him. You were surprised too… Every time you left you didn’t think about getting away.

You thought about how angry you would be when he came back, ready to fight him. Accuse him of sleeping around when he had a perfectly good family here.

 _Family_.

“We’re a family, right?”

Ren looked up from his newspaper, setting it on the table with a confused look painted on his brow. You bowed your head into your chest, watching your hand wring in your lap, regretting asking. Of course you weren’t, you were just the person he kidnapped. Tore you from your real family and forced you through unimaginable trauma for four years.

“Of course we are, Love.”

His hand reached into your lap, dragging your feeble left hand into his own. Bringing it to his lips and kissing the knuckles, “Why would you ask that?”

You shrugged, lightly tugging on your hand so he would release it, “I didn’t know.”

“Why wouldn’t we be,” Ren questioned, “We’ve been together every day for almost half a decade, how could we not be?”

“I was just asking.”

“Hm,” Ren tugged on your hand, pulling you from your seat to his side. He scooted out from the table and nodded towards his lap. You perched on his thigh, humming at the contact you rarely received. Rens right hand clasped to your waist, grabbing you a little rougher than he had in the past few weeks. “What would make you happiest my Love?”

“I want you to stay home, stop leaving me.”

“Please.”

Ren squinted at you, “I haven’t left you.”

“But,” you began but he brought his left hand to your mouth. Clasping over it so he could speak over your rebuttal. “Do you know what I’m doing when I leave the house?”

He shook your face, “Huh?”

“No, you don’t. I leave so I can provide for us, provide for you, my family. With each person I snatch off the streets, each finger I rip out, tooth, eye. Slash of a knife against their innocent skin, I am thinking of you, here in our home. Waiting for me.”

“Every pained scream, I think of you. Wishing I could do even more for you, and here you are accusing me of doing the opposite.”

You shook your head, prying his hand off your face, “No-no-no I just wanted to know where you were going. I didn’t know that you were helping us…”

“Would you rather me let us starve?”

“No,” you whined, his hand digging into your hip harder.

“Why do you think I leave bags for you to go through every time I come back? Just for fun? So we can laugh at their IDs?”

“No-Kylo.”

“Get up.”

You scrambled to your feet, standing next to him with your hands clasped behind your back. He glared at you, working his jaw before standing over you. “I’ve been going easy on you, ever since Opal,” his breath slightly hitched at the name, “But I see now that was a mistake. You have no trust in me, and we can’t have that.”

Without a second thought, Ren backhanded you. Allowing you to topple to the ground with a howl in pain, his hands advancing on you quickly after. He dragged you by the ankles to the living room. Draping your screaming form over the arm of the couch, he ripped the clothes quite literally off your back.

“I don’t fucking understand how you could say that!”

You heard something click behind you, your left arm being yanked behind your back. Palm facing up, “I gave you my fucking seed, we had a child together! Does she mean nothing to you? Or do you just expect me to betray you after all that?”

“Kylo,” you shrieked, something had pierced into your palm. A finger running along the cut, making it even deeper before he pulled away. You heard another grunt, looking behind you, you watched Ren drive the knife into his own palm. Seething at the pain as he bled from the thick slash, eyes flashing to yours for a brief moment. He slammed his palm into your own, moaning as he ground the two together, “There. Now we are bonded, all we need is a marriage license.”

Ren fucked you after that, not letting your hand go during the entire thing. Roughly smacking you as he did it, calling you the horrible names you had longed to hear. Every hit sent your pussy spasming around his cock, letting out high pitched squeals of pleasure slip past your throat.

He came inside you quickly, scooping out some of it to feed you with his bloodied hand.

You licked it all, including the slash on his palm. Slurping up the fluids like it was water, you wanted it, wanted him to be yours.

“We need to shower,” he whispered breathlessly, watching you gargle on his finger, “We have a plane to catch.”

\-----

_“Welcome passengers, to sunny Las Vegas, Nevada! Make sure you packed your sunscreen, it’s a cool 107 degrees out there today!”_

_“Welcome Mr. and Mrs. Ren, we have the honeymoon suite all prepped for you. It overlooks our glorious pool and the city skyline.”_

_“I now pronounce you man and wife, you may kiss the bride, Mr. Ren.”_

_“Congratulations to you two, here’s a coupon to our topless buffet. There’s a 90-day return policy on those rings, just in case.”_

_“I love you, Mrs. Ren.”_

_“Nothing will ever keep us apart, ever again.”_


	8. The Final Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summary: A cool breeze nipped at your exposed legs, causing goosebumps to erupt over your skin. You were curled into your comforter, comfy and safe, your cheek pressed against your pillow. Lips pursed and a small amount of drool seeping into the fabric. A creak came from the corner of your room, slightly rousing you from your slumber. You glanced around, your drooping eyelids barely taking in the scene. In your sleep riddled state, you didn't see him, his large figure stalking towards you. The whites of his eyes shining in the moonlight, it wasn't until you felt a palm slide up your side. Following the natural contours of your body, the warmth emanating from it lulling you to sleep once again. A dip in the mattress, the springs creaking under the weight. 
> 
> Hot breath fanned over your neck, soft lips pressing onto the back of your ear. A deep hum filling your senses, you sighed. Cuddling back into the figure, wanting to get closer to the warm entity. A low chuckle sounded behind you, and then... 
> 
> Nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We have one chapter left folks. The trigger warnings have been updated since this chapter is LOADED. 
> 
> TW/CW: This is dark shit, like explicitly horrible shit happens in this. However, I enjoy reading dark fics, and I super loved Stalker Clyde by @clumsycopy & was inspired by the oneshot EOS by @thetorturerwrites and I wanted to write something with the sameish tone for Halloween. NSFW, Violence, Murder, Non-con elements, Domestic Violence, Surgery, Explicit sex, oral sex, anal sex, sex toys, miscarriage, mental manipulation, stockholm syndrome, waterboarding, forced feeding, Animal abuse (just a brief mention, I do not go into any detail).

“Mrs. Ren,” your therapist rubbed her temples. You had spent the past three days inside a ‘time out resort’ after Hux pushed that you were too unstable during the trial. The courts forced you into some more intensive care. 

This is why you were in a white dressing gown, your left wrist chained to a pipe next to a starchy couch. Bright fluorescent lights blinding you while you stared at the woman you used to trust. But now you hated her, almost as much as Ren. 

She had told the courts that you were unstable-unfit to be trusted since your outburst in the court. And when you let Ren coddle you after being dragged away, it raised further questions about the accusations against him. 

Somehow Ren was able to visit you here. 

He came once a day, shackled. Dressed in a stupid prison jumpsuit, his hair long enough to be pulled into a small bun. Looking as exhausted as you felt, the both of you sitting in the common area. Sometimes you spoke, other times you played chess, he always won. A guard yelled at you both when he held your hand, once he was able to sneak a kiss. 

How that kiss made you feel, it was disgusting. 

It was warm and comforting, how he mumbled how much he loved you. Tasting his sweet essence, drinking it down like it was water. You wanted him to hold you, to touch you. Take you away from this place, and that’s exactly what he wanted. That’s why he came at noon on the dot every day, making sure your therapist saw how docile he was with you. 

“I’m not crazy,” you whispered, staring at your cold feet on the tiled floor. “I shouldn’t be here. This is all his fault-he made me look crazy. He keeps tricking me.” 

“Mrs. Ren, your husband has been nothing but helpful during your incarceration. Even when he’s been in the same situation, unless you can show me something. Or tell me something you’ve been keeping to yourself, I have no choice but to side with the defense for a mistrial.” 

You let out a choked sob. 

“I want to believe you, please. Tell me what happened in your last year.” 

——— 

“Har-rrd-er!” you wailed, bouncing on Ren's cock. Legs splaying around his strong thighs, his hands latched to your hips as he brought you down to meet his thrusts. 

Ren had been fucking you senseless since the wedding, making sure everyone saw what a good little wife you were. Letting you have small amounts of freedom every day, so he could see you smile. 

But everything came with a price. 

If he let you go out shopping alone, it cost you being buttnaked on all fours. A chain leash around your neck, being walked around the neighborhood. Gagged with a metal bit, a shiny plug in your ass as he kicked you along the sidewalk. 

Of course, it was during the night, no one knew who he was. All they saw was a kinky couple, your glistening cunt under the warm street lights. 

Ren smacked you across the face, pulling a scream as you recoiled. Clenching around him as you spat blood to the rug underneath you. “Fucking slut, you keep creaming up my cock. Gonna stain my fucking chair with your cum.” 

You nodded, clutching at his suit jacket. Prying into his shoulders as he fucked you. Behind the closed door, you knew, knew that his poor little secretary could hear your moans. Every squeak and grunt that filled his office, how she would have to clean it when you both left for lunch. 

He brought you here as a treat, you have been so good lately. So Ren paraded you around the office, dressed in a slutty black dress and heels. Hair up so they could see the bruised hickeys lining your neck. The huge rock on your dainty finger, how you clung to him when any female was around. 

Fucking you at his desk, making you squirt all over the polished wood. He would have you perched on his lap, back against his chest. Cunt on display for his webcam, licking and nipping at your ear while he fucked you, smacking your pussy raw. Letting whoever was sitting across see how swollen you were, how you clenched around whatever he decided to lodge in your cunt. 

He still had meetings to run, you were just there as a nice distraction. Covering his employees in your sticky cum, face fucking you while they talked budgets and hiring. Shoving two fingers in your ass while you wailed in his ears. 

“Quiet love, Daddy has to hear what they’re saying.” 

Office trips were the most fun you’ve had in years, Ren let you do what you wanted. Sometimes you would bring your laptop, grinding on his lap while he did his work and you did yours. Usually, it was cataloging items he brought home, or you were finishing schoolwork. 

While Ren wrapped an arm around you, typing on his computer, and asked about dinner. 

His employees didn’t understand it. How he was even married, and why he displayed you the way he did. Ren was not a kind boss, cruel and demeaning to everyone in his path. Making you soak your panties whenever he yelled at someone for being incompetent, and he would fuck you right after. No matter where you were, he’d pin you and make your sweet cunt cry. 

“Mr. and Mrs. Ren?” 

“Yes, Kaydel?” Ren mumbled, not bothering to look at her as she cautiously walked into his office. You watched her visibly relax when she saw that you were clothed, smiling on your husband's lap. “Sorry to bother you, but there’s a police officer here. He wants to speak to you.” 

Ren tensed behind you, closing out of whatever he was doing on his computer. Softly pushing you off his lap, he straightened out his jacket. “I’ll be right back love,” he mumbled into your hair. 

You hummed as he left, not listening to what he was doing. Curling into his big chair, sighing at the warmth he left. You heard footsteps approach you, looking up to see Kaydels worried face. 

“Can I help you?” 

She opened her mouth, shaking her head slowly, “No-uh sorry. You just look familiar.” 

You shot her a confused look, “Well my picture is all around this office, so I’m sure you’ve seen me there.” 

She shook her head again, walking around Ren’s desk to be uncomfortably close to you. “Are you from around here? You look like one of my sister's old friends…” 

“Oh.” 

Silence. 

“No-I’m not. I’m from,” you paused, thinking about where Ren was from. Coming up empty, “I’m from the West Coast. I just have one of those faces.” 

“Ah,” she smiled, turning away from you. “That must be it, I’m thinking of this girl my sister went to high school with. She disappeared a few years ago-everyone was super worried about her.” 

You visibly swallowed, voice high as you spoke, “That’s so sad… I’m so sorry for her.” 

Kaydel shrugged, “Oh it’s okay, I’m sure she’ll turn up eventually. People can only hide for so long.” 

——— 

The next evening Ren told you he was having company come over. 

Warning you that under no circumstance were you to go in the basement, you shot him a worried look. He had promised to never bring a woman here again… to betray you again. 

Ren shook his head, “No love, not like that. You and I aren’t going to be the ones involved. We are simply the hosts.” 

“Oh.” 

An hour later the doorbell rang, Ren answered it quickly. Grinning as his guests arrived, you recognized a few of them. The men from the photo, the SRO, the sweet doctor, all of them flooding your living room. Staring down at your shivering form, “Hello again Mrs. Ren,” Cardo purred, “You're looking exceptionally well.” 

“Thank you,” your voice wavered as you took a small sip of your wine. Ren took a seat next to you, petting your hair as the men waited in silence. 

“Love,” you turned to him, “These are some of my oldest friends, they’ve been around me since the beginning. Very loyal, just like you my sweet wife.” 

You smiled, leaning into his soft touches. 

“Tonight, they will be loyal to both of us. Since we are married, I’m not able to inflict the pains I desire without consequences. So they will be doing it for me, us, to get rid of a small needle in the haystack.” 

“Oh,” you whispered, glancing back over to the men. They hadn’t looked away from you, some of them already frothing at the mouth for a taste of you. “What’s happening in the basement?” 

“It doesn’t matter to us, we will be busy by ourselves upstairs while they tie up the loose end.” Ren stood from the couch, “Up,” he commanded, taking your hand in his. He shot the men a look, “Everything you need is downstairs, discretion is key. We will be upstairs if you need anything.” 

“And please, keep her screams to a minimum. I want to be able to hear my wife plead for my cock.” 

———

She screamed. 

For mercy, for death, for it to stop, for more. 

You knew they were all fucking her, taking turns carving into her flesh between each thrust. Making her bathe in her blood, you could barely concentrate on Ren. Kissing and caressing you while her screams were ringing in your ears. 

“Why Kylo,” you cried into his neck, closing in on your naked form. He said nothing, only kept fucking you as you sobbed. “She wasn’t doing anything! She didn’t know!” 

“She knew enough love,” he hissed, “She was going to take you away from me.” 

You shook your head, pushing Ren's face off your shoulder to look into his eyes. Holding his cheeks in both palms as you sobbed. His face streamed with tears, he choked when he spoke, “I’m not losing you-you can’t leave!” 

“Kylo-,” 

**_“No! You don’t get to fucking leave me,”_** Ren snarled, his soft pace stopping. He wrapped both hands around your throat, collapsing your windpipe slowly as he growled above you. Spots were filtering in your vision, you screamed out as loud as you could. He was killing you! Didn’t he know that? 

**_“I don’t care if I have to keep you chained up in the basement for the rest of our lives. You aren’t going anywhere.”_ **

——— 

The bruises stayed for longer than you cared to admit. 

A perfect reminder of your mistake, wanting someone to get away who _knew_ you. A sure-fire escape, and you almost died for even mentioning it. Of course, she needed to die, Ren was not going to let her walk away. 

Kaydel was a necessary sacrifice for your love. 

Ren made you go downstairs after they were finished, her body destroyed. Ripped apart and haplessly stitched back together again, you vomited at the sight of her. But he dragged you to her corpse, forcing you to look at the woman who could’ve taken you from him. Explaining every gruesome detail of her death while you scrubbed the floors with bleach. He wanted you to remember what happened if you weren’t careful, and if someone found you out it would be you who would die next. 

The next evening Ren startled you, screaming at the television in the living room while you were doing the dishes. His yell causing you to drop plates on the floor, making you yelp too. Immediately breaking down in tears when you tried to clean it before he noticed, but he did. 

Storming into the kitchen with a snarl on his face, “What the fuck is your problem? Do you not understand how expensive those are?” Ren grabbed you by the hair, dragging you across the floor, making sure your bare feet got sliced open by the shards. 

He threw you in front of the TV, gripping your face harshly between his thumb and forefinger. Pointing at the screen, “Look at what you did.” You blinked through your tears, focusing on the image flashing across the news. A small picture of Kaydel, her smiling and happy, bile rose in your throat when you remembered all her teeth were plucked out. Next to her photo was yours. 

_Yours_. 

_“The last known whereabouts of Kaydel were reported by her family, saying that the young woman stopped by unexpectedly after work the night before she was reported missing. Her family says that she was unsettled, saying that she saw a ghost of an old friend.”_

You sobbed as the anchor continued, spouting off facts about other missing persons in the area. Men and women who were plucked off the streets, you recognized all of them from the licenses Ren brought home. The description of the clothes you bleached and shredded for him, the bank accounts that were emptied and signed with a pseudonym. Their faces flashed on the screen one by one, followed by a remote interview with the chief of police in the area. 

_“As you can see, we are dealing with many missing persons-all of whom were relatively the same age. The only connecting factor we have that’s led us to believe the kidnappings are strung through the same person is that three of them knew each other. Or at least knew of each other; a young man named David, his classmate Kaydel, and a young woman who has been missing the longest… (Y/N).”_

_“Are there any clues you are able to discuss about the investigations?”_

_“Well, we don’t want to compromise anything. The only thing we know is that they were all identified around one of our local fortune 500 businesses, the First Order. Ran by the former state governor Ben Solo, legal name Kylo Ren.”_

\-----

“I’d like to call Kylo Ren to the stand please.” 

Finn looked around the courtroom, waiting for Ren to stand from his seat. Hands still bound, they didn’t bother letting him get his hair cut this time. The trial was due to wrap up tomorrow, the final verdicts being given after the closing statements. There was just one testimony to proceed. 

He swore on the bible, taking a seat with a huff. Ren brushed his hair from his face, his eyes piercing into yours from the stand. The judge read him the charges that were against him, asking if he was willing to answer the questions the prosecution and defense had. You waited for a witty remark, but he just nodded silently. 

Ren was silent, unblinking as he listened to the questions. Answering in short, stale sentences. 

_“Mr. Ren, how old were you when you met the victim?”_

“27.” 

_“And she was how old when you and her had sexual relations?”_

“18.” 

_“Have you ever forced yourself onto the victim?”_

“No.” 

_“Do you have any evidence of this?”_

“I have many videos of her and I together, from the beginning of our relationship to the moment she decided to bring me to court. All of which has been brought up during discovery, do you have any original questions?” 

_“Mr. Ren, do you have a history of violent behavior?”_

“No.” 

_“Interesting, can you explain to us this police report from 2004. When you were how old?”_

“15.” 

_“Yes, fifteen. Police reports state that you were placed on a psychiatric hold after your boarding school burned down.”_

Silence. 

_“Mr. Ren, this school was the third school you were enrolled in that had burned down. All in a span of three years.”_

“I don’t understand why this is relevant. It has nothing to do with the accusations against me, and I’m sure you can see from the ‘police reports’ I was found not guilty by the grand juries for each case. Every one of the fires was reported by the Fire Department as safety hazards.” 

_“Have you ever hurt someone?”_

“What kind of question is that?” 

_“Are you refusing to answer?”_

“That’s not a fucking question-” 

Judge Riley banged on his desk, “Language, Mr. Ren.” He turned to Finn, “Prosecution, is there a point to your interminable line of questioning? You seem to be leading the testimony around in circles and I can see Hux’s red face begging for another mistrial.” 

Finn cleared his throat, moving away from the stand to recenter himself. You didn’t understand what he was doing, he should be asking about you. How Ren kept you, or who his friends were that helped him, no one had brought up those horrible men during this. Which was probably Ren’s doing, they would show his guilt. 

_“Can you explain to me why your employees all signed NDA’s after the news story that involved your wife and Kaydel?”_

Ren shifted in his seat, bearing his teeth slightly. He had been caught, NDA’s were a legal red flag when it came to trials. Businesses used them to cover up things, and in this instance, it was to cover up the fact that Kaydel ever worked for him. She was erased from everything-HR couldn’t find any records of her working there aside from eyewitnesses. Which all signed NDA’s about her… 

“To protect my business.” 

_“From what?”_

“Being slandered by the media,” Ren scoffed, “Those news reporters and police officers didn’t have any reason to tangle me or my business into their cold-cases. I had my employees sign NDAs to protect my assets, my wife and I’s assets, from being brought into court over some silly investigators hunch.” 

_“But it was found that all three were seen near you, or your business, before being reported missing. Is that not true.”_

“I wouldn’t know.” 

_“Mr. Ren, in your initial interrogation you were recorded as admitting to being in the same venues as all three of these victims. Are you saying that’s not true?”_

Ren shut his mouth, flaring his nostrils as he sat away from the mic. Glaring at the crowd, briefly looking over to his lawyer who was also stone-faced. You sat in silence, trying to see how Ren was getting out of this, it was true. He was last seen around David and Kaydel, but you didn’t know when he was around you before the kidnapping. 

_“It says here, for the jury you can follow along in the printed version of his interrogation, that you were spotted at your office five days before the disappearance with the victim.”_

An image flashed on the projector, Ren standing next to Kaydel. Casually smiling down at her, it looked like he was having a great time. Her hand on his arm, both of them sharing an intimate moment that someone captured. 

_“Is that not you, Mr. Ren?”_

“It is.” 

_“And is this not you, at a fundraiser for your campaign three years ago. Shaking hands with a man named David, after he donated to you. Later to disappear from the hotel, all the CCTV footage being found ‘missing’ during the police investigation.”_

“I wasn’t aware that he went missing.” 

_“You weren’t?”_

Silence. 

_“And this last photo shows your wife when she was 17, not 18, at her job. Surrounded by her coworkers, and can you tell me who is in the background?”_

You squinted at the photo, it was an old image. From your FaceBook back when you were in high school, showing you and three coworkers. All hugging together in your green aprons behind the coffee counter, smiling and loving one another. Sure enough, in the background was a pale face, staring directly at you. 

“Yes, I frequented the Starbucks my wife worked at when she was a teenager.” 

“Oh my god,” you whispered, heart pounding as more images from your FaceBook clicked by. All of them showing in one way or another, Ren looming in the background. The closer the date got to your birthday, the closer he got. Like an animal getting ready to pounce, you shot out of your chair. Ignoring the judge yelling at you as you ran to the stand, screaming, **_“You mother fucker! You were watching me! You sick fucking monster,”_** you grabbed the front of Ren’s shirt, kicking at the bailiff and Finn pulling on your legs as you attacked Ren. Hitting him upside the head while he snarled in your face, no words. Just letting you beat him like he did to you, _**“Fuck you! How long had you stalked me? Were you planning to take me while I was at work??”**_

The room went black before you got an answer. 

\-----

You were tired, arms stiff behind your back. Staring at the cement floor beneath your shaking form. It was like the first week all over again, naked and afraid in the basement. Covered in your own spit, filth, and Ren’s cum. 

Your mouth was so dry, you hadn’t had water in days. 

Duct Taped shut since you wouldn’t stop begging for him to forgive you. He was fed up, just like before, and needed you to be quiet. So he could ‘think’, to deal with the police watching him. Ren had kept you down here for maybe two weeks now, it had been about 48 hours since you last saw him. 

He had kicked you until your stomach was a mess of purple and blue bruises. The sole of his boot was perfectly imprinted on your spine. His punishments were ten times worse than they were in the beginning. 

After all you had been through, the abuse hurt you harder. 

Cutting into your heart, all you could hear was how he loved you. Days before how he praised you for being his good wife, his precious love, how much he cherished you. But that wasn’t him now, he wanted you to hurt. It was your fault they suspected him, it was your fault for drawing attention when he brought you to his work. 

Like it was just _your_ idea to be paraded around. 

You just wanted to stay home, where it was safe. 

Was. 

Your eyes opened slowly, spying a pair of familiar black boots. Standing casually in front of you, not bothering to look up. Ren was probably scowling at you, ashamed for keeping you alive for this long when he could’ve ‘hit it and quit it’. 

“Can you stand, whore?” 

You said nothing. 

He kicked you, “I asked you a question. Can. You. Stand?” 

You feebly attempted to lean your weight off your legs, sliding them out in front of you. Covered in bruises and cuts from days before, your inner thighs beet red from his slaps. Crusted over with his dried cum and your blood. He huffed above you, “Get up.” 

It took you a few tries, but you did it. Hands still bound and face down to the floor as you wobbled before him. No tears left to shed. 

“Is my pitiful excuse for a wife hungry?” 

You nodded. 

“Do you deserve food?” 

You let out a puff of air through your nostrils, squeezing your eyes shut to force yourself from whining. Shaking your head from side to side, no. You didn’t deserve food, that’s why you were down here. 

“That’s right,” he brushed your hair back, “You can’t eat, your mouth is taped shut.” Ren tapped a finger to your mouth to emphasize his point, “Do you remember why I had to do that?” 

You let out a muffled yes. 

“If I take it off, are you going to be a good girl? Like you were before?” 

Another nod and cry. 

Ren gripped the edge, no warning as he ripped it off of you. Keeping your lips pressed together to stop yourself from sobbing, you stood there shaking. Eye’s still shut as you wait for him to let you speak. 

“Very good,” Ren hummed, “Do you understand why I’ve kept you down here? Are you sorry?” 

“Yes,” you squeaked, voice dry and rasped as you spoke, “Yes sir, I’m so sorry.” 

Ren said nothing, pushing on your left shoulder for you to spin. You felt his knife graze the tape on your forearms, careful to not nick your skin as he freed you. His hands rubbing the creases along them, mumbling to himself while he did it. Ren tugged you up the stairs, after putting a collar and leash on you so you couldn’t get very far. 

He had you shower, not joining you like he normally would. Just stood to the side with the leash in hand, the door open while he watched you like a prison guard. Yanking you out when you were finished, all the way to the kitchen where you dripped on the floor. He said nothing while he got you water and some toast. 

A soft thank you was all you gave him as he watched you eat. Taking small nibbles to not upset him, even though your body was screaming at you to eat as much as you could. But you didn’t want to upset him more than he already was. 

Ren loosened the grip he had on your leash, setting something on the table and sliding it over to you. A small box, you recognized it and immediately started balling. Shakily taking it before he snatched it away, your wedding ring. 

He had taken it away after he threw you in the basement, saying you weren’t fit to be his wife for the time being. While you were down there, you heard him fucking other women, making love to them loud enough for you to hear. Wailing behind the tape as your husband cheated on you. 

“You may wear it again.” 

“Thank you,” you cried, sliding it back on your frail hand. Still fitting perfectly, shining at you as a symbol of your love for one another. You glanced over at him, noticing his ring was gone, “Sir where is yours?” 

Ren shrugged, “I don’t think you want to know.” 

“But-” 

“I won’t be getting it back.” 

“Then why,” you swallowed back some tears, “Why do I get mine if you aren’t-we aren’t together anymore?” 

He shrugged again, looking away from your tears. Squinting at the clock on the counter, you set the ring back on the table. Your appetite gone, all you wanted to do was cry. Maybe go back down to the basement. 

“I’m not going to kill you, love,” he mumbled, “I don’t know what I’m going to do, but I can’t do it. Even after you continue to disappoint me.” 

“Do you want to leave?” 

Your headshot up, staring at him with wide eyes. Ren was staring back, looking just as frightened as you felt. Eyes glassy as he took a deep breath, “Do you want to leave (Y/N)?” 

“I-what?” 

“I’m asking you if you want to leave, leave me. Everything we’ve been through, because of everything I’ve done to you. Do you want to leave?” 

“Kylo…” 

“Fucking tell me,” he yelled, snapping the leash to yank you across the table. Knocking the ring off to shatter on the ground, “Are you ready to walk out the front door, never fucking see me again? Is that what you want?” 

You trembled under him, watching through your tears as he waited for you, “No-noo Kylo… I can’t leave, please don’t make me go.” 

“You promised me, Kylo.” 

Ren searched your face, no doubt looking for a lie so he could throw you away. 

_“You promised me…”_

\----- 

“Mrs. Ren, what do you mean he asked if you wanted to leave?” 

“Are you saying that you consented to stay with him?” 

“That goes against all the other testimony you’ve produced, when you willingly stayed with someone who was abusing you.” 

You shifted in your chair, wiping your nose with the back of your wrist. 

“I couldn’t leave. He-he was going to kill me if I did.” 

She held up her hand, “You said earlier that he wasn’t going to kill you, do you not remember saying that?” 

“It was a trick, I know it was. I couldn’t risk it-he promised he would never let me go…” 

“A promise?” 

You nodded. 

“From a man who has consistently shown you that he couldn’t be trusted? Those are your own words, Mrs. Ren, if what you’re saying is true I have to turn this over to the judge. Your stories aren’t adding up anymore, and even though there is clear emotional trauma between you and your husband. This session is subject to the jury’s verdict against your accusations.” 

You were brought back to your room, cold and sterile. The only thing you brought from home was pillows, yours and his. The court was keeping you here for the remainder of the trial, now your therapist was worried you would run if you had the chance. 

Nothing made sense anymore, it was like your brain was scrambled. You couldn’t remember what had happened, or when it happened. All you could think about was going home, wanting to be somewhere familiar. 

“Hello, my love.” 

You gasped, turning around towards the ‘cell’ door. 

There stood Ren, a jumpsuit and all. Hands still shackled in front of him, he stared at your shaking form. You couldn’t believe it, how the hell he got here. But you held your arms out anyway, breaking down into a fit of tears. 

Hiccuping as he rushed over to you, “ _Ky-yl-o sh-e-s gonn-a keep m-me here!”_

“No-no-no,” Ren whispered into your hair, “It’s okay,” he lifted his arms around you, encircling you between his chest and bound hands. Pulling you to the bed, both of you resting on one another. Ren took a deep breath when his head hit his pillow, practically purring at the plush fabric. “It’s okay my love, Daddy’s here. They won’t take you from me, we’ll be home soon.” 

“Even if I’m found guilty, we will be home soon.” 

You shook your head, “No Kylo, they will take you again. Take you from me like they did when I turned you in-I shouldn’t have done it, I’m so sorry.” 

“I know you are love, you were scared. I wasn’t sweet to you-my poor sweet wife,” Ren burning his face into your chest, mouthing at the thin fabric, “I shouldn’t have cheated on you, I love you so much. I know you wouldn’t have done it if it weren’t for me.” 

You hicupped again, pulling his face away from your chest. Looking into his soft brown eyes, how his lips trembled as he cried, this was your fault. You left him, turned him in to the police, made this whole nightmare happen when you could’ve kept your mouth shut and reconciled with your husband. 

_But he also beat you._

_Kidnapped you._

_Raped you._

_Betrayed you._

_Tortured you._

_Hated you._

_Don’t you fucking forget._

Ren watched you as your mind raced, conflicting thoughts from both sides tearing you apart. His arms tightened around you, hands attempting to paw at the fabric of your gown. Pressing his chapped lips to your forehead as he whispered how much he loved you. Leaving you numb to his touch, barely realizing he had undressed you both in your catatonic state. 

Entering your cunt right there in the hospital bed. 

Arms still behind your bareback, clasped around the back of your skull as he thrust in you. Ren moaned as you squeezed him, your legs hooking around his waist on instinct before you realized what was happening. Both of you panting and moaned obscenely, the bed squeaking as he fucked you. You silenced his professions of love by kissing him, melding you together body and soul. 

Oblivious to the fact that the door had opened, guards scrambling in to tear Ren off of you. 

Your therapist stunned in the corner as you wailed for them to let him go. Keeping your claws dug into his shoulders, his arms never leaving you. Growling and snarling at anyone who came near him while he fucked you, pumping you full of his seed while you screamed for them to leave the two of you alone. 

Both of you were sedated as they dragged his naked body away. 

_“How did he even get out?”_

\-----

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> one left! im sorry


	9. Forever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A cool breeze nipped at your exposed legs, causing goosebumps to erupt over your skin. You were curled into your comforter, comfy and safe, your cheek pressed against your pillow. Lips pursed and a small amount of drool seeping into the fabric. A creak came from the corner of your room, slightly rousing you from your slumber. You glanced around, your drooping eyelids barely taking in the scene. In your sleep riddled state, you didn't see him, his large figure stalking towards you. The whites of his eyes shining in the moonlight, it wasn't until you felt a palm slide up your side. Following the natural contours of your body, the warmth emanating from it lulling you to sleep once again. A dip in the mattress, the springs creaking under the weight. 
> 
> Hot breath fanned over your neck, soft lips pressing onto the back of your ear. A deep hum filling your senses, you sighed. Cuddling back into the figure, wanting to get closer to the warm entity. A low chuckle sounded behind you, and then... 
> 
> Nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We made it!

“Is it-Are we rolling?” 

_“Yeah, we’re rolling.”_

“Okay, great,” a sigh of relief. 

You shifted in your chair, smoothing back your hair and itching the microphone that was attached to your shirt collar. Crossing and recrossing your legs, you should’ve worn pants, a skirt was a stupid idea with these boots. You gave a weak smile to the woman across from you, her white teeth flashing the cameras all around the sound stage. 

“Okay,” she looked into the lens, “We are here tonight with one of the victims of the famous 2020 murder trial from New York. She went through over five years of repeated abuse at the hands of her kidnapper, all while he was out killing people around the city.” She turned to you, nodding her head as a show for you to react to the TV. “It’s so nice to have you here, Miss (Y/N).” 

You cleared your throat, shifting once more, “Thank you, it’s a pleasure to be here.” 

“How are you doing?” 

You bit back a scoff, what a stupid thing to ask. After that introduction, what was she expecting you to say, ‘oh I’m fucking fantastic, I’ve been running since the day he was sent to prison and going through intense psycho-therapy to rid myself of Stockholm syndrome.’. 

“I’m great,” you faked a smile, “Always nice to visit New York again.” 

“I’m sure,” she smiled once more, all you could think about were the wrinkles on her face, the crows feet on the corner of her eyes. She must get botox for working at a news station, there’s no way her skin is on with just natural confidence. 

“When was the last time you visited?” 

You had to stop yourself from blurting out an answer, knowing that this would be on national television. Which you knew federal prisons watched, you wouldn’t want to give away any of your whereabouts since the incident. “Uh-it’s been a few years, I haven’t had much reason to be back. My life has shifted to another part of the world.” 

“That’s fantastic! So you’ve been doing well for yourself the past six years?” 

“Yeah,” you gave a genuine smile, “It’s been tough, no off days really. Trying to gain some normalcy from it all, but I’ve done well. I live relatively fearless, of everything.” 

“We have you here because of a break in your case, as I’m sure you know.” 

You gave a grim nod. 

It’s all anyone wanted to talk about since the story flashed on the news last week. Leaving your once quiet home filled with reporters. You weren’t even home when it happened, out getting groceries, gripping your sons’ hands firmly as you walked the aisles. Letting him pick out some snacks for his lunchbox, like any mother would, when your phone blew up. 

Dozens of messages, calls, articles, you name it. 

All with _his_ face plastered on it. 

_Convicted murderer and kidnapper, Kylo Ren, has requested the death penalty. After being found attempting to escape federal prison for the 6th time in the past five years. The convict claims that he ‘would rather die than live another day rotting in his cell’. Dropping all the appeals cases that his lawyers have been pushing since his initial sentencing._

_The former New York state governor was on trial for murderer and disemboweling 9 separate victims and kidnapping an 18-year-old girl. He kept her in his basement as his sex slave for close to 3 years before he married her, the young girl escaping into the streets when she was just 22 years old. Covered from head to toe in gashes, blood, and bruises. Claiming that her husband had beaten her within an inch of her life._

_The subsequent trial lasted three months after his arrest. Leading to him being convicted of first-degree murder, rape, and domestic assault. He was sentenced to life in prison, his then-wife was placed under medical care for an undetermined time._

_Mr. Ren has tried to get his charges appealed since the initial sentencing, claiming that his wife was mentally insane and an unfit witness. Along with other claims that include bribing members of the jury to change their verdicts. The whereabouts of Mr. Ren’s ex-wife is unknown, but he claims that he has kept tabs on her even from ‘the inside’._

“Your kidnapper is being put on death row, which isn’t allowed in the state of New York. Which means he is being transferred over state lines to another prison. However, it hasn’t been revealed where he is being brought because of people interfering with the swap. How do you feel about that?” 

You chewed your cheek, thinking for a moment. There was no way he did this willingly, Ren was never someone to take the easy way out. The last time you heard from him was three years ago, on your son’s birthday. 

Receiving a call from the prison, the only one you had gotten since the sentencing. 

You remember picking up the phone, throat going dry as you whispered that you accepted the charges. Waiting for the operator to connect you to him, after three long years without _his_ voice. 

_“Hello, love.”_

“What,” you whispered, stepping away from the living room of screaming toddlers. Your boyfriend gave you a weird look when your face went white as a ghost. “What do you want, Ren?” 

_“How are you? Doing well I hope?”_

You huffed, moving into your kitchen and ripping a bottle of wine out of the fridge. Taking a drink as you snarled, “Just tell me what shitty thing you have to say so I can go back to my family.” 

_“Oh, yes. Your family.”_ he sighed, _“And what a sweet family it is… little Luke is how old now? I would think he would be about… three.”_

“How do you know about my son?” 

_“Hm.”_

_“I don’t think he’s just yours.”_

“You shut your mouth, Luke is not your son. I’m going to hang up if you don’t get to the point.” 

_“He’s growing up so well. Hairs getting longer, but I know you like to keep it short. But he complained about his ears last time-so big.”_

You took a deep breath, peaking into the living room. Just in time to see your baby boy, smiling and laughing with his friends. Sitting in your boyfriends’ lap, tearing into presents. His big eyes shone with tears of joy when he ripped through a gift that was his favorite color, red. A squeal so loud it could’ve shattered a window, pulling out a giant plush toy. It was like a penguin-mixed with a little dog, no nose, and some sharp fangs. From one of his favorite TV shows, along with a card and some other little toys. 

_“Tell me, love,”_ he chuckled, _“Does he like his present? He sounds over the moon about it through the speaker. What I wouldn’t give to be there to run my fingers through his dark hair, look him in the eyes and tell him how much his father loves him.”_

You made Luke sleep in bed with you that night, holding his small body flush with yours. Running your fingers through his curls as he snored into your chest, small tracks of drool seeping into your nightshirt. Trembling as you stared at the shadows, dancing across the bedroom from the window. Full moon shining, you could’ve sworn the floor was creaking downstairs, the sound of footsteps climbing towards your room rang in your ears. 

You didn’t sleep that night, staring into your son’s face as he woke. Blinking awake to smile as you, his grin reaching across his face. All the way to his ears, large ears, covered by his almost black waves. His long lashes fluttering as he greeted you, “Hi mama.” 

His eyes. 

_Fuck_. 

One of them your eye color, shining back at you. But the other, it was _his_. 

Deep auburn, shining in the sunlight. Daring you to challenge him, defy him, prove him wrong, anything that would allow him to unleash whatever hell lived under his skin. Flowed through his blood, tainting every corner of your psyche. His child, the one you hid from the world. Moving as far away as you could, claiming it was your boyfriends’ child. 

_But he knew._

And Luke was starting to notice. 

“I feel,” you looked at your hands, forcing them into fists to stop them from shaking, “Just fine, he’s not in my life anymore. Just a small chapter in the book of my story, I hope that he finds peace. Wherever he goes.” 

“Peace? For a man that almost killed you multiple times?” 

You nodded, “Yeah, I do. I can’t change who he is, or what he’s done. I can just try as hard as I can to move on. And if being on death row will help him find what he’s looking for then I wish him the best of luck.” 

She gave you a weird look, shifting in her seat, “Do you think it says anything about his guilt?” 

“Guilt?” 

“Yes, for the past six years he has never acknowledged that he was guilty. Claiming that the jury and witnesses were bought and that you were mentally unstable-making up half the accusations against him. Do you think that him asking for the death penalty is a way of admitting that he was guilty?” 

“Hell no,” you blurted out, eyes going wide at the camera, “Oh-can I swear? I’m so sorry.” 

She laughed you off, “You’re fine, we can blur it out. But you sound so confident? Do you think he believes that he’s done nothing wrong?” 

Now it was your turn to laugh, “Not to repeat myself but, hell no. That man knows, he’s very conscious of his decisions. Everything has a purpose, everything is done for a reason, Ren doesn’t waste his energy on doing something for no benefit.” 

“What would be the benefit of being put on death row?” 

You sighed, thinking about Ren, trying to get into his mindset to see how he could angle the sentencing changing. Letting out a sharp laugh as you rubbed your eyes, “Well-you said it earlier.” 

She looked at you confused. 

“New York doesn’t have the death penalty.” 

_New York doesn’t have the death penalty._

_New York doesn’t have the death penalty._

_New York doesn’t have the death penalty._

“Oh my god,” you whispered, looking around the room frantically. “Oh my god-oh my god-oh my GOD- _New York doesn’t have the death penalty!”_ you screamed, shooting out of the chair. Grasping the reporter by her shoulders and shaking her violently, _“He knew! He knew I was coming here! He’s gonna take him!”_

“Miss (Y/N),” the reporters and security officers yelled. Trying to calm you down, but no, she had said it. 

_New York doesn’t have the death penalty._

You ran from the TV station, hailing a cab on the packed streets. Frantically calling your boyfriend over and over, he was at home. Back in Nevada… _where the death penalty is legal,_ with Luke. He wouldn’t pick up, the dial tone ringing three times before his voice sang through the speaker. 

You wailed in the back of the cab, calling everyone you knew back at home. Asking if they could go get Luke from school, if they had seen him that day. Anything to try prove false the sick feeling in your stomach you knew was true. 

Running through airport security as fast as you could, taking the first flight back home. You prayed on the way that your boyfriend had Luke, safe and sound, back at home. Hopefully, curled in his red blanket, snuggling the stuffed animal he got that faithful birthday. 

Even though no one knew where it came from. 

Luke wouldn’t let you get rid of it. 

Claiming his _daddy_ gave it to him. 

You just let him have it, he was three there was no way he would let you take his toy away once he had held it to his chest. Kissing it with his full lips, dragging it around the house every fucking day. It was his best friend, from the moment he saw it. 

You cried on the plane, realizing too late that the gift was from _him_. 

_His real father._

Watching after his miracle child. 

When you touched down in Las Vegas, your phone blew up. Your stomach flipping as you read through the messages from your boyfriend, explaining that he let your friend pick Luke up from school. The same friend claimed that your boyfriend had picked him up, Luke’s teacher calling to let you know someone in a black Porsche picked him up. 

Whisking away _his_ child from under your nose. 

You choked on your tears as you read the message from his teacher, telling you how happy Luke was when he left. How he ran into your new boyfriend's arms, like he had known him for his entire life. She told you that he had introduced himself, Ben was just the most amazing father figure she had ever met. Stowing away Luke, surrounded by toys and chocolate when she waved them off. 

After you gathered your luggage you walked towards the cabs out front. Stopping cold in your tracks when you saw a chauffeur holding a sign that said your old name. 

_Mrs. Ren._

You climbed in, body feeling numb. 

Your phone dinged, a picture being sent to you from an unknown number. 

A picture of Luke, held tightly against _his real father’s_ chest. Drifting off to sleep in _his_ strong arms that once choked you to death. 

_See you at home love, we miss you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love you all!!!!

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and concerns are welcomed, this is a crackfic that I have posted on my Tumblr: @maybe-your-left and again I AM SO SORRY but I wanted to write it soooo.


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